Lost Dreams
by kbymyside
Summary: What happens when Kate and Rick meet in front of their children's school? AU
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything.**

**Author's Note: I started this story a few months ago and originally planned not to upload it, but then I thought maybe there are people a few people out there that might actually enjoy it, so here I am, uploading it. If you happen to find any grammatical errors or spelling mistakes, please point them out to me. Thank you! **

**Chapter 1**

"Daddy!"

Richard Castle barely caught his balance as his redheaded whirlwind of a daughter flung herself at him.

"Hey there, Pumpkin," he chuckled, hugging her to him. "How was school?"

"We learned all about the night sky today. It was so fascinating!", the little girl told him with bright blue eyes. "And I made a new friend. He is only in first grade and really, really shy. I met him at recess," she continued without taking a breath. "He was all by himself and looked so sad, so I went to talk to him and it turns out, he is really funny once you get him to talk to you. Do you want to meet him? His mom hasn't picked him up yet. Come on!" Without waiting for a reply, the 8-year old impatiently grabbed her father's hand and pulled him back through the school entrance towards the sturdy brick building.

Castle let himself be dragged along and laughed quietly at his daughter's behavior. At moments like these he saw a lot of himself in her.

He let her pull him to the corner of the school building, towards a dark-haired boy, who sat on the ground, looking thoroughly forlorn.

"Hi Louis, this is my dad," Alexis started the introductions. "Daddy, this is Louis, my new friend," and on a whisper she reminded him, "He is really shy".

Castle squatted down to be at eye level with the boy. "Hi Louis, I'm Rick."

When the boy looked at him, Castle was met with two large, chocolate brown eyes and a small, hesitant smile.

Not knowing how to react to the boy's silence, Castle tried to coax him out of his shell. "I heard you just started school this fall. How do you like it so far?"

"It's alright," the boy stated vaguely, picking at something on the ground.

"Are you learning lots of cool stuff?" Castle tried again.

"I guess."

"He told me, he already knows how to read. And he's only in first grade!" Alexis told her dad, proud of her new friend.

"You knew how to read before you first went to school," Castle reminded her. "In fact, you were only five years old."

"Yeah, but you are a writer, daddy, I'm supposed to know how to read and write before I start school." Alexis gave him her 'silly you look' and Castle playfully struck his tongue out at her, making her giggle.

"So, what does your mother do for a living, Louis?" Castle wanted to know, still trying to get a conversation started with the boy.

But before Louis got round to answering his question, Castle caught sight of a woman in a grey pantsuit and shoulder-length curls walking toward them hurriedly, car keys jingling in her hand.

"Louis, baby, I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry I'm late!", she called, almost jogging now - in incredibly high heels as Castle noted with an arched eyebrow.

At the sound of woman's voice, Louis quickly scrambled to his feet and met her halfway. He threw his arms around her middle, pushing the front of her blazer out of the way, giving Castle an undisturbed look at the police badge, that was clipped to her belt.

"Your mom is a cop?!" he asked, childlike amazement written all over his face.

"And you are?" the woman replied, looking him suspiciously up and down while hugging her son protectively into her side.

"I-I'm Richard Castle, my daughter Alexis is friends with your son," Castle explained and pointed at the little redhead, who had decided it was her turn to be shy now. She hid halfway behind her father and gave the tall brunette in front of her a quick wave.

The woman seemed relieved by that and gave the Castle's a warm smile. "I'm glad to hear that. I'm Kate by the way."

Castle shook her extended hand, but before he could start a conversation, Kate looked down at her watch and then gave him an apologizing look. "It was nice meeting you, but we really need to get going." With that, Kate took Louis' hand and quickly led him out of the schoolyard.

Castle mirrored her actions and slowly began the walk home with his daughter by his side.

"She was so pretty!" Alexis exclaimed after a couple of minutes of walking in silence, astonishment sparkling in her bright blue eyes as she looked up at her father.

"She was," Castle agreed. "We should invite them over for a play date sometime soon."

"Are you saying that because you want me to have someone to play with or because she is a cop and you want to ask her all kinds of weird questions for your next book?" Alexis narrowed her eyes at him in suspicion before grinning widely. She knew her father just a little too well.

"What makes you think that? I'd never!" Castle replied with mock hurt, grasping at his chest in an overly dramatic gesture that his mother, a broadway actress, would have been proud of.

"You totally scared away Lizzie's mom with your questions about undetectable poisons. Lizzie isn't even allowed to sit next to me anymore in class!"

"You know I'm sorry about that. I just didn't know anyone else who has a major in chemistry and would know that kind of stuff," Castle explained, a little frustrated. He really hadn't thought that an innocent question like that would get him into so much trouble. For weeks, all the parents from his daughter's school had avoided him like the plague and warned their children about playing with Alexis.

"Just don't scare Louis' mom away," Alexis huffed. "Louis is really nice."

"Hey, I'm the cool dad, remember?" he grinned at her, winking playfully but Alexis simply giggled and he didn't know whether to take that as confirmation or not. But he was the cool dad, really!

XXX

At the same time, Kate slipped behind the steering wheel of her Crown Victoria and took a few calming breaths. She just met Richard Castle, her favorite author of all times! At her son's school of all places! She took a quick glance in the rearview mirror and groaned inwardly when she saw the bags under her eyes and her disheveled hair.

Not only had she not known what to say to him and fled from the school like an idiot, she also looked like she hadn't slept properly in days - which, unfortunately, was true.

No matter how tired or exhausted she was, she simply had a hard time falling asleep at night. The guilt ate her up alive. The guilt she always felt when she wasn't home in time for dinner, when she wasn't home to put her son to bed, when she was late again picking him up from school because, much like today, she lost track of time trying to figure out the puzzle on the murder board in front of her.

Being a single mom to a 6-year old and a Detective with the NYPD was harder than she had ever imagined it being.

Sighing, she started the car and pulled away from the curb. She needed to drop her son off at home, where his nanny was waiting, before going back to work.

"So, tell me about Alexis," she asked. "Did the two of you play together?"

"We just talked," Louis told her, looking out of the window. Kate was glad to hear that. She knew how shy Louis was, especially around strangers, and how hard it was for him to open up and engage with other children his age.

"What did you talk about?"

"Mostly school. She is in third grade and knows all about the night sky. She told me about constellations that are shaped like animals. Is that true, mommy? Do they exist?"

"I don't know, but we could go to the planetarium this weekend and take a look at all the constellations and find out. Would you like that?"

Louis gave her one of his rare smiles and nodded shyly.

"Alright then," she smiled back at him. "It's settled. We're going to the planetarium on Saturday."


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. **

**Chapter 2**

The following Saturday Richard Castle was woken up by his overly-excited daughter jumping on his bed.

"Wake up, daddy, wake up!" she called, arms stretched out to the sides to help balance herself on the bouncy bed.

"Time 's it?" Castle answered sleepily and lifted his face from the pillow, squinting at his daughter in the early morning light that filtered through his window.

"It's already past 8!" Alexis dropped onto her knees next to him, jostling him.

"What do you mean 'already'? It's _only_ past 8 and way too early to get up," he grumbled and dropped his head back onto the pillow.

Alexis started shaking his shoulder. "Don't fall asleep again! You need to make breakfast. Quick! So we can leave!" When that didn't work, she sat down on her father's back and started tickling his sides.

"Not fair!" Castle whined and tried to wiggle free of his daughter's hold without either of them falling out of the bed.

"If I stop, will you get up and make breakfast?" Alexis tried to negotiate, wriggling her fingers to demonstrate she'd start tickling him again if he wouldn't.

"Fine," Castle surrendered.

Alexis quickly jumped off the bed and pulled the blanket out of her father's reach, making him protest loudly.

"Just making sure", she grinned cheekily before sauntering off to the kitchen, leaving a freezing and moody Castle behind in his bed.

He followed her shortly after, rubbing the sleep from his eyes while trying to tame his hair, which was sticking up in every direction.

"How do waffles and orange juice sound?" he suggested as he found Alexis perched at the kitchen counter with an expectant look on her face.

"They take too long to make. Can't we just have some cereal?"

"You are no fun at all," Castle grumbled and shook his head at his daughter who had already grabbed the milk from the fridge.

20 minutes later, Alexis stood by the front door, dressed in a pair of jeans and a grey print sweater, impatiently tapping her little foot.

"Daddy, what's taking you so long?" she called.

"I'm coming, I'm coming!" he called back, a little annoyed now.

Together they rode the lift to the lobby, greeted the doorman and hailed a cab.

"I can't wait to tell you about all the planets in our universe," Alexis told him, as they entered the planetarium.

Together they made their way through the various show rooms, stopping dead in their tracks every couple of minutes in wonder of what is displayed in front of them.

Every now and then Alexis pointed to something she recognized from school and Castle told her as much as he knew about the various constellations, planets and stars. He was amazed at how much his eight-year-old daughter had picked up in class, and in the end, she had probably taught him more than he had her.

After a couple of hours, they slowly made their way to the exit.

"Are you hungry, Alexis?" Castle asked, always hoping for a chance to eat out in one of New York's many restaurants and diners.

"A little," the girl admitted.

"Good, because I know a place where we could go. They make great sandwiches," he told her, just when something caught his eye and he stopped walking.

"What is it?" Alexis asked, when he suddenly disappeared from her side.

"Do you see that woman right there? Isn't that Kate, Louis' mom?" Castle pointed discreetly to the other side of the room where a woman in a dark blue sweater and a thick head of shoulder-length curls stood with her back to them. Castle would recognize those caramel-colored curls with a hint of gold and brown anywhere, he was a writer, he was supposed to notice and remember the details.

"It is! Let's go say hi!" Before Castle could reply, Alexis grabbed his hand and pulled him over to where the tall brunette was standing, holding her son's hand.

XXX

Kate was currently reading one of the info texts, when her son suddenly released her hand and turned around. When she turned her head to figure out what had caught his attention, she practically had to force air down her lungs at the sight of Richard Castle being pulled towards them by his energetic daughter.

She glanced down at her jeans and simple v-neck sweater and self-consciously ran a hand through her curls in a feeble attempt to tame them.

"Hi Louis!" Alexis said with a large grin when she finally reached them.

"Hi Alexis", Louis smiled shyly.

"What a surprise to see you here", Castle said with a smile, directing his gaze at Kate.

"Louis wanted to know more about stars and planets, after Alexis told him what she had learned in class," Kate responded with a small smile of her own.

"That's kind of, why we are here, too," Castle laughed. "She hasn't stopped talking about it ever since she learned about it in school. She's been bugging me to take her here for days now."

"And this place is so cool!" Alexis exclaimed.

"We like it too, don't we, Louis?" Kate tried to engage her son into their conversation. But the shy boy simply nodded.

"It is pretty amazing," Castle agreed. "But actually, we were just on our way to get lunch. You wouldn't like to join us, would you?", he asked kindly, a faint glimmer of hope crossing his features.

"Uh ... I- I don't -," Kate was left a little dumbfounded by his offer and didn't know what to say.

"Please, please, please!" Alexis had literally folded her hands together in front of her and was jumping up and down, looking at both, Kate and Louis with large, blue eyes and Kate found it hard to resist those sparkling blue eyes.

"We could go to that burger place with the huge playground," Alexis continued, and looking at Louis, she added, "They have this really long slide, you will love it!" Turning to her dad, she pleaded once more, "Can we please go, daddy?"

"That's really up to Kate and Louis, Pumpkin." Kate saw the somewhat stern look Castle gave his daughter and Alexis immediately tempered her excitement down a little and stopped bouncing up and down.

Kate looked at the little girl with the hopeful expression on her face and at her father, who softly smiled at her. Looking down at her son, she saw his wishful expression and who was she to deny him a play date with such a cheerful little girl? Thinking back, she couldn't remember his last play date anyway. He had never had many of them, or friends in general, due to his introverted personality.

"Feel like having burgers for lunch?", she asked him and nudged his shoulder playfully.

"Can I have a cheeseburger?" Louis asked back.

"They have the best cheeseburgers! Daddy always has one," Alexis told them, her hands still folded together.

"Let's go then." Kate grabbed Louis' hand and started walking towards the entrance while Alexis did a small victory dance.

"If you keep jumping up and down like that, there's no desert for you, young lady," Castle made another attempt to get his daughter to calm down a little. Shooting Kate an apologizing look, he added, "She usually isn't this energetic, I have no idea what has gotten into her today."

"I don't mind. It's kind of fun to watch," she reassured him with a quick smile.

As they made their way to the 'cool burger place with the playground', Kate couldn't help thinking how surreal this day was. She was having lunch with Richard Castle and his daughter! She just hoped she wouldn't make a total fool of herself. Unconsciously, she gripped Louis' hand a little tighter. When he turned his head towards her and gave her a beaming smile, she knew this was the right thing to do. She was glad her son had met the joyful, little girl, and in secret, she hoped the redhead could coax him out of his shell.

They chose a booth in the back of the diner and the adults sat opposite each other. After placing their orders, Alexis was already on her way out of the booth but Castle grabbed her by the back of her sweater and pulled her back.

"Alexis, the food will be here any moment. Can't you wait another couple of minutes?"

"Fine," the little girl huffed and crossed her arms in front of her chest. "But after lunch I'm going to the playground, there's no holding me back." Determination was written all over her face and Kate let out a little laugh. Alexis was simply adorable, even more so when she had her mind set on something. Castle shot her a questioning glance but she just mouthed 'later' at him.

The burgers arrived and everyone dug in. After his first bite, Louis grinned at Castle, who mumbled a "good, huh?" around a mouthful of his burger.

"We don't speak with our mouths full, daddy!" Alexis scolded him and Kate took a quick sip of her ice tea to hide her grin. The two of them really were quite comical and she knew exactly who wore the breeches in the Castle household.

When everyone had finally finished eating, Alexis jumped out of the booth with a "see you later daddy", followed by a "hurry, Louis!" and off they were. Alexis practically sprinted to the playground, which could easily be seen from the booth where Kate and Castle remained seated, and Louis followed in a slow jog.

Castle watched the two of them and shook his head, laughing softly. "How did you get him to be so calm and well-mannered? Alexis is such a whirlwind, especially when she is excited about something. She's just untamable."

"I like it. It's delightful to watch. Refreshing even, to see that much unbridled joy and happiness." And with a slightly wistful glance at Louis, who was currently on the slide, she added, "I sometimes wish, he was a little more open."

"He really is quite shy, isn't he?"

When Kate nodded, Castle continued, "I'm sure he'll get there. When Alexis was little, she was the shyest girl ever. It took her incredibly long to warm up to someone. In the beginning she would even refuse to stay with her grandmother for a couple of hours, even though she has been a part of her life from the very beginning."

"Alexis is doing a really good job of getting him to open up a little, though, just look at that." With a soft smile Kate pointed over to the playground where Alexis was currently on the monkey bars, with Louis cheering her on and clapping loudly.

They continued making small talk until Alexis returned to their booth to take a quick sip of her orange juice, looking utterly spent.

"Are you having fun, Alexis?" Kate asked the little girl.

"Yeah, Louis is awesome to play with. Did you see how he mastered the monkey bars and how high he is going on the swings?" Alexis replied, still a little breathless from playing outside. "I can't even do that and I'm two years older!"

"I'm glad you two are getting along so well," Kate told her and got a smile from Alexis in return.

"Are you two getting along, too?" Alexis wanted to know, giving Castle a suspicious look. "He isn't asking you any weird questions, is he?" she worried and looked at Kate.

"Alexis! I promised I wouldn't," Castle huffed.

"Just making sure, because you don't always listen to what I say," the little girl replied, crinkling her nose and setting her glass on the table. And with a quick "love you" over her shoulder, she was gone again.

"What was that all about?" Kate laughed.

"You know, I'm a writer, right?"

The way she suddenly couldn't look him in the eye anymore, probably told him everything he needed to know. If she had just confirmed his suspicions that she was a fan, he thankfully didn't dwell on it. Instead, he went on with his explanation.

"Apparently, some people are put off by the _totally_ reasonable questions I ask them for research." He told her the story of Lizzie's mom, the one with the major in chemistry, who had practically fled the room with her daughter after he had wanted to know in detail what kinds of poisons could not be detected in an autopsy.

"And since she knows that I find police work interesting, she was afraid I might scare you off as well," he ended his little story with a sheepish expression.

Kate was laughing, hard. And boy, did it feel good. She couldn't remember the last time she had had this much fun. By now, all the anxiety she had felt before entering the diner was gone. Richard Castle was a very down-to-earth man and was easy to be with. She found it easy to share some stories of her own everyday life with him and he was quick to return the favor, telling her about the redheaded whirlwind.

"Well, if you ever do have a question, you should give me a call." She slid one of her cards across the table. "And you won't scare me off, don't worry," she winked.

"Promise?" Castle asked and actually looked a little unconvinced before pocketing her card.

"Promise," Kate laughed, while mentally, she was slapping herself. Did she really just flirt with him? And told him to call her?! What was wrong with her? First she is being all weird and barely opens her mouth and now she flirts - bluntly flirts - with him?

But before it could get awkward, Alexis and Louis were sauntering back to their table. Alexis slid into the booth and leaned heavily against Castle's side while Louis downed his apple juice, a few strands of his hair sticking to his sweaty forehead.

Kate lazily slid her hand through her son's hair. "Are you two finally tired?"

They both nodded. "I'm even too tired for ice cream," Alexis admitted.

"What about you, Louis, do you want some ice cream?", Castle asked the tired boy, who simply shook his head.

"Kate?"

"No, thank you, I'm good," she replied.

"Unbelievable," Castle huffed. "I'll go take care of the bill then, so we can get the two of you home." He lovingly nudged Alexis' shoulder.

When Kate moved to slide out of the booth, he motioned for her to keep sitting. "My treat," and before Kate could protest, he was gone.

They left the restaurant together and said goodbye a little awkwardly. Louis clung to his mother's hand, Castle had picked up Alexis, who could barely keep her eyes open anymore, and after Kate had expressed her gratitude, neither really knew what to say, so after a quick handshake around the two children, they parted in opposite directions.

Back home, Kate led Louis over to the couch and turned on the TV. Usually, she was very strict about her son watching a lot of TV, but she just needed some time to herself and sort out her thoughts.

Thinking back to their lunch date, she still couldn't quite believe what had happened. She had had lunch with Richard Castle, the man whose books helped her cope with her mother's death. Running a hand over her face she prayed she hadn't said anything too stupid or made a total fool of herself. She also hoped he had had as good a time as she had had because her son had really opened up while playing with Alexis. She would hate to see the friendship of the two children suffer because Richard Castle thought she was a total weirdo.

"Mommy?" she heard Louis call for her from the living room.

"What is it, Tiger?" she asked, as she made her way back into the living room.

"Today was really nice," he told her with a shy smile. "Alexis and Rick are fun."

She sat down on the couch beside him and ruffled his hair. "I'm glad you had a good time. Maybe we could go and watch a movie with them sometime, what do you think?"

"I'd like that," he replied and leaned into her side.

"_Finding Nemo_ was just released, and according to the reviews I read, it's a really funny movie. It's about a little fish who gets separated from his dad and on his journey back home he makes a lot of new friends. Does that sound good?"

"It does! Can we see it?" he asked with an excited sparkle in his eyes.

"Why don't you ask Alexis next time you see her?" Kate suggested gently.

"Do you think she'll say yes?" Worry washed over Louis' features.

Gently rubbing his back, Kate tried to encourage him. "Of course she will, she's your friend and the two of you had such a good time today."

Sighing, the boy hid his face in his mother's side. It was so hard for him to walk up to someone and start a conversation, or worse, ask for something.

"I know it's hard, Tiger, but you know Alexis, she'd never make fun of you. Just give it a try, alright?" she tried to convince him.

She felt him nod into her side and gave him a little squeeze.

"I know you can do it," she said and pressed a kiss to his head. When she glanced at her watch and saw that it was almost time for dinner, she nudged Louis shoulder to get his attention. "What do you want for dinner today?"

"Can we have pasta?" he asked with his most charming smile.

"With spinach?"

At that, the little boy crinkled his nose.

"Fine," Kate gave in. "I'll make a tomato sauce, but with carrot sticks in it."

XXX

At the same time, Castle and Alexis were having a similar discussion at the loft.

"Daddy, we already had burgers today, we can't have tacos! That's too much junk food in one day," the little girl told him sternly.

"But Alexis," her father whined, "Tacos are not junk food."

"Yes, they are," the stubborn redhead replied.

Suddenly, Castle had an idea. "Oh, so you want something healthy? Something really healthy?" Castle asked teasingly and opened the door to the fridge. "Alright, I'm totally in the mood for stuffed eggplants."

"Eww, no dad, not that healthy!" Alexis exclaimed and shuddered visibly. She hated eggplants.

Castle laughed and gave her shoulder a quick squeeze. "I think we have some leftover lasagna. Sound good?"

"Sounds great."

While Castle reheated the lasagna, Alexis set the table.

"Did you have fun today, Pumpkin?" Castle wanted to know halfway through dinner.

"I did. Especially on the playground with Louis. After a couple of minutes he wasn't that shy anymore and he told me some of the things he had learned at the planetarium. Some things I didn't even know."

Castle knew what she was talking about. He had witnessed the transformation through the glass doors of the diner. The first couple of minutes Louis had just watched what Alexis did and had only nodded or shaken his head for an answer, but after a couple of minutes he had tried some of the equipment himself and commented on Alexis' way of making it through the jungle gym. He had caught the two of them chatting and laughing animatedly quite a few times. But Louis' transformation was not the only one he had witnessed today. Throughout the day Kate had opened up to him. He had seen the way she insecurely tried to smooth out her hair and he had also seen the hesitancy in her eyes when he had asked her to join them for lunch. To say he was stunned when she had given him her card was an understatement, he really hadn't seen it coming. But he was glad he had gotten a glimpse of that less guarded and more playful side of her. Smiling, he replayed his memory of her laughing in his brain. He had fallen in love with her laugh the first time he had heard it, and he couldn't help it, but he was utterly fascinated by Kate. Not only because she was pretty, as Alexis had pointed out quite a few times, but also because the few hours he had spent in her company were _real. _She knew who he was, yet she didn't act on it. Didn't throw herself at him or flirt with him shamelessly, as the majority of women he meets on a regular basis do. Instead they had talked about their children, shared funny stories and had had a really great, effortless lunch. He liked it and he wanted more of it.

His daughter's sustained "Daaad?" brought him back to earth.

"Sorry, Pumpkin, what did you say?"

"I said," she gave him a pointed look for not listening, "We should have lunch with them again."

"We should," Castle agreed. "I'll talk to Kate next time I see her. Now, help me clear the table?"

Alexis got up from her chair and started carrying the plates into the kitchen.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything.**

**Author's Note: Thank you for reading and leaving such kind comments, they make me smile!**

**Chapter 3**

The closer she got to her son's school, the more nervous she got. It was silly, really, and she knew it, but she had had such a good time on Saturday and just hoped that things, for whatever reason, weren't awkward between the two of them.

She parked her Crown Victoria near the school building and as soon as she got out, she saw him. He was standing outside the gate, with his hands in his pockets and a striped scarf wound around his neck to protect him from the cold November breeze.

Her heels must have signaled her arrival because Castle turned towards her and gave her a quick grin.

"Hey Kate."

"Hi Castle," she replied, with a shy smile.

"Remind me to never again be on time to pick up my child, I've been waiting for almost ten minutes and she is nowhere to be seen," he grumbled, easily picking up where they have left two days ago. "She probably can't tear herself away from her friends again. Only last week she was almost fifteen minutes late because she and a friend had started a drawing together and needed to get it finished that day."

Kate was glad he did most of the talking, that way she didn't have to try and come up with something smart to say and could just observe him.

Castle's rambling was interrupted by a cheerful "Hi daddy," and as Alexis went to hug her father, Louis flung his arms around Kate's waist.

"Hey Tiger, how was school?" she asked him, hugging him back.

Before Louis could reply, though, Alexis' joyful voice interrupted them again. "Guess what daddy, Louis asked if we wanted to go and see 'Finding Nemo' together! Can we go please, please, please?"

Hearing this, Kate gave her son a kiss on the head and murmured a silent "I'm so proud of you" to him. The look on his face made her heart swell with love for her little boy. He was just as proud of himself as she was of him.

"Well, if Louis invited us, of course we'll go!" Castle replied with a grin.

"Can we go tomorrow?" Alexis asked the two adults hopefully.

"I'm sorry Alexis, but I'm afraid I have to work tomorrow," Kate responded with a wistful look on her face and felt terrible when the girl's face fell slightly.

"We could go on your next day off, mommy," Louis suggested.

"That would be next Monday. Does that work for you guys?" Kate shot Castle a questioning look.

"Next Monday - November 17th?" Castle calculated and checked with her if that was the date she meant.

Kate nodded.

"Sounds perfect," Castle smiled.

"Perfect?!" Alexis said, exasperated. "That's a full week from today!"

Nibbling her bottom lip, Kate gave Castle an apologizing look. But before she could say anything and cheer the girl up a little, Castle put his arm around Alexis' shoulders and gave them a squeeze. "Now Alexis, a week isn't that bad. We could go to the library tomorrow and get you some books, that way you'll have something to pass the time. How does that sound?"

"Good, I guess, but still, this week can't go by fast enough!" The little girl made a dramatic gesture with her hands before crossing her arms and pushing her lower lip out a little.

Kate had to hide the grin that threatened to spill free, the little redhead really was quite a handful.

As she bid the Castles goodbye she had to admit though, that the little girl was right. This week couldn't possibly go by fast enough. She was looking forward to going to the movies. She couldn't even remember the last time she had been there and the cheerful and honest nature of the Castles did wonders to her soul. Even the quick encounter in front of the school had put a smile on her face, on a day that had so far been filled with the unpleasant encounter of a floater. That was quite the accomplishment.

XXX

Monday finally came round and Castle found himself almost jogging to Alexis' school. When he finally arrived, a little out of breath, Kate was already waiting for him.

"Hey Castle, everything alright?" she asked, smirking.

"Hey, yeah, just lost track of time," he replied, trying to catch his breath while doing his best to still radiate some dignity.

They continued chatting and Castle enjoyed how utterly relaxed Kate seemed. She was joking and smiling all throughout their conversation.

When the two children finally arrived, they hailed a cab and he gave the driver the address of the movie theater. Castle paid the fare, something that didn't go unnoticed by Kate, and while Castle listed the different kinds of candy he was going to buy, Kate bought four tickets.

Castle tried to protest, but Kate cut him off. "You paid for lunch last time, this is the least I can do," she explained. "Fair's fair."

"Alright, but I am paying for the snacks and drinks." Looking at Louis he asked, "Have you decided what you want to have yet?"

The boy looked up at him and pointed at the bag of M&Ms.

"Okay, what else?"

Both, Louis and Kate shot him confused glances.

"You can't be serious! We are at the movies, you can't have just one tiny bag of candy! Each of you, choose at least three," he ordered, determined to show them what it meant to go to the movies with a Castle.

"Three?!" Louis' eyes lit up.

And before his mother could interfere, he pointed at the display cabinet. "Can I have M&Ms, a butterfinger and gummyworms?"

"Coming right up," Castle smiled at him, glad to hear the boy finally talking a little more.

After convincing Kate to also choose 3 different kinds of candy, they finally made their way into the movie hall and found their seats. Alexis and Louis sat sandwiched between Castle and Kate.

"If you get scared, just grab my hand," Castle whispered towards his daughter who just shook her head.

"I'm not a baby anymore, daddy, and this movie isn't very scary."

Castle interrupted the silence twice more during the movie, only to be quieted by his daughter every time.

To keep her laughter at bay, Kate quickly snatched a couple of M&Ms from her son let them melt on her tongue.

When the ending credits finally rolled over the large screen, Castle was thoroughly happy. The movie had been funny and he had had an entertaining afternoon in great company.

That is, until they reached the exit of the movie theater. He saw how Louis suddenly started tugging on Kate's arm and she was immediately worried when she looked down at him.

"Tiger, what's wrong?" Kate asked and crouched down.

"We didn't sing," Louis replied, his bottom lip quivering and Alexis sent him a helpless look but Castle was just as clueless as she was.

Kate pulled Louis into a hug. "That's alright, we have had a great afternoon so far, haven't we? That's just as good as singing."

Curiosity finally got the better of Alexis. "Sing? Why would we sing?"

"Because it's mommy's birthday," Louis replied, on the verge of tears.

"What?" Alexis and Castle squeaked at the same time and before Kate could start explaining, Alexis sprinted forward and threw her arms around her waist before looking up at her shyly. "Happy birthday, Kate."

Somewhat timid, Castle too, pulled her into a quick hug and wished her a happy birthday. He noticed how she stiffened slightly and he kept the hug brief. She was obviously not a fan of PDA and a little uncomfortable.

"Thank you," she replied. "But honestly, it's no big deal." Castle knew she hoped the topic was off the table now, but Alexis had a different idea.

"We should have some cake, daddy!"

"Pumpkin, maybe Kate and Louis have other plans", he told her while looking at Kate, giving her an out.

"Louis and I planned on having pizza. But I guess you could join us, if you are free. What do you think, Louis?" she looked down at her son who was still on the edge of tears and he nodded.

"Birthday pizza is just as cool!" Alexis exclaimed cheerfully and together they made their way to a little diner.

After everyone had a large slice of pizza in front of them and Kate had argued them out of singing 'happy birthday' to her, Castle finally saw her relax again.

XXX

After reluctantly letting Castle pay for their pizza, "It's your birthday, this is the least I can do," they started the long walk home together. Kate and Castle were talking amicably, while Alexis and Louis were walking a few feet ahead of them. Every once in a while, Alexis would turn around and smile shyly at Kate, who would smile back at her.

"She really likes you," Castle told her honestly.

"I like her too," she responded. "She's such a sweet, little girl." Of course she had noticed the way Alexis looked at her. It was silly, but Kate felt a sense of pride, every time the little girl looked up at her, totally in awe. Nobody had looked at her like that for a very long time.

"Listen," Kate started hesistantly, "I wanted to properly thank you for today and also for last time. Louis and I had a truly great time and I'm sure you are usually very busy, being an author and all, so I just wanted you to know that I really appreciate the fact that you chose to spend time with us."

"It's not a problem Kate, not at all. Alexis and I are glad that we got to hang out with you. I may be a writer, but first and foremost I'm a dad. And seeing how much Alexis is enjoying herself when she is around you and Louis makes it easy to make time."

Kate released the breath she didn't realize she had been holding. Since first meeting the Castles she had been truly concerned whether or not they enjoyed themselves as much as she did.

"This might creep you out a little, but I mean it in the nicest possible way," Castle continued, grinning, "I like spending time with you, Kate. In my profession you don't meet a lot of women that are ... _real_, if you know what I mean? Talking to you is refreshing."

At that, Kate let out a laugh. "The feeling's mutual, Castle."

"Why do you always call him Castle?" Alexis all of a sudden piped up.

"It's a cop thing, I guess," Kate said with a smile in Castle's direction.

"I like it, it sounds cool." Castle waggled his eyebrows playfully before coming to a stand on a street corner. "Well, this is where Alexis and I have to turn right."

Was that disappointment Kate saw in his eyes? At least, that feeling was mutual too.

"Well, get home safe," she said with a smile.

"Shouldn't that be my line?" Castle smirked, amused that it was the girl telling the boy to get home safely instead of the other way round.

"I'm a cop, remember? I know how to use my gun," she said, a little dryly but still friendly.

"My apologies," he grinned, his hand lifted in a gesture of surrender.

Kate grinned back at him, holding his gaze for maybe a second too long before the impatient honk of a car in the distance made her blink and the moment was gone.

"Thank you again for today," she said quickly, trying to prevent an awkward silence. "I'm sure we'll see you soon."

"I sure hope so."

Kate nodded her agreement, grabbed Louis' hand, waved at them again and turned left, happy to the core.


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything.**

**Author's Note: Totally overwhelmed with the response this story has gotten!**

**Chapter 4**

"Good morning, kiddos!" Martha Rodgers announced herself as she opened the door to her son's loft using her spare key. Dressed in a variety of bright colors, like always, the actress made her way into the kitchen where her granddaughter sat at the counter with a bowl of cereal in front of her.

"Grams!" The younger redhead quickly climbed off the barstool and threw herself into her grandmother's awaiting arms.

"Morning Mother," Martha was greeted much less enthusiastically by her son, who was currently slicing an apple for Alexis' lunch.

"Someone seems to be in a good mood," the older woman noted sarcastically and sat down on the barstool next to Alexis.

"Paula forced him to attend a charity event tonight," Alexis informed her grandmother, scooping up the last of her cereal.

"That agent knows what's good for you. You haven't made a public appearance since -"

"Since Gina, I know," Castle quickly cut in, less than thrilled to be reminded about his last failed relationship yet again.

Luckily, Alexis chose that moment to declare she had to go brush her teeth and left the two adults alone in the kitchen.

"Well, you have to go out there eventually at some point and you have always loved charity events. What seems to be the problem?"

"It's just not ...," Castle ran a hand through his hair in frustration, "very appealing anymore. I've gotten so tired of all that forced small-talk and the falsity of those people. Every event is the same and all the people are the same. Do you know what I mean?"

His mother nodded understandingly. As an actress on Broadway she had had her fair share of those events and is very well acquainted with the people that attend them.

"And the worst part is, if I go there by myself, all these women will be throwing themselves at me."

"You know, there was a time where you enjoyed that," Martha reminded him with raised eyebrows. "Actually, I recall reading quite a few articles on Page Six-"

"That was years ago, mother," Castle interrupted her, not keen on hearing about a more reckless phase of his life where he lived a lot more carelessly than he does now. "You know I'm not that guy anymore."

"True that. Well then, what about a date?", Martha suggested, as always trying to hook him up with someone.

"I wouldn't know who to ask," Castle admitted. "I want someone real, someone who I can have an actual conversation with, someone who is not from _that _world. I've made that mistake twice, right now I want something different."

Martha knew he was referring to his ex-wife, and mother of his daughter, and ex-fiancée, and sadly, she had to agree with him. Both relationships had not been meant to work out.

"What about that girl you have been talking non-stop about? What was her name? Katherine?" seeing her son nod in confirmation, she continued, "Why don't you ask her out?"

"I'd love to, but we're not quite there yet. What I have with Kate is different, it's important, and I can't mess it up." Castle finished preparing Alexis' lunch and placed his ellbows on the counter to be at eye level with his mother. "Sometimes I feel like I've known her for ever, but then again, sometimes I discover something knew about her and feel like I don't know her at all. Which is probably true," he added with a regretful sigh. "She's just so very multifaceted, so mysterious, and I need to not mess this up," Castle told his mother with determination. "I want to get it right this time."

Martha regarded her son with curiosity. He'd seldom been this smitten by someone and talked about someone with such passion. In fact, she could only recall one other situation like this. Kyra Blaine. The one who got away. The one woman she had thought of as the right one for her son. Until she had decided that she needed space all of a sudden and booked a flight to London that is.

Her thoughts were interrupted by tiny sock-clad feet rushing down the stairs. "Let's go daddy!"

Waving his mother goodbye, Castle took Alexis' hand and started the short walk to her school.

What he had told his mother was the truth. He'd love for Kate Beckett to join him that evening, but something told him she was a woman with a story. By the way she guards herself, it must be a very painful story. He wanted to take his time with her. Get to know her, be there for her. He didn't dare to think about anything beyond that, yet, but he would settle for just being a friend to her, if that meant she would laugh a little more often.

"Hey daddy?" Alexis tried to get his attention by pulling his hand.

"Yes?"

"If you are going to that charity event tonight, who is going to watch me?" the girl wanted to know.

"I gave Katrina a call." When Alexis didn't reply but stared straight ahead, he grew a little worried. "You like her, don't you?"

"Katrina's nice. But I like you better," she told him earnestly. Castle knew, she had never liked to be babysat by strangers, but sometimes he just couldn't do anything about it. Attending publicity events and parties were a part of his job and his mother wasn't always available.

"I certainly hope so," Castle told her with a dramatic gesture that made her giggle. Turning serious again, he looked down at her. "It's just one night Pumpkin, do you think you can manage?"

"Yeah, I'm a big girl now, remember?" she reminded him with a proud gleam to her eyes.

"You are." He moved to give her a kiss on the forehead, but the slender girl quickly took two steps back.

"Not in front of the school, daddy, I told you!" she reminded him, annoyance seeping through her voice.

Right. Big girl.

"Sorry, sorry," Castle held up his hands in surrender. "Have fun in school today, Pumpkin, and be good!", he called after her, as she sprinted through the front gate of the school and into the yard towards a small group of little girls.

XXX

It was barely past midnight when he returned back to his loft. After paying Katrina, the young babysitter, he poured himself a glass of scotch and settled down on the couch in his office. The evening had been just as he had expected it to be. He had put on a fake smile, engaged with people and flirted back shamelessly, making sure the press got a good glimpse of it. The last thing he needed right now was tabloids stating he was a broken man after his failed relationship with Gina Cowell, his publisher and for the past few months also his ex-fiancée. No, he needed to preserve his image. Richard Castle, famous author and playboy extraordinaire, that's who he was. At least in the papers. Sure, there had been a stage in his life, after Meredith had divorced him, where he had tried to choke his feelings in meaningless one-night stands and parties, but he had quickly realized that two-year-old Alexis needed stability in her life and he needed to find a different way to cope. For years now, he had been different, had even been with Gina for more than a year, but the image of the playboy stuck with him, and Paula, his agent, expected him to act the part, since it did wonders for book sales.

Sighing, he hoped that the people that mattered, Kate included, knew to look deeper, see his image for what it is - just an image - and give him a chance to show them the real him.

Downing the rest of his scotch, he stood and slowly went up the stairs to check on his daughter. Tiptoeing into her room, he silently watched the rise and fall of her chest for a few minutes. Once again it struck him, no matter how badly he had messed up his previous relationships, he was still so very, very lucky.


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything.**

**Chapter 5**

It had been a relatively calm morning at the Precinct, that Wednesday morning in early December. After seeing Louis off to school, Kate had carefully maneuvered her Crown Vic through the icy streets of New York and used the slow morning to catch up on some paperwork.

Until she got the call that is. The one call every parent dreads. The 'it's your son, Ms. Beckett' call.

After hearing what had happened, she had dropped everything and basically sprinted out of the Precinct.

Quickly entering the school building, Kate turned to her right where the principal's office was. Through the open door she saw Louis sitting in an uncomfortable looking plastic chair with the school's nurse talking to him soothingly and wrapping his right wrist in a bandage. With his head bowed and his shoulders slumped the little boy was the perfect picture of misery. When he spotted his mother in the doorway, he wrestled his wrist free from the nurse's hold and ran towards her, tears running down his cheeks.

"Mommy," he sobbed quietly into Kate's shoulder after she picked him up and held him tightly.

"It's okay Louis, I'm here now, everything's fine," she tried to soothe him.

After Louis had calmed down a little, the nurse made her way over to Kate and told her how the little boy had slipped during recess and sprained his wrist and bumped his head. After reassuring Kate that he did not have a concussion, just a nasty bump, and giving a few last instructions, Kate thanked the nurse and slowly carried her son to her car to drive him home.

Back at home she called her Precinct to let the Captain know that she had to take the rest of the day off, while Louis clung to her side, seeking her comfort.

She pulled him into her lap and started to rock them from side to side. The calming movement was as much for her sake as for Louis'. She was probably just as startled as he was.

"Does it hurt, baby?" she asked Louis who had, yet again, tears in his eyes.

He nodded into her shoulder and let out a little whimper.

"Let me get you some ice." Kate carefully scrambled out from under him. "And what do you say, feel like having a movie marathon?"

Louis' eyes lit up at that. Movie marathons were his favorite part about being sick. He quickly stood to pick out the first movie.

When Kate returned from the kitchen a couple of minutes later, an ice pack, a plate with cookies and a glass of milk in hand, she saw Louis pop _The Lion King _into the DVD player.

They lay snuggled under a blanked together, icing Louis' wrist, when the phone rang, some time halfway through the movie. Groaning, Kate left the comforting warmth of the blanket and stood to get it.

"Beckett," she greeted courtly, her eyes still trained on the TV.

"Kate? It's Rick." This is not who she had expected. At all. What could he possibly want?

"Hi Rick. What's up?"

"Alexis told me Louis injured himself in school today and we just wanted to know how he's feeling?" He actually sounded worried. That sweet, sweet man.

To have a little more privacy and not disturb Louis' movie any further, Kate carried the phone into her bedroom.

"He slipped and sprained his wrist," Kate informed Castle. "He'll be alright, he's just a little in shock at the moment." Much like me, she wanted to add, but didn't.

"We're glad to hear that it's nothing more serious. Poor Louis, this winter is nasty!"

"Yeah, it is ...," Kate replied vaguely. And after a moment of awkward silence she added, "We're currently having a movie marathon, trying to focus on something else, you know? I was thinking ... you and Alexis wouldn't want to maybe join us?" Holy shit, where had that come from? She couldn't possibly invite Richard Castle and his daughter into her home. Her fairly small and currently _very untidy _home. But the words were already out of her mouth and there was no taking them back.

She heard rustling and muffled voices from the other end of the line, before Castle spoke up again. "Actually, we would love to." She could practically hear the smile in his voice.

After giving him her address, she dropped the phone onto her bed and went to grab the vacuum cleaner. Starting in the kitchen and then moving on to the living room, she began to furiously vacuum her apartment. She was so focused on the - sheer impossible - task in front of her, that she didn't hear Louis protesting when the sound of the vacuum cleaner drowned out the ones of his movie.

"Mom!"

When she finally heard him, she looked up, startled, and turned the machine off.

"Mommy, what's going on?" the little boy wanted to know. Because something must clearly be going on in order for his mother to be cleaning this madly.

"Castle and Alexis are coming over to join us for our movie marathon," Kate explained. "Your room is at least somewhat clean, right?"

At that, the boy paled slightly, paused his movie and ran to his room, panicked.

That's what she thought. "Watch your wrist," she called after him, already maneuvering the vacuum around the couch and coffee table in the living room.

Kate sighed when she discocvered that her bookshelf needed to be dusted again. She has never been very good at cleaning and keeping order. Usually, once she was finished with work and Louis was in bed, she is simply so very _tired_ and wants to have the hour or so, before she collapses into bed every night, to herself, doing something she enjoys. Like reading a good book or taking a long, hot shower.

Deciding, the floor was clean enough, she put the vacuum cleaner back into the supply closet and started to wipe down the counters in the kitchen.

That's the position she froze in, when she heard the doorbell ring. Dropping the sponge she had used into the sink and smoothing down her purple sweater, she took a few calming breaths. It's just the Castles, she kept telling herself.

She opened the door zestfully and was greeted with the smiling faces of Castle and Alexis.

"Hi. Come in," she greeted with a nervous smile and stepped aside to let the two of them enter.

Two pairs of blue eyes glanced around and took the small apartment in.

Self-consciously, Kate began to explain, "I'm sorry, this probably isn't what you are used to, I'm sure your apartment is a lot bigger and a lot more-"

Castle must have sensed how unsure she was of herself, because he quickly cut in, "This is great, you have a beautiful home, Kate."

"Yeah, it looks so comfy!" Alexis stated with a bright smile.

Relieved, Kate took their coats and called for Louis, who shortly after appeared.

"Hey Louis, I heard you had quite the day today, huh?", Castle greeted him, his voice sympathetic but still cheerful.

"Look, I made you something." Alexis held out a blue piece of paper covered in glitter. "It's a get-well-soon-card. And it's blue because that's your favorite color."

Louis accepted the card with a shy smile and started to decipher Alexis' still slightly scrawly handwriting.

"Did you make that yourself, Alexis?" Kate asked the girl who seemed to be very proud of herself.

"I did."

"It's beautiful, and so very thoughtful, thank you," she squeezed the girl's shoulder in gratitude and shot Castle a quick smile.

Kate led them over to the couch. "We were just in the middle of _The Lion King_. Do you want to finish that movie or watch something else? We have a few other Disney movies, on that shelf over there," she pointed at a shelf next to the TV, "if you want to check them out, Alexis."

"_The Lion King _is fine, it's a great movie," Alexis stated as she plopped down on the couch. Kate was relieved to see how comfortable the girl was in her home.

"Why don't you guys continue with the movie while I prepare a few snacks?" she suggested.

"Do you want some help?" Castle offered.

"It's fine, I'll join you in a minute." With that, Kate went into the kitchen and grabbed a bowl for some popcorn while Castle sat down on the couch, next to Louis and Alexis.

Ten minutes later, the small coffee table in her living room was covered with snacks. There was popcorn, some gummy bears, nachos, juice and milk.

So much for a healthy diet, Kate thought, as she sat down next to Castle. She had always placed value on a healthy diet, she knew how important it was, especially for children who were still growing, and she made sure Louis always had some kind of fruit or vegetable with every meal.

"Do you want something more healthy? Maybe I should go and slice some apples ...," but before Kate could get up a third time to retrieve something from the kitchen, Castle put a large hand on her thigh to hold her back.

"Relax Kate, this is great," he assured her with a smile. "Just enjoy the movie."

He removed his hand from her thigh and she missed the warmth instantly.

She looked at Louis and Alexis, who were both munching on some popcorn while enjoying the movie, and she finally leaned back into the cushions and let herself relax.

But after a few minutes of silently watching the movie, her thoughts drifted back to what had happened earlier that day. She looked at her son again who was now sporting a blue and purple bump on his forehead. What if it had been a concussion? What if he had broken his wrist? What would have happened if she had had an active case today? She would not have been able to leave just like that. She remembered how frightened the six year old had looked when she had first seen him sitting next to the nurse. He must have been so scared with all these strange people around him. And he must have been in a lot of pain_. _

She tried to shake off those thoughts but she simply couldn't bring her mind to shut up. Great, here she was, watching a movie with her son and two of the very few friends she had, on the verge of tears over a sprained wrist. She took a few calming breaths and waved aside the worried look Castle gave her.

However, the tears were back at a particularly emotional scene towards the end of the movie. It was just too much and she quickly excused herself and fled into her bedroom, closing the door behind her.

XXX

Castle had noticed how she had paled and tensed at some point during the movie and had guessed that something wasn't right. He was proofed right, when she got up and left the room in a hurry. He looked at the two children, who were immersed in the tale of the little lion, and decided to go after her.

He left the living room area and found himself in a small hallway with a total of three doors. Only one of which was closed. He took a moment to gather his thoughts. Was it okay for him to go after her, into her bedroom of all places? Was he overstepping? But when he heard heavy breathing from the other side of the door, just like someone was desperately trying not to burst into tears, his wanting to be there for her overruled all other thoughts.

He gently knocked on the door. "Kate?"

He heard her inhale sharply, but she didn't reply.

"Kate, are you okay?" he tried again.

This time he got a response. "Yeah, I'll be out in a minute."

Her voice was thick with unshed tears and she didn't sound fine at all, so he slowly opened the door and peeked inside. It was simply like him to push and ignore requests. The room he found himself in was her bedroom and she sat on the edge of the bed, with her knees curled up into her chest and her head laid down on top of them.

She didn't look at him when he sat down next to her on the bed, and he had a strong feeling it had something to do with her eyes being red and puffy.

He placed his hand in-between her shoulder blades and began to rub large, soothing circles. "What's wrong, Kate?"

Again, she didn't reply. But she didn't need to, Castle was pretty sure he knew exactly what was going on in her head.

"You know, this one time, when Alexis was about four years old, she slipped on the stairs and fell. Her nose started bleeding and after only a few minutes this nasty bruise on her chin had formed. I panicked. She kept crying, the bleeding wouldn't stop and I didn't know what to do, so we drove to the hospital. The doctors checked her out, her nose stopped bleeding shortly after and the bruise was just a bruise, no concussion or loose teeth. She was going to be just fine. Still, they wanted to keep her there over night, for observation, she did hit her head pretty hard on one of the stairs. I called my mother and asked her to bring a bag for Alexis with her favorite toys. My mother arrived and barely acknowledged the fact that she took a fall down the stairs. Instead they started playing cards on the hospital bed. Alexis was giggling the whole time and won every round of the game. All the while I was feeling terrible. I kept thinking about the_ what ifs?, _until my mother took me aside and told me she was fine and had probably already forgotten about everything. It was true, I was actually more in shock than Alexis herself. I kept hovering until she told me to stop being such a baby." He chuckled at that memory before sobering and continuing, "What I'm saying is, he is fine. Louis is fine. This is what children do. They play outside, they run around, they fall and they slip. This probably won't be the last time, but look at him. He is watching a movie, eating popcorn and entertaining Alexis, by this time tomorrow he won't even remember what really happened today."

At last, Kate looked up. "It's just _so_ hard, you know," she sniffled. "I hate seeing him in this much pain and he looked so frightened when I picked him up. And I can't help wondering, what if I would not have been able to pick him up this fast? What if I had worked a case? I wouldn't have been able to just drop everything and take the rest of the day off. There's no one but me and him." A tear leaked from the corner of her eye and made its way down her cheek.

"There's no one you could call?" Castle was a little shocked by that statement. Surely, there must be _someone_.

Kate shook her head and buried her face in her hands again.

"The next time something like this happens, you call me, okay?" The words had just tumbled out of his mouth before he could stop them.

"What?" Kate looked at him with wide eyes, surprise evident on her face.

"You call me. I will be there, I will always be there," he told her sincerely and gave her a smile.

The tears kept flowing, but she nodded in agreement, and Castle pulled her against his chest. Her hands fisted in his shirt as her tears stained the skin on his shoulder.

After a while the sobs ebbed away and she looked up at him. "I'm sorry I'm such a mess," she apologized and wiped the tears off her cheeks.

"You're not a mess," he told her and pulled away a little. He knew she wasn't a very touchy-feely person and it had taken him by surprise that she allowed him to hug her, but now he didn't want to overdo it and gave her some space.

"And what is it that you call this?" she asked and gestured at herself, her shoulders slumped in defeat.

"Someone who needs a friend after a hard day."

"Is that what we are? Friends?" she asked him, warily.

"I'd like to think so," Castle replied with a warm smile, his head tilted in question. He'd like to think of her as a friend and hoped she'd feel the same way.

Kate nodded at him.

"Okay. I should probably check on the children, the movie has probably ended by now." He moved to get off the bed, but Kate's hand on his wrist held him back.

"Thank you, Castle. I-I needed this; a friend." The look of raw vulnerability and sheer gratitude in her eyes said it all. Just how _badly _she had needed a friend.

"Anytime, Kate. You can always talk to me. And I meant what I said earlier." With that he finally stood and went to check on the children.

XXX

By the time Castle closed the door of her bedroom behind him, Kate's mind was an emotional roller coaster. She still felt slightly pathetic for loosing it in front of Richard Castle, but at the same time she was content. He had understood, he had been there for here and she knew, he would keep his promise of always being there when she needed him.

It felt good to know she had a friend in him. Castle, and Alexis too, were easy to talk to, they respected her wishes and were genuinely interested in what she had to say. She didn't know what it was, but something about their baby blue eyes made her want to tell them more about herself, made her want to spill all her fears and secrets. Especially when Castle directed his gaze at her. Something in the way he looked at her suddenly made her yearn for someone to talk to and she knew, should she decide to fully open up to Castle, to really let him in, that he wouldn't hurt her. The way he looked at her was too honest for that. And that's what she really wanted, she realized all of a sudden, to let someone in, to trust in someone again, thinking of him as a friend was a good start for that.

She stood and went into her bathroom to wash her face and remove it of any remnants of mascara. Not that there were many anymore. She didn't even want to know how Castle's shirt looked. She just hoped Alexis and Louis weren't going to ask about it, this would be hard to explain to them.

She left her bedroom and heard soft voices from the room to her left, Louis' room. She peeked through the open door and saw the two children on the floor building a large ship with _Legos_. She smiled softly at the image.

"What are you two doing?"

"Alexis is helping me build a ship, mommy," Louis explained.

"You two are doing a good job, it looks great!" Looking around the room, she noticed someone was missing. "Alexis, do you know where your dad is?"

"Uh, he said something about preparing dinner? You should probably go and look for him, he sometimes does very stupid things while cooking." The redhead looked a little concerned.

"I'm sure he's fine. I'll go check on him and call you two when dinner's ready, alright?"

With that, Kate left the two of them and went into the kitchen, where Castle was indeed going through her cupboards in search of something edible.

"So, is this something friends do too?" she asked with a raised eyebrow, yanking his chain a little.

"Uhh ... I, sorry, I ... You looked like you needed a minute-"

She decided to put him out of his misery, even though his stuttering was adorable. "It's fine, Castle," she laughed. "It's very thoughtful of you. So, what are we having?"

"Well, I haven't actually found much food yet," he admitted.

"I really need to go grocery shopping. But I know that I have some noodles and the ingredients for a carbonara sauce. Is that something you and Alexis like?"

"Actually the carbonara sauce is my specialty. Just sit back and watch while the master prepares the sauce."

"The master, huh?" Kate chuckled and grabbed the ingredients from the fridge.

"The master," he confirmed with a cocky grin. "You'll see."

Together they whipped up a meal of spaghetti carbonara along with a tomato salad, while Alexis and Louis set the table.

During dinner all four of them chatted amicably, even Louis spoke up a few times and told them about the ship he and Alexis were currently building. His fall and wrist completely forgotten.

After dinner, Castle was reluctant to leave, but both Louis and Alexis were tired and Kate too was ready to go to bed.

"But what about our ship, daddy?" Alexis protested. Apparently, she, too, was reluctant to leave.

"You can finish it another time, come on," Castle held out her coat.

"But daddy," Alexis whined, not going anywhere near the coat.

"You can come back any time you like Alexis," Kate told her.

"Really?" The girl seemed relieved. "Or you can come to our place and we can finish it there! And then I can show you all of my toys," she told Louis with a bright smile, who didn't seem averse to the idea.

"I'm sure we'll figure something out," Castle said while offering Alexis the coat again, and this time she slid her arms through the sleeves.

"Bye Louis, get well soon, and bye Kate, thank you for today, we had a lot of fun."

"We did!" Alexis agreed with her father.

"Thank you for coming and making today fun," Kate told the two Castles. "We'll definitely repeat that."

And with that, they left.


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything.**

**Have you guys recovered from the finale yet? I think I need a few more days ... **

**Chapter 6**

"What time is it, daddy?" Alexis asked for the third time that morning.

"Almost noon. They'll be here any second, Pumpkin," Castle assured his daughter.

It was the weekend before Christmas and they had decided to invite Kate and Louis over to bake cookies together and give the two little ones a chance to finish building their ship. It was probably also the last time they'd see each other this year.

When the doorbell finally rang, Alexis raced over to the door and opened it with enthusiasm.

"Hi Kate! Hi Louis!" she greeted. "Did you bring the ship?"

The boy motioned to his backpack. "I hope it didn't break, but I was real careful on the way over."

Castle finally joined the group.

"Hey guys, come on in," he greeted and ushered them inside. "I'm so glad you could make it."

He took their coats and gave them a minute to adjust to the loft. He knew from experience that people sometimes were a little overwhelmed with the size of his home and there was a lot to take in.

"Your home is so big!" Louis exclaimed with wide eyes.

Kate seemed to agree, judging by the way she looked around with wide eyes. His loft was big. And very stylish. Most of the walls were covered by bookshelves all of which must hold a total of more than a thousand books. He noticed how her gaze fell on the many bookshelves covering his walls. He guessed she'd probably enjoy most of them, they had similar tastes when it came to books. After all, she did admit that she was a fan of his work.

His thoughts were interrupted by Alexis. "Do we start with the cookies now or can Louis and I finish the ship first?"

"Why don't we start with the cookies?" Castle suggested. "We don't know how much time Kate has, she is on call today. Maybe we can finish at least one load of cookies before she and Louis have to leave, so they have some to take home with them? Sound good?"

"What does that mean, you're on call?" Alexis looked at Kate for help.

"It means that when there is a case, they call me and I have to go to the Precinct and help solve it," Kate explained.

"You have to work on weekends?" Alexis couldn't quite believe it.

"Sometimes. But in exchange there will be a day during the week where I don't have to work. So, what do you say, let's start with the cookies?", Kate suggested and Castle led them into his large kitchen, where all the ingredients already sat on the counters.

"Are you up for a baking competition?" Castle challenged Kate and Louis as he grabbed a mixing bowl.

"Baking competition?" Kate was confused.

"We always have one," Alexis explained. "No recipes and scales allowed, you can use all the ingredients on the counter and the first one to have a baking sheet full of cookies that are actually edible," she shot her father a pointed look, who in return pretended not to see, "Is the winner."

"And I feel really sorry for you, Kate," Alexis added as an afterthought. "Because today it's kids versus grown-ups and daddy's cookies are never any good."

"Hey!" Castle protested. "I know _someone _who is not allowed to have any of my cookies," he told her and feigned to be offended by her words.

"Wouldn't want any anyway."

"Fine."

"Fine."

With a last challenging look at his daughter, he gave Kate a spoon and grabbed the container with the sugar.

"Louis? Kate? You ready?"

Seeing them both nod, he opened the container. "May the best team win."

While Kate's idea was to approach the task strategically and roughly estimate the amounts of sugar, flour and butter that they needed for the batter, Castle had other plans. He dumped half of the sugar in the container into the mixing bowl and grabbed four sticks of butter.

"What are you doing? That's way too much sugar!"

"No it's not, it's just fine," Castle defended his actions and kept pouring, just to make a point.

Kate ignored him, grabbed a spoon and scooped some of the sugar out of the bowl while Castle added ridiculous amounts of butter in. She simply shook her head at him and glanced at Alexis and Louis who were whispering as silently as kids could only whisper. She noticed they had two eggs next to their bowl.

"Do you need help with those eggs?" Kate offered.

"No!" Alexis was quick to reply. "You can't come over to our side of the counter."

"Exactly, mommy. No peeking," her son chided her.

Kate put her hands up in surrender and Castle used that moment of her inattentiveness to dump a whole bag of chocolate chips into the bowl. When she saw that, she groaned, but he simply gave her a cheeky grin. You only live once, right?

"Relax Kate, loosen up a little," Castle told her and playfully bumped her shoulder with his.

"Loosen up? You want me to loosen up?" Kate challenged him playfully, while she grabbed a bag of gummy bears that was also sitting on the counter, and dumped it into the batter.

"Ohh, I like the way you think, Detective." Castle grinned and reached for the Oreo cookies.

All of a sudden Louis and Alexis were the mature ones in the kitchen.

After adding about every topping they could think of into their bowl, they blotted it onto a cooking sheet and high-fived each other.

"Finished!"

They turned to look at the two children who stared into their own bowl a little hopelessly.

"I think something went wrong daddy," Alexis admitted, cheeks turning a soft shade of pink.

Castle carefully peeked into their bowl. He was greeted with a very watery, yellow-y substance with clumps in it.

"You think, Alexis?" he snorted. "Did you add flour?"

Together they added flour and started beating the batter and after a couple of minutes it looked a little more like cookie dough.

Unafraid, Castle dipped one finger into the mass and brought it up to his mouth.

"This is ... good," he exclaimed, but Kate, as a mother herself, knew that tone. It meant, it was anything _but_ good.

"You should try it, Kate."

"Yes, mommy, try it, it looks so good!"

She could obviously never deny her son anything, so she too, very carefully dipped one finger into the batter.

"Why so hesitant, Kate?" Castle grabbed her hand and pushed all four of her fingers knuckle-deep into the gooey dough.

She glared at him and he could tell she was probably thinking of a way to get payback, but he only smirked at her.

Trying some of the substance on her fingers, he saw her fight the urge to gag. Something _definitely _went wrong with those cookies.

"This is exceptional. Good job Louis and Alexis!"

While the children looked at each other gleefully, the adults stared at each other, grossed out. Castle gave Kate a paper towel to clean up her fingers and together, the four of them, spread the dough on the baking sheet anyway.

Just as they were about to place the cookies in the oven, Kate's phone rang and she excused herself.

"Was that the Precinct?" Castle asked when she returned to the kitchen.

"Unfortunately. They need me on a case," she told him on a regretful sigh.

"That's too bad, but we understand." He tried to mask his disappointment.

"But what about Alexis' and my ship?" Louis asked. "And the cookies?" He had really been looking forward to spending another day with Alexis.

"The two of you can finish the ship some other time. And we have plenty of cookies at home," she reminded him.

"Uh, well, if you wanted, Louis could stay here," Castle suggested. "That way they can finish their ship and when you pick him up tonight, you can take some of the _exceptional,_" he emphasized that word, "cookies home with you."

"I don't know ... I don't know at what time I get to leave the Precinct tonight." Kate looked a little indecisive when she looked from Castle to Louis and back to Castle again.

"He can stay for dinner and afterwards we'll pop in a movie. It's fine with us, he is welcome to stay for as long as you have to work tonight."

"Would you like to stay here with Rick and Alexis while mommy is at work?", she asked her son, who nodded excitedly.

"It's settled then," Castle smiled cheerfully.

Kate looked at her son again to double-check, but he only nodded vigorously.

"Alright," Kate smiled. "Have fun you two," she waved at the children as she and Castle made their way to his front door. "He's not very good with staying at other places without me. Can you please give me a call if he should start crying or missing me?"

Sensing her hesitancy, he tried to reassure her while helping her into her coat. "I will, but don't worry about him, everything will be fine, he seems to be very at ease." He gave her an encouraging smile, she took another deep breath and stepped out of the doorway.

"See you later then."

"See you later."

XXX

It was just after ten PM when Kate finally knocked on Castle's front door. She had called, of course, and asked whether it was okay for Louis to stay for another couple of hours after dinner or if his babysitter should pick him up, but Castle had insisted he stayed. He also told her how they'd ordered pizza for dinner and that Louis was fine and didn't seem to miss her too much. The phone call had silenced her conscience a little and kept her from worrying too much. Because yes, she had worried about Louis. It wasn't because she left him at Castle's, a man she had only met a few times, but because there weren't many people the shy boy would stay with all by himself. She had no clue why, but she trusted Castle. Something about him and the cheerful little redhead made it easy to do so. Castle was responsible and a great father, Alexis was proof of that. No, she had worried about her little boy and wondered if he really was okay without her. She trusted Castle's words though, and after he told her everything was fine, she found it easier to concentrate on the murder board in front of her.

Castle opened the door and invited her in. He took her coat and she rid herself of her wet shoes.

Castle led her over to the couch where Louis was fast asleep, a thick blanket thrown over him. Kate smiled at the picture and bent to stroke his hair carefully.

"He and Alexis fell asleep while watching cartoons," Castle told her quietly.

"Everything went smooth then?"

Castle went into the kitchen and motioned for her to follow him, so they could talk without disturbing Louis. "Everything was fine, he was fine. Alexis did a good job of distracting him."

Relief washed over Kate's face. "I'm sorry I'm making such a big deal out of this. It's just ... he rarely stays with someone but me or his babysitter and I can't help it, I always worry about him."

"You don't have to apologize, I understand, I'm the same way." Castle gave her a sympathetic smile. "I was just about the reheat a slice of pizza, do you want one? I'd offer you one of the cookies we made earlier," he pointed at a large plate on the counter, "but I'm afraid the cookies the children made were not the worst ones to come out of the oven today. I think you went a little overboard with those gummy bears," he accused her jokingly.

Kate snorted. "So, it wasn't because of the obscene amount of sugar you added?"

"Do you want that slice of pizza or not?" Castle avoided her question, taking into account that the cookies were sickeningly sweet.

Kate nodded and they sat down at the counter and ate side by side.

"I've been meaning to ask you," Castle carefully broke the silence after a few minutes, "how do you manage?"

When Kate shot him a confused look, he elaborated further. "Raising a kid by yourself and working shifts. How do you do it?"

Kate put her slice of pizza on the plate and slightly pushed it away from her while thinking of a way to explain it to him.

He took her silence the wrong way and immediately apologized. "I'm sorry, that was too personal, I shouldn't have -"

Kate shook her head and gave him a small, reassuring smile. Castle seemed to be genuinely interested so she decided to tell him the truth. "It's hard and you miss a lot of bedtime stories," she started and tore off a piece of the pizza's crust to crumble it. "But I'm lucky to work at a very child-friendly Precinct. My Captain is very considerate and tries to always give me the weekends off and if a body drops at a hideous time of the day, he tries to send another team first. But much like today, that doesn't always work out. That's what Rosa is for. She's Louis' nanny, has been for 5 years actually. No matter what time I call her, she always comes right over. She's amazing."

"I'm glad you found someone trustworthy like her."

"Yeah, me too. She makes my life a lot easier," Kate smiled softly.

"In case, Rosa can't make it one time, you are always welcome to bring Louis over to the loft. We love having him here", Castle offered and gave her forearm a quick squeeze before picking up his pizza again.

"Thank you. And also thank you very much for today," she told him truthfully. "I sure hope he can spend a little more time with Alexis in the future. Her mirth is infectious, Louis is so happy and relaxed when he is around her."

Rick smiled softly at that. "Yeah, she is a little williwaw." He put their now empty plates in the sink and Kate went over to the couch where Louis was sleeping.

"Do you want me to call a cab?" Castle offered.

"Thanks but I parked my car outside."

"You actually found a spot?"

"It's a block away." Kate moved to wake her son softly, but Castle held her back.

"Don't wake him, he was really exhausted. Let me just grab a jacket and I'll help you."

He was back by her side within seconds and handed her her coat and covered Louis with his. While Kate put on her shoes, Castle carefully lifted the little boy and carried him over to the elevator.

"You don't have to do this, Castle, I know for a fact that he is quite heavy."

"It's nothing," Castle replied smoothly as the car rode down and Kate couldn't help but sneak a look at his arms and chest under his unbuttoned coat.

Together they made their way through the thin blanket of snow New York was covered with. When they spotted Kate's Crown Vic, she quickly opened the door and Castle carefully placed Louis in his seat and buckled him in.

"Thank you, Castle. For everything." Kate looked at him and gave him a small smile.

He squeezed her shoulder. "You're very welcome." She knew that he meant it. "Drive safe."

"Always do. Merry Christmas by the way."

"Merry Christmas!" and with that Castle turned around and jogged back to the loft where Alexis was still contently huddled under her thick blanket, sighing happily in her sleep.


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything.**

**Just a short filler chapter while I'm fighting a nasty cold. **

**Chapter 7**

Kate and Louis were cutting their way through the early evening crowd on the busy sidewalks of Manhattan. Checking her watch, Kate urged her son to walk a little faster. After all they were meeting Alexis and Castle and from her experience, these two were always on time, if not a little early. They rounded the last corner when she already spotted the fiery red hair of the little girl.

"Hey Alexis, hey Castle," she greeted them. "Thank you for coming."

"It's our pleasure," Castle replied. "We were the ones after all who couldn't make it on the original date. Speaking of, happy belated birthday Louis."

"Yes, happy belated birthday!" Alexis chimed in. "We got you something," she told him as she gave him a package she had been hiding behind her back.

The little boy had turned seven that previous weekend but unfortunately Castle had to go on a book tour and had no choice but to take Alexis with him due to his mother being out of town as well. They had missed his birthday party but decided to meet for a belated birthday dinner during the next week when Kate was not working.

"Thank you," Louis grinned happily and accepted the square package.

"Let's open it inside, huh?" Kate pointed towards the little restaurant they were standing in front of.

"Good idea." Castle held the door open for them and they were quickly seated at a table near the windows.

After they placed their orders, Louis' gaze fell on his gift again. "Can I open it now?"

"Go ahead, Tiger."

With his mother's approval the now seven-year-old ripped through the gift paper and revealed a square box.

"This is so cool! Thank you, thank you very much!" Louis grinned widely and hugged the box to his chest.

"What did you get?" Kate wanted to know.

"It's a harbor by _Lego._" He showed her the picture on the front of the box which not only showed a harbor but also fishermen and small fishing boats, but a crane and containers.

"It's because we already built a ship together and with that set," Alexis pointed at the box, "we can build a second ship and a real harbor and then we can really play with it."

"That's a great idea, Alexis, did you come up with that?"

"We were just walking through the store actually when I saw it," Alexis nodded.

"It just seemed to fit," Castle said with a smile, looking at Louis who was still staring at his gift.

Their conversation was interrupted when the waitress brought their plates and their apple juices. Before anyone could pick up a fork, Castle grabbed his glass and raised it. "Happy birthday, Louis," he toasted and clinked his glass with the others.

They sat in comfortable silence and ate their spaghetti with meatballs until Castle asked Louis about his actual birthday party.

"Did you have fun?"

"We went to the park and had a huge snowball fight and because my team was one person short, mommy played with us."

Kate felt her cheeks heat up when Louis mentioned that particular event. It was not often that she embraced her inner child like that and loosened up enough to be a little childish in public, but damn, if she hadn't had a lot of fun that day with Louis and a few of his friends.

"Did she now? Any chance we might get a repetition of that?" Castle grinned at her saucily and Alexis looked quite hopeful too.

"Nope, not gonna happen," Kate replied with a smirk, making Castle pout slightly.

They finished their noodles and for the first time since they met, Castle let Kate take care of the bill. But not without putting up a fight. She didn't care though, he had done so much for her and Louis already, not necessarily speaking of material things, but more of simply being a friend to them, now it was her turn to do a little something for him.

They left the restaurant and since it was still relatively early they decided to take an after-dinner walk through Central Park. A thin blanket of snow covered the ground and Kate was carful to avoid icy patches on the pavement. Maybe wearing heeled boots on a day like this wasn't the smartest idea. She and Castle fell into an easy conversation as they strolled through the park, their children walking a little ahead of them, pointing to interesting animal prints in the snow or forming the occasional snowball to see how far they could throw it. It was idyllic, really. It was dusky, but the white snow shone bright from the ground, making it easier to see. The last sunrays of the day shone through the thick treetops, creating bizarre patterns on the ground in front of them.

Kate watched Louis hauling a large snowball through the air with a smile when she stepped on a frozen puddle. Catching her off guard, her feet slipped from under her and she already came to terms with slipping and tumbling on her butt in the snow in front of Castle, Alexis and Louis when a strong arm wrapped around her lower back and a warm hand grabbed her elbow, preventing her from falling.

"Careful, those frozen puddles are everywhere, hidden under the snow," Castle told her once she stood upright again and she had a hard time reading his emotions. She had expected him to tease her for it, but he did no such thing. Instead, he seemed serious and regarded her with an expression she couldn't quite figure out.

"I should really watch where I'm going," Kate mumbled, only now realizing how close she was to him. She could feel the warm puffs of air that escaped his mouth in the cold winter night on her cheeks, leaving them tingling at the stark contrast of hot and cold air caressing them. "And you can let go of me now," she added somewhat breathlessly, feeling the heat of his arm on her back permeate through their thick layers of clothing.

"Sorry," Castle said, looking not the least bit like he meant it, but releasing his hold from her anyway, although never breaking eye contact.

"Look at this, mommy!" Louis interrupted their little moment and held up a large icicle, "Look how big it is!"

He didn't seem to expect a reply as he turned around again and caught up with Alexis to show it to her as well.

Next thing Kate knew, was Castle's hand on her arm again. She looked up at him and watched him tucking her arm through his. "Just in case you slip again," he told her and waggled his eyebrows.

Yeah right. She was sure that was the least significant reason of them all, but she left her arm where it was, reveling in the warmth his body gave off.


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything.**

**Chapter 8**

It was a Thursday morning in early March and Castle sat at his desk, proof-reading the last chapter he had written for _Derrick Storm_. There was no way he could postpone it any further and he really didn't have an excuse for doing so. He had walked Alexis to school, done the dishes, checked his e-mails and actually replied to all of them, even to the ones from Gina, and now there was nothing left that could distract him any further.

Until his phone rang, that is. He inwardly did a little victory dance as he picked up. "Castle."

"Rick."

She didn't even have to use his first name in order for him to know something was wrong, terribly wrong. Until now Castle had not thought Kate Beckett was scared of anything, but here she was, sounding completely frightened. Frightened, desperate, tiny. None of those words were ones he'd ever use to describe her. Something wasn't right.

"Kate? What's wrong?" He got out of his chair and started pacing in his office, trying to get some of the nervous energy out of his system.

"Rick, I'm in trouble." She sounded breathless and Castle immediately grabbed his keys and wallet and made his way to the front door to don a jacket and a pair of shoes. "Where are you, Kate?"

"My apartment. But I need to get out of here," she told him frantically. He heard rustling and swishing in the background, like someone was heedlessly tossing clothes around.

"I'll be there in ten." And with that he hung up, raced down the stairs and got behind the wheel of his silver Mercedes. He sped out of the garage and floored the accelerator while in his head he spun theory after theory about what could have scared Kate this much, disliking one more than the other.

After ten long minutes and hitting three red lights, he finally arrived at her building and got a parking spot right in front of it. Locking his car, he raced up the stairs and knocked on her door, utterly out of breath. On the other side of the door he heard shallow breathing and shoe-clad feet scurrying over parquet flooring but nobody opened up.

"Kate? It's me, Castle," he knocked again, worried.

At last, the door opened a crack and he found himself staring into the barrel of a gun. Unable to move, he froze on the spot, his heart racing, until the door opened further and he came face to face with a very pale Kate Beckett.

"Jeez, Kate!"

He saw how she looked around in the hallway before quickly pulling him inside, throwing the door closed and sliding the chain in place with shaking hands. Looking around her apartment he noticed two large suitcases standing in the living room.

"What's going on? Are you alright? Is Louis okay?" He only now thought of the little boy and couldn't see him anywhere.

"He's fine," Kate answered curtly, holstering her gun. "But we need to get out of here. Castle, you always know a guy or a place, do you know somewhere where we can go and stay for a few days? Outside the city?" The desperation in her voice made it clear that she was in urgent need of a solution.

He didn't ask her anything further but simply provided one. "Come with me," he told her as he grabbed one of the suitcases.

Kate mirrored him and grabbed the other one while calling for her son. Louis quickly appeared, carrying a small backpack, and clung to his mother's side, confusion and fear written across his features.

Together, the trio locked Kate's apartment up and went downstairs to Castle's car. While Caste put the suitcases in the trunk, Kate buckled Louis in, constantly checking her surroundings, before getting in the passenger side.

Castle slid behind the wheel and started driving.

"Where are we going?" Kate asked him after a few minutes of silently looking into the rearview mirror.

"The Hamptons. I have a house there," and looking at the confused little boy in the backseat, he tried to distract him, "Have you ever been to the Hamptons, Louis?"

The boy shook his head.

"It's great. We live right by the ocean. And in case the water is still a little too cold, we can always use the heated pool." When the boy didn't react, Castle shot Kate a helpless look.

"Do you want to go swimming, Tiger?" Kate too tried to get her son to think about something else.

"Maybe," came his mumbled response.

Kate sighed and ran a frustrated hand through her hair. In a feeble attempt to console her, Castle took her left hand in his right and gave it an encouraging squeeze, as the last buildings of New York flew past their window and they turned onto the freeway.

Two hours of silent driving later, they finally arrived at Castle's mansion-like vacation home. Kate only got a quick glimpse of the large two-story house with its brown clapboards and white window shutters before Castle pulled into the garage. As Kate helped Louis out of the car, Castle grabbed the two suitcases and carried them up the three stairs that led from the garage into the kitchen. When his gaze fell on the clock on the wall and he saw that it was already past noon, he quickly excused himself to make a call and left a flabbergasted Kate and a wide-eyed Louis behind to take in the house themselves.

Just like the loft it was very stylish and modern with large windows through which Kate could see a tiny strip of ocean on the opposite side of the house.

Castle came back into the kitchen and took a deep breath, willing for the anxiety to go away. He kept telling himself that they are safe, now that they have left the city.

"Let me show you around," he offered and led them from the kitchen into the living area. He showed them his own private little library, a room which Kate immediately fell in love with, and led them upstairs where the bedrooms were situated.

"The first room is the master bedroom. This room," he pointed to the room next to his, "is mother's room."

He opened the third door on the corridor and they found themselves in an ocean-themed child's room. "This is Alexis' room, but you are welcome to come in here and play whenever you want, Louis, I'm sure she won't mind."

Opening the door opposite to that room, he looked at Kate. "I'll give you the largest guestroom. It has a huge tub in the en-suite," he told her with a wink, trying for some normalcy.

Kate took in her surroundings. The room was large and so was the king-sized bed in the middle of it. It looked simply heavenly.

"I assume, you are going to sleep with mommy tonight?" Castle asked the boy who still clutched Kate's hand tightly and nodded.

"Alright then, I'll bring you your suitcases and give you a minute to get settled." With that, Castle left the room, carried the heavy suitcases up the stairs and disappeared into the kitchen where he took another couple of calming breaths. He didn't know what to think of the situation. Was she in immediate danger? How serious was it? He was desperate for answers but didn't want to confront her about it in front of the scared little boy, who too, obviously had no idea what was going on and it didn't look like he would let go of his mother's hand any time soon.

Sighing, he opened the fridge and made a mental note that he needed to do some serious grocery shopping. Looking for something edible, he found a can of ravioli in one of the cupboards and started heating its contents.

Just as he divided the food up into three portions, Kate and Louis descended the stairs.

"This smells wonderful Castle, but you shouldn't have."

"Well, we need to eat. However, if we are going to stay here for a couple of days, we should go grocery shopping, I only have canned food and not much else."

"Castle, what do you mean 'we'?"

"Well, I ... Did you really think I was going to let you stay here by yourself after _that _call?", he asked her, disbelief written across his features. She couldn't be serious!

"No! No, Castle, I didn't mean to disrupt your-"

"You didn't disrupt anything. I was bored anyway," he shrugged nonchalantly.

"Bored? You were bored?! Do you think this is a jo-," her blaze of anger was interrupted by the whimpering child to her left.

"I'm sorry, Tiger, I shouldn't have yelled," she quickly apologized and ran a hand soothingly through his hair. "That wasn't right of me. But Rick and I need to discuss some things. Are you going to be okay on your own for a couple of minutes?"

The boy nodded quietly and Castle went into the living room to turn on the TV. "Want to watch some cartoons? Alexis loves these," he pointed to the flat screen where _Donald Duck _was currently throwing a fit.

While the boy hopped off his stool and sat down on the large couch, Castle and Kate went into the library and shut the door behind them.

"What I said earlier was stupid, Kate," he began. "I don't think this is a joke, quite the contrary. And that's why I'm not going to leave you and Louis by yourselves. I can't, and please don't ask that of me. I'm worried."

She could tell. It was written in the tensity of his back and the way he spoke, his jaw tight, his chin angled more sharply and his lips a little paler.

"What about Alexis?"

"Alexis has a sleepover today and my mother will stay at the loft with her for the next couple of days. I called her earlier, it's all settled. They'll be running lines together, she won't even notice that I'm gone," he tried to lighten the mood.

Kate still had her doubts, so he added, "Alexis knows that sometimes I have to leave for a couple of days to work, she'll understand. Believe me, it's fine."

Finally, Kate caved. "If you're sure, then ... thank you. Thank you so much, Rick."

He squeezed her upper arms and led her over to a large couch in front of a huge fire place in the middle of the room. He sat down and motioned for her to do the same. "Now, tell me, what's going on?"

She sat down and began fiddling with one of her cuticles in her lap as she began to recount what happened. "We got a case yesterday. I can't go into detail what it is about and what happened, but sometime during the afternoon I started getting weird calls. When I picked up all I heard was heavy breathing before the line went dead. I thought it was just some joker, you know teenagers who thought it'd be funny to muck the police around. I thought nothing of it. But then this morning, when I arrived at the precinct there was a letter for me. A threatening letter. If I didn't stop investigating the case, me and the people I loved would regret it. Along with that was a picture of me as I left the Precinct the night before." She swallowed hard and bit down on her bottom lip to stop it from trembling.

"Oh, Kate."

"This is the first time anything like that has ever happened to me, I've only been a Detective for a little over a year. My Captain thought it was a serious threat and took me off the case and I just freaked. If he takes me off a case, it really is serious. Normally I'm not one to back down, but I always have to think about Louis and how he'd have no one, if something ever were to happen to me. I took a full week off and picked up Louis from school, all the while I had this feeling someone was following me." She wiped away a traitorous tear that slowly made its way down her cheek.

Castle scooted closer and pulled her against his chest. "Nobody followed us. We both checked the rearview mirror all the time, nobody followed us. The car is parked in the garage and I don't usually come out here this time of the year. As far as everyone else is concerned, this house is vacant. Nobody knows to look here for you."

Pressed into his warm and solid chest, Kate believed him.

"I know this is pathetic, I know I shouldn't have run, I- it's just ...," she lost the battle against her tears and held a little tighter onto his shirt.

"It's just a little too much," Castle offered and felt her nod into his shoulder.

"And that's okay, Kate." He started to stroke her back soothingly. "Look at you, you are a mom, you are a Detective and you are still so very _young_. You were forced to deal with so many things at such a young age, none of which anyone should _ever _have to deal with and yet you still stand tall and are an amazing mother to an amazing child and bring closure to the families of victims every day. Giving in to your fears and having a little break-down from time to time doesn't make you anything less amazing. Everyone breaks down once in a while, even the best of us. Even me," he stage-whispered, which made Kate snort through her tears.

"I know, right? Unbelievable!" he joked with exasperated arrogance.

For that, Kate whacked him lightly in the chest and pulled back. "It's funny how you always seem to know what to say to make me feel better," she told him with a weak smile.

"And I mean what I said," Castle told her truthfully.

"Really?" It was out of her mouth before she could swallow the words down. She inwardly cursed herself. Give the man more reason to find her pathetic.

He gaped at her. Did she really not know how remarkable she is? "Kate," he waited until she looked him in the eye, "I'm in awe of you." His words were laced with pure honesty. "You are so unbelievably strong and passionate. You are so brave and confident and you never give in. I have no idea how you do it but I admire you for your fortitude. And yes, you are amazing."

Listening to his words caused another onrush of tears.

"Hey now, I was actually kinda hoping for a smile here," he quipped as he wiped away her tears with his thumb.

That elicited a small laugh from her.

"That's better," he grinned at her. "How about I go check on Louis and you come join us whenever you're ready? Then we'll discuss what we're having for dinner?"

He waited for her to nod before he left the library and went into the living room, where Louis was still sitting on the couch, watching cartoons.

"Hey buddy, are you okay? Do you want some juice? I think I saw some in the kitchen."

While Castle went to retrieve the juice, Louis kneeled, and leaned over the back of the couch to watch him.

"What's going on? Is mommy alright?", the boy asked him after taking a sip of the lukewarm apple juice.

Castle sat down on the back of the couch and considered him for a minute. He always tried to be as truthful as possible with children, yet not truthful enough to scare them. "I think your mom should tell you herself what's going on, but you should know, that as long as we're here, everything is okay. And yes, your mom is alright. She just needed a friend to talk to. She'll be out in a minute."

The boy nodded, happy with that answer.

"Do you want to take a look around outside? Take a look at that pool?"

"Yes, please." Louis quickly got off the couch and went over to the large glass doors that led to the patio and to the strip of sand behind that. Castle opened the doors and guided the seven-year-old outside. They went to the ocean and tested the water - it was freezing - so Castle led him around the house where the large pool was. He also showed him the large backyard where a jungle gym and a double swing were.

* * *

**Thoughts?**


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

In the meanwhile, Kate was still in the library and tried to process everything that had just happened. She wasn't embarrassed about her outburst, Castle had looked like he was actually glad to be able to comfort her and hadn't looked bothered at all. It was the things he had said that needed to be processed. The 'you are amazing' still floated around in her head. No one had ever said anything like that to her before. Hearing those words had made her incredibly proud, it was the first time in a long time that she had been praised. Smiling at the memory of those words, she stood up and left the library in search for Castle and her son.

When she didn't find them inside, she went out on the patio, from where she could hear someone giggling. Following the cheerful sound, she turned to her left and walked around the house, where she found Castle pushing Louis on a swing in the backyard.

"There you are!" Castle greeted her. "Want me to push you as well or can you go as high as the clouds by yourself?", he pointed to the empty second swing with a cheeky grin.

"I think I can manage, Castle," Kate replied, rolling her eyes.

When she sat down on the unoccupied swing, Castle started pushing her nevertheless. "The one who can jump the farthest gets to choose what we are having for dinner tonight," he declared as he gave mother and son one final push.

Kate couldn't believe she was actually doing this, but she jumped. And landed a couple of inches behind Louis.

"I won mommy!"

"Yes you did, Tiger, you beat me!", Kate congratulated. "Now, what's for dinner?"

The boy looked from Kate to Castle and back to Kate. "Can we have fried calamari?"

Castle nodded in approval. "Sounds good to me. I'll make my way over to the small store down the street and get them. Is there anything else I could get while I'm at it?"

"Maybe some cookies, please? I really like cookies," Louis asked shyly and Kate was proud that he voiced his wish. He had always had trouble asking for things, especially from someone other than her.

"Cookies are mandatory! Are you two going to be okay by yourselves for the next half hour or so?"

Kate was glad he hadn't asked whether they would like to join him or not. Although she was pretty sure that nobody had followed them out to the Hamptons, she didn't feel comfortable to be out in public with her son after someone had threatened her. So she simply nodded and they made their way back into the house.

"Make yourselves at home, I'll be right back."

And with that Kate and Louis were left alone in the large house.

"Do you want to check out Alexis' toys while I read a little in the library?" Kate suggested.

She sauntered off to the library and took the room in fully for the first time. It was a very cozy room with long, dark bookshelves and a high ceiling. The dark couch in front of the large fireplace gave it a homey feeling.

She started walking around the room and let her gaze drift over the spines of the books. He had a lot of classics and also many plays. And she was sure she had spotted quite a few first editions along the way. A smile grazed her lips as she caught sight of a very old version of Leo Tolstoy's _Anna Karenina_. She had always loved that book, it always reminded her of the semester she'd spent in Kiev. Looking longingly at the comfortable couch in the middle of the room, she pulled the book out of the shelf and cozied up in front of the fireplace. A few minutes later, Louis joined her, one of Alexis' books in his hand. With her son by her side she let herself get lost in the world of Moscow in the 1870s.

That's how Rick found them when he returned with bags full of food.

"I knew you'd like this room," he smirked.

"You have great taste, Mr. Castle," Kate replied easily. "I've found about ten books I want to read."

"I'll leave you to it then and start dinner. Wanna help, Louis?"

"Yes!"

"I can help too," Kate protested and closed her book, already getting of the couch.

"Good choice," Castle told her as he saw the cover. "Just relax and continue reading, we boys got it." He winked at Louis and together they made their way into the kitchen to start with the calamari.

Smiling, she leant back and continued reading. She was glad Louis was bonding with Castle. The boy didn't have many men in his life he could look up to and be guided by, and Castle was a good role-model, she'd noticed as much.

The rest of the evening went by in a flash. Together, they enjoyed a meal of fried calamari and homemade fries. Days like those simply called for greasy food. Afterwards they played a game of _Monopoly_. Louis and Castle versus Kate. Of course she didn't stand a chance against the two of them. When Louis' eyes began drooping, she bid Castle goodnight and cuddled up with her son in the sensuously comfortable guest bed.

It was well past two in the morning when Castle too finally decided to go to bed. He had been up researching for his latest novel and had had lost track of time. Upon entering his bedroom, he decided to check up on his guests first. Maybe Kate was still up and needed something. He stood outside the closed door with his eyes shut and listened for a few seconds. He heard heavy breathing on the other side, accompanied with the occasional frightened moan and a shift on the mattress. After years of experience with Alexis, he knew the tell-tale signs of a nightmare. Just to be polite, he knocked silently on the door, but as a matter of course he didn't get an answer, so he cracked the door open and peered in. There he saw Kate Beckett on the bed, tensed up and writhing in her sleep, murmuring unintelligible syllables. He slowly made his way over to the bed and was glad to see Louis sleeping soundly. Castle softly shook Kate's shoulder and whispered her name in the dark. She snapped out of it immediately and jerked away from him, eyes wide, hands put up in defense.

"Kate, it's me."

"Castle?! What were you _thinking_?" she hissed, angry because he startled her.

"Shh," he pointed at the sleeping boy, "You were having a nightmare and judging from the sounds you made it was a pretty bad one," he told her softly.

She nodded as she vividly remembered her dream. Her sleep shirt was damp and her hands shook.

"Are you okay now? Or do you want to talk about it?"

"No, I'm fine," she told him as she softly ran a hand through Louis' hair, who still didn't stir.

Castle had a pretty good idea what her dream was about and gently squeezed her wrist, letting her know he'd be there if she needed someone to talk to.

"Goodnight then."

"Night, Castle."

The next morning, Castle awoke to the smell of scrambled eggs and sizzling bacon. Donning a robe, he followed the smell and found Kate in the kitchen, spatula in hand.

"Good morning. You're just on time, breakfast is almost ready," she told him with a smile.

"This smells amazing," Castle replied, inhaling the smell of freshly brewed coffee, "But you shouldn't have. You're my guest, you shouldn't have to work."

"No, please Castle, you have done so much for me, let me do something for you. This is nothing in comparison," she gestured at the eggs, the bacon and the waffles, "but it's-"

"It's great," Castle interrupted her. "Thank you."

"Listen, is there any news?" he asked her after checking that Louis wasn't in earshot.

"They are still running down leads. But my colleagues promised to call once they know more. I'll keep you in the loop," she promised him as she noticed Louis coming down the stairs, still wearing his pajama.

"Good morning, Tiger."

"Morning," the boy murmured while rubbing his eyes sleepily. When he saw the breakfast on the kitchen counter, his face split into a huge grin. "You made breakfast? Awesome!"

After they had appeased their hunger with Kate's delicious breakfast, Castle suggested they should enjoy the sunny weather and take a walk on the beach. The Becketts agreed and after everyone had dressed appropriately, Kate and Castle strolled along the edge of the water while Louis was running about picking up seashells and tossing them away again when they weren't big enough.

"He seems better," Castle nodded in the boy's direction.

"Yeah, he does. We had a little talk yesterday where I gave him the child-friendly version of what happened. He understands. And he also knows that we're safe here. Thanks to the large house and the beach he feels very at ease. I do too," she added with a small smile. "It's gorgeous here."

"I was very lucky to find this house with its private beach. Something that was very important to me."

"And why is that?" Kate asked him with a raised eyebrow, not sure she _really_ wanted to know. She could only think of one reason why someone would want a private beach, secluded from prying eyes.

Castle chuckled. He knew what she was thinking, but that was not the reason. "I wanted this property to be my ... sanctuary of sorts. I come here to escape the city, to escape my life as a novelist for a while. When I'm here I want to be myself, Alexis' slightly silly dad that builds sand castles and gets up to nonsense. If the press were to get wind of this ... well, there goes my image and the book sales."

Kate considered him for a moment. Only now she realized that she had no idea what it meant to be Richard Castle. "That must be difficult. Basically living two different lives?"

"It's not always easy, you're right. But it's so worth it. Thanks to my books I get to be a stay-at-home-dad. I'm very thankful for that."

To say Kate was surprised by his declaration was an understatement. Out of all things, he was thankful to get to stay at home with his little girl? She shook her head in disbelief. There really wasn't much of the playboy in him she'd read about in the papers so many times.

"What?" Castle wanted to know.

"Nothing," she smiled. "You're a great dad."

He beamed at her.

"Mommy! Look at this one," Louis ran over to her, holding a large conch shell in various brown and gold tones.

"You should hold it to your ear," Castle suggested. The boy looked at him questioningly but did it anyway.

"Do you hear that swooshing sound?"

The boy nodded.

"That's the ocean."

Fascinated, the boy held the shell away from his ear, looked at it, and pressed his ear into it again.

Castle stifled a smile. It has always taken him by surprise how children are mesmerized by the littlest things.

"I wish I could be _in_ the ocean," the little boy sighed, his shoulder slumped forwards.

"He loves the water," Kate explained. "Always has."

"We could go for a little swim in the ocean later on and when we're cold we can jump into the warm pool. Does that sound like fun?" Castle looked from Kate to Louis.

"I'm not sure I packed our swimsuits, Louis." Kate nibbled her lip. "I didn't think of it, I'm sorry."

"But I saw my swim trunks in my suitcase," Louis retorted.

"You did? I must have packed them without noticing. I know I didn't pack mine but you could always go swimming with Rick if he is willing to take you?", she looked at Castle, asking for confirmation.

"Oh, we are going to have so much fun, Louis," Castle grinned and rubbed his hands in anticipation and they began the long walk back to the house.

They walked in silence, each of them lost in thoughts. Castle thought of Alexis and how she would have loved to be here. She has always loved the Hamptons. It has barely been twenty-four hours but he already missed her terribly. He made a mental note to himself to call her after lunch. He knew she was in good hands with his mother but he needed to hear her voice.

When the house finally came into sight, he pointed at it and looked at both Becketts. "Race you!" And with that he was off. From the corner of his eye he saw Louis trying to catch up with him, but the wiry boy didn't stand a chance and just to impress Kate, who hadn't joined in in their foot race, a little, he ran as fast as he could.

The result of that was, that he was still trying to catch his breath when she finally arrived at the house, about three minutes later. She smirked at him and he tried to play it cool. "Even though we both know you're not faster than me, you could have at least made an effort," he said between two panting breaths, even managing a small, victorious smile.

"In your dreams, Castle," she told him whilst crossing her arms in front of her chest. "I can take you one-legged. And breathe normally afterwards," she added with a small laugh and Louis grinned too.

"What?" Castle let out a disbelieving laugh. Was she making fun of him? But before he could come up with something smart to say, Kate grabbed Louis' hand and walked him into the house to change him into his swim trunks.

When they returned, Castle was already ankle-deep into the water, gritting his teeth against the stinging coldness of the water. He heard Louis and Kate having a quick conversation but before he could turn around and chime in, the boy was already by his side, recoiling when a small wave hit his calves.

"Tell me when you're cold and we'll go into the pool, okay?"

Louis nodded and took a brave step forward, the water now hitting his knees.

"Think you can go all the way in?" Castle challenged and waded a little deeper into the water.

"Sure I can!" Louis exclaimed and followed him.

Soon the water reached just below his belly button and every time a little wave came, Louis jumped up, giggling.

"Are you ticklish?" Castle asked, already coming closer and wriggling his fingers in a tickling motion.

Louis took a step back, his arms protectively banded around his stomach. "No I'm not," he said with a grin and Castle lunged forward, attacking his sides with his fingers.

Louis shrieked and stumbled backwards, loosing his footing and going under. Not even a second later, he shot out of the water like a launching rocket, his brown hair plastered to his head.

"Oh, I think you are ticklish," Castle laughed and took the boys' hand to lead him out of the cold ocean and into the warm pool.

When he turned around, he saw Kate lounging in beach chair, a book leaning against her propped up knees. But she wasn't looking at the book, she was looking at him. When she noticed he caught her checking him out, she quickly dropped her head, her long hair like a curtain around her face.

Castle grinned to himself. Good to know that he wasn't the only one staring at someone else's butt in this house.

The distant ring of her cell phone brought his out of his reverie. He saw her picking it up and holding it to her ear, anxious at first but then the frown on her forehead smoothed and she started grinning. Walking a little quicker, he showed Louis to the pool and beckoned for Kate to join them, he wanted to know what got her all happy.

Kate jogged over to them and grinned. "That was Esposito, one of my partners from the 12th. They got the guy, he's currently sitting in lock up and signing his confession."

"Oh Kate, that's great, I'm so glad. That's a weight off my mind!" Without thinking, Castle pulled her into a bear hug.

"Castle!" she squeaked in return.

"What?" he asked confused and stepped back.

She pointed to her light blue sweater which was now wet in a few spots and stuck to her skin.

Castle's face split into a wide grin and he crushed her against his chest in another bear hug, trapping her slender arms with his bulky ones. "Well, since your clothes are already kind of wet, I'm sure you wouldn't mind them being dripping wet."

Kate knew what his intentions were. "Castle, don't you dare-," she threatened him, but her threat ended in a very girlish scream as Castle stepped over the edge of the pool with her pressed against his chest, and they fell in together.

She came up snorting and spluttering and shot him a glare. She'd pay him back for that, of that he was sure. But first she got back at her son who clung to the rim of the pool and laughed at the top of his voice.

"You think this is funny?" Kate slowly made her way over to him, glaring. She wasn't angry and Louis knew it, so he just kept shaking with laughter. She grabbed him around the waist and pulled him away from the rim into the middle of the pool. With all her force she heaved him into the air, and screaming with laughter, Louis fell backwards into the water.

Castle watched the whole interaction with fascination. It wasn't often that he got to see the playful side of Kate Beckett.

"You do realize you just ruined the only pair of sneakers I brought on this little ... trip?" she asked him and shook her head in disapproval. He knew she was trying to be angry with him, but the huge smile on her face let her feeble attempts fail miserably. "But you're right, the water has a pleasant temperature."

"I don't know, it kinda feels like someone peed in here," Louis crinkled his nose as he swam back to his mother.

Castle stared up at the sky and started to whistle innocently.

Kate had seen the mischievous sparkle in his eyes before he had averted his head and knew he was only kidding, but she was grossed-out anyway.

"Ugh, Castle, that's simply disgusting," she told him as she slapped his chest lightly and moved towards the ladder of the pool. All of a sudden swimming in the lukewarm water wasn't as appealing anymore.

"I was just kidding!" Castle tried to convince them to stay in the water but she ignored him. Louis followed her and she quickly began to towel him off. It was after all March, and even though the sun was shining, it was a little chilly, especially when you were wet. Castle followed suit and grabbed his own towel, only now realizing Kate didn't have one. He gave her his towel and asked Louis, the only one of them who was dry, to go into the house and get him another one.

"I think I'll need more than one towel, Castle," Kate pointed out. She had stepped out of her shoes and socks, but her pants were dripping. She'd need to wring them out if she didn't want to leave puddles everywhere she stepped.

"I have to admit I may not have completely thought this through as I shoved you in the pool," Castle told her with an apologetic grin.

"Really?" Kate deadpanned.

"Maybe you should just ... take them of?" Castle suggested, and pointed at the wet jeans as they clung tightly to her legs.

Kate snorted and shook her head incredulously. "And what do you dream about at night, Castle?"

He grinned at her with a mischievous glint in his eyes. "Well ..."

"Don't answer that, forget I even asked." Kate held up one hand to stop him from finishing his sentence.

Castle chuckled and kept his inappropriate thoughts to himself just as Louis rejoined them with another large towel in his hands.

"No really, take off those clothes and put them in the laundry room, I'll put them in the dryer later. In the meantime, I'll just be upstairs." Castle slung his towel around his hips and made his way into the house, leaving Kate and Louis outside.

He took a quick shower to rid himself of the nasty pool water and quickly ran a towel through his hair before going downstairs and preparing a few sandwiches. Swimming was always tiring and even though they had had a hearty breakfast that morning, his stomach was grumbling.

Kate soon joined him behind the counter, her hair still a little damp, and started slicing the tomatoes Castle had gotten out of the fridge.

"Mommy?" Louis said slowly. "Everything is okay again, right?"

Kate momentarily paused. "Yes baby, everything is fine." She gave him a reassuring smile and Louis smiled back at her for a second before his face fell again.

"That means we are going back home," he stated flatly.

Kate reached over to lovingly run her hand through his hair. "We are."

"When?"

"I .. uhh," Kate looked at Castle for help. She hadn't really given it much thought. She didn't know if they were going back together or if Castle wanted to stay a couple more days by himself.

Castle caught her gaze and replied in place of her. "We could leave after lunch, if you have to be back in the city for some reason. But we could just as well stay the weekend. Unless you're on call? I could give mother and Alexis a call, send them a car and they could be here this afternoon."

At the mention of Alexis' name, Louis' eyes lit up.

"Actually my Captain forced me to take off the full week I had requested yesterday. But, uh, Castle, you don't have to do all of this." Kate nibbled her lip and bent her head for a quick second before catching his gaze again. "You already went through so much trouble because of us."

Castle shook his head. "It's no trouble, Kate. I haven't been out here in quite a while anyway and I am really enjoying myself. Alexis loves coming here as well. She would be thrilled." He gave her a quick smile while grabbing three plates from a shelf.

"If you're sure?"

"Absolutely."

"What do you think, Louis?" The question was unnecessary, Louis' grin said it all.

"I want Alexis to join us!"

Castle held his hand up in a high-five-gesture and Louis hand met his with a loud smack.

He grabbed his phone off the counter and excused himself. "I'll just call my mother and my car service."


	10. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything.**

**I woke up to the sweetest reviews/PMs the other day, thank you very much!**

**Chapter 10**

While Castle was gone, Kate put the leftover ingredients back into the fridge and poured three large glasses of juice.

"They'll be here shortly before dinner," Castle announced as he strode back into the kitchen, grabbing one of the finished sandwiches. "And Alexis asked if you wanted to sleep in her room", he informed Louis.

The boy looked at his mother for permission; Kate only smiled and nodded.

"I'd love to," the boy exclaimed happily and took a sip of his juice.

"Alright then. We only have to set up the second bed."

And that's what they did after lunch. Kate took care of the dishes while Castle and Louis prepared the guest bed in Alexis' room.

Before they knew it, they heard the slam of two car doors and the ring of the doorbell. Together, they opened the door to reveal a grinning Alexis and a slightly exhausting looking Martha.

"Daddy!" The excited redhead leaped into his arms and Castle caught her just in time.

"Hey Pumpkin, I missed you," he murmured into her hair as he held her close.

With Alexis still holding onto his shoulders, he leaned down to give his mother an awkward kiss on the cheek. "Hi mother, thank you for joining us."

"Nonsense kiddo," the older redhead waved her hand in dismissal. "I'd never let the opportunity to come out here slip." Only now did she seem to notice Kate, and Louis, who held on tightly to his mother's hand and stood slightly behind her.

"And who do we have here?" Martha directed her question at Castle and gave him a chiding look for forgetting his manners.

"Ah, mother, this is Kate and her son Louis. Kate, Louis, this is my mother, Martha," Castle quickly introduced them.

Kate immediately liked the older woman as they shook hands. She had something warm and maternal about her that Kate felt drawn to.

"You are even more stunning than Richard told me," the older woman said warmly and and a blush crept into Kate's cheeks. Kate needed a minute to assimilate that information and didn't respond immediately but only turned her surprised eyes to Castle.

Sensing the slight awkwardness of the situation, he finally put Alexis down and grabbed the handles of the two suitcases Martha had brought along. "I'll just bring these upstairs," he told them and fled the scene.

"Alexis, why don't you tell Kate and Louis about what happened during recess today?", Martha suggested, as she too, went into the direction of the stairs. "I'll be right back." And with that, she quickly followed her son upstairs, while Alexis happily recited how they had found a tiny bunny in the school yard.

When Martha finally caught up to her son, she demanded for answers. "Richard, what is going on? Why are you here with Katherine and Louis?" And after a pause she added, "Are you two ...?" She didn't finish the sentence, but she didn't have to. Castle knew exactly what she was thinking when he saw the hopeful glint in his mother's eyes.

"No, mother!" he said emphatically, making it clear that nothing was going on between them. "Something happened at work and she got frightened, so she called me. I brought her and Louis here because it was safe."

Upon seeing the worried look his mother gave him, he reassured her quickly. "The threat was eliminated, there's nothing to worry about anymore. Otherwise I would not have asked you and Alexis to join us."

"Why exactly did you ask us to join you?" Martha asked him, slightly teasing. She knew there was something her son hadn't told her yet.

"We figured since we are already out here, we could as well make a mini-vacation out of it," Castle told her with a shrug of his shoulders, trying not to raise any suspicion.

"And?" Martha knew there was more to it.

"Fine," Castle sighed and gave in, he could never hide anything for long from his mother. "Over the last few days Kate and I talked a lot. She opened up to me and I finally got a glimpse of who she really is under that mask of hers she has put on. But I sense that there is still more to her. To her story. Unfortunately, with Louis around, interrupting our little talks or always being in earshot, she won't open up any further. I have the feeling that she doesn't really have anyone to talk to and she _wants_ to open up and let someone in but ..."

He stopped talking when he saw the flashbulb light up in Martha. "Ah," she said with a knowing smile. "You want me and Alexis to distract Louis, so you two can have some privacy."

"Would you, mother? This is really important to me. Kate is important to me."

"Of course, kiddo," Martha patted his cheek lovingly.

"Just to clarify, I do want to spend time with Alexis, and you of course," he added hastily, "but having half an hour to ourselves would be really nice."

"Don't worry, I'll make sure you have more than enough time," and with that, Martha turned around. "Come on, they're probably wondering where we are."

Together they descended the stairs and went into the kitchen where they found Alexis entertaining Kate and Louis. When Kate noticed them, she sent Castle a slightly worried look. They must have been upstairs for quite some time.

"What's for dinner, daddy?" Alexis asked.

"I thought I could go get some pizza. Everyone fine with that?" He was met with four enthusiastic faces. "There's this place nearby that makes the best pizzas in a ten mile radius," Castle explained as he grabbed his car keys, "But unfortunately they don't deliver. You have to pick up the food yourself. Do you want to join me, Kate, and pick out something for you and Louis?"

Kate hastily got off the barstool she had been occupying. "Eh, sure."

"My mother will watch Louis and Alexis, don't worry." Castle winked at his mother and Martha smiled back at him, already smitten with seven-year-old Louis.

Half a minute later, they were already out of the house and in the garage, but Castle was hesitating to open the door.

"Would you maybe want to walk to the restaurant? It's not even two miles and we've been stuck inside the house for days now."

"Taking a walk sounds like a good idea," Kate replied with a smile.

XXX

They were walking next to each other on the sidewalk, enjoying the last rays of sun on their faces, when Kate began to let her mind wander. She thought back to how Castle had just taken her and Louis in, without even knowing what exactly was going on, and how he hadn't asked for anything in return. Quite opposite, how he was even reluctant to let her make a big deal out of this.

Castle must have noticed her frowning because he nudged her with his elbow. "What's up?"

Kate took a deep breath. "I was just thinking," she side-stepped, not offering him any more.

"About?"

"About how I can repay you for everything you have done for me."

"But Kate, I told you, I don't want-"

She cut him off quickly. "I know you don't want anything in return. But I ...- How can I not give you anything back?" She was beginning to be frustrated with herself. Why couldn't she simply accept what he had done for them? Why did she feel like she had to make it up to him?

"Do you really want to do something for me?"

"Yes! Please!"

"Alright," Castle sighed. "There is something you could do for me. I know it's a lot to ask for, and you don't have to ..."

"Castle, what is it?"

"Have you been reading the papers for the last couple of months? Specifically Page Six?"

Kate shot him a confused look and shook her head.

"If you had, you would have known that last spring, after six months of being engaged, Gina broke up with me."

"Gina? Your-"

"My publisher, yes."

Kate was stunned. She was a fan of Castle's book but she had never had the time to keep track of his personal life. She couldn't believe she had missed the announcement of their engagement and their break-up! It must have been plastered all over the tabloids.

She shot Castle an apologetic look but didn't really know where he was going with this. What did his ex-fiancée have to do with anything?

"After the break-up, I didn't really feel like going out," Castle went on. "Paula, my agent, has been fine with that for a while. But the past couple of months she has been pressuring me to go out again. I went to public events twice this year and both times were a disaster. You see, I have two choices," he explained to her. "I can either go alone, only to have women throwing themselves at me, making a show of being seen with me. Which is so obnoxious by the way," he shook his head in disbelief, "Or I can go with someone. But do you know how hard it is to find a date, that wants to go out with you because of who you are, not because of who the papers state you are?"

Now Kate got a faint idea of what he was going to ask her, and all of a sudden she wasn't so eager to repay him anymore.

"What I'm saying is, next weekend I got invited to attend a gala opening and I have already confirmed that I'm going. I really don't want to go alone, but I also don't want to go with someone who doesn't really care about me." He took a deep breath before turning his head and looking at her. "Kate, I would love for you to go with me."

She had expected him to say that, yet, when he finally did, she sucked in a startled breath. She looked at him hesitantly. She didn't fit into his world at all, she had never been to a gala opening and didn't know what to expect of one.

Noticing her gaze, Castle smiled at her. "As I said, you don't have to, it was just a thought. I'm sure I'll think of something else, if you still really want to pay me back."

"As whom would you introduce me?" she asked after her heart had finally stopped fluttering wildly in her chest.

Castle thought about that for a second. He would love to introduce her as his date, but he didn't think she was ready for that yet. "As a friend who is interested in art," he told her instead.

Kate knew she wasn't completely able to mask her disappointment. A little insecure, she told him she would think about it.

They had finally arrived at the restaurant and while they ordered their pizzas and waited for them to finish, Kate went back to feeling disappointed. _'_A friend who is interested in art', really? He was _the_ Richard Castle, and she was just Kate Beckett, homicide Detective, but some small part of her had really hoped ... What had she hoped? That Richard Castle would be interested in being more than just friends? That Richard Castle saw more in her than a cop and a single mother? She snorted at her own ridiculousness.

The pizzas arrived and Castle paid for them, while she gathered the boxes in her arms. With the smell of freshly baked pizza in their noses, they quickly made their way back home, where they were greeted by an overly excited Alexis.

"Pizza is here! Grams, Louis, the pizza is here!"

They settled down at the dining table which had already been set by Louis and Alexis. They dug in and had light conversation. Alexis told them again about the bunny in the school yard and how she and her grandmother had run lines all day long, and Martha was still convinced Alexis would be great on Broadway.

After dinner, Martha excused herself. Friends of hers lived in the Hamptons and since she hadn't seen them in a while, she decided to drop by. That left Castle and Kate with the two children. They decided to play _Chutes And Ladders_, Alexis' favorite board game. After the exhausting day the girl had had, her eyes began drooping quite soon, though, and they decided to put the kids to bed.

Alexis was sitting on her bed, dressed in a frilly purple nightgown, with Castle sitting behind her, struggling with her red hair as he tried to put it into two side braids, when Kate and a pajama-clad Louis entered the room.

Louis crawled under the covers of the guest bed while Kate watched Castle with amusement. "What are you doing?"

"Alexis wants to have wavy hair in the morning, so I'm putting her hair into two side brides," he explained to her, while Alexis nodded her head and Castle lost hold of one of the strands.

He groaned and tried to pick up the strand without having to let go of the other two.

"Wouldn't it make more sense to put the hair into two French braids if you want to have wavy hair?" Kate asked and Castle shot her a frustrated look.

"Daddy can't do French braids, he's barely mastered a normal one," Alexis explained.

"Give me some credit," Castle grumbled behind her, "I never had to deal with hair before. And do you know how fine your hair is? And how large my hands are?" Castle wiggled his fingers in front of Alexis' face, making her giggle.

"Move over," Kate told him, as she too sat down on the bed. Castle let go of the fiery red hair and made space for her. Expertly, Kate parted Alexis' hair down the middle and with nimble fingers began the first French braid.

In the mean time, Castle went over to one of Alexis' bookshelves and grabbed a book.

"A bedtime story, yes!" Alexis cheered. Castle watched in fascination how Kate didn't even seem to notice that the girl had moved her head, and continued to braid untroubledly.

He sat down on Louis' bed and began to read in his rich voice. He was halfway through the story, when Kate finished with the second braid. Alexis leaned back into her chest and looked up at her with a grateful smile. Kate smiled back at her and made herself comfortable against the headboard. Slightly hesitant, the little girl leaned back against her, not knowing if she was allowed to do that. Reassuring her, Kate pulled her more firmly into the vee of her legs and started to stroke her shoulder and upper arm. Gratefully, the little girl rested her head high on Kate's stomach, and continued to listen to her father's calming voice.

Closing the book with a soft thud, Castle looked up to see his daughter falling asleep against Kate and smiled at the lovely picture they made. He rubbed Louis' back once more before getting up and helping Kate extricate from behind Alexis without disturbing the sleepy girl too much. While he dropped a kiss against Alexis' forehead, Kate sat down on Louis' bed and wished him sweet dreams.

They whispered their final goodnights into the darkness of the room, before closing the door and Kate had to smile at the domesticity of it all.

In the hallway she bid Castle goodnight and turned to leave.

"What? No goodnight kiss for me?" Castle joked and dramatically placed a hand over his heart, feigning to be hurt by her actions, or rather, inactions.

She turned back to him with a saucy grin. "In your dreams."

"In my dreams," Castle retorted, recovering fairly quickly from his dramatic climax, "you-"

Kate hastily covered his mouth with her palm, effecitvely shutting him up before slipping away into her room.

A little confused she went to brush her teeth. What was it with all the innuendo but only wanting to introduce her as a friend, if she were to accompany him to the gala opening? Shaking her head, she tried to rid her mind of his mixed messages and curled up in her bed with Castle's copy of _Anna Karenina_.


	11. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything.**

**Just didn't have the heart to split this into two chapters, sorry for the ridiculous length of it ;) Let me know what you think?**

**Chapter 11**

The next morning Kate awoke fairly early to the giggling of two little children. Groaning, she rolled over and tried to go back to sleep, but failed miserably when the giggling didn't stop. Finally, she decided to probe the causes of those joyful sounds and got out of bed. She cracked the door to Alexis' room open and smiled at what she saw. Alexis and Louis were lying on Alexis' bed, belly down, thumbing through a book.

"Good morning you two," she said with a smile. Both kids whipped their heads around, and Louis immediately got off the bed when he saw his mother standing in the doorway.

"Morning, mommy," he said with a large grin as he wrapped his arms around her middle.

"Morning Tiger. Did you sleep well?" she asked him, pressing a kiss into his hair.

The boy nodded and dragged her over to the bed, where he flopped down next to Alexis again.

"What are you two doing?"

The redhead held up the book they had been looking at. "We're too tired to read so we've been making up stories to the pictures."

"Do you want me to read it to you?" Kate offered.

Louis immediately scooted to one side of the bed and patted the space between him and Alexis.

Kate gracefully wriggled herself in-between the children and started reading.

That's how Castle found them twenty minutes later. Lucky for him, their backs faced him, so they didn't notice him sneaking up behind them. He grabbed Alexis' ankles and gave them a sharp tug, pulling the girl down the bed a few inches. She shrieked in surprise and delight and grabbed onto Kate's forearm for help.

"Daddy!" Alexis scolded him, laughing all the while.

Castle too squeezed himself onto the bed, almost pushing Louis off and squishing Alexis in the process.

"You're too big, daddy," Alexis giggled. Castle grabbed her ankle once more and pulled it over his back. Alexis got the message and rolled onto his back, leaning her head on his shoulder, while he scooted closer to one side of the bed, so Kate and Louis had a little more space. He closed his eyes and listened to Kate's melodic voice as she finished the story without any further interruptions.

"Thank you, Kate," Alexis told her, after Kate closed the book.

"You're welcome," she smiled at the girl who was still lying on her dad's back. "Do you want to see how that waves turned out?" Kate motioned to the two braids adorning the girl's hair.

Alexis sat up and crawled towards the end of the bed, so they could have a little more space. Kate scooted up behind her and started to loosen the braids, fluffing the hair slightly. When she was finished, Alexis had closed her eyes in pleasure and sighed deeply.

"You like that, don't you?"

The girl nodded. "It's nice. And you don't tweak my hair."

"Yeah well, I try," Kate laughed.

"I do too!" Castle pouted, knowing the comment about tweaking her hair was meant for him.

"I know, daddy." Alexis smiled at him, still enjoying the feeling of Kate's slender fingers in her hair.

Castle smiled back at her before getting off the bed. "Wanna help me make breakfast, Louis?" The boy seemed glad to be able to escape the hair-talk and followed Castle out of the room.

"How do the waves look?" Alexis asked Kate after the boys left.

"I think they're beautiful," Kate told her while twirling a strand of red hair.

"Do they look like yours?"

Kate touched her own hair that curled just above her shoulders. "Not really, no. Were you hoping they looked like my curls?"

Suddenly shy, the redhead nodded her head and started to play with the frilly hem of her nightgown, not meeting Kate's gaze.

"I know just the thing," Kate told her, not giving her the chance to be insecure any longer. "We can try a different hairstyle tonight and hopefully tomorrow you'll wake up with curls like mine."

"Really?", Alexis looked at her hopefully.

"Really," Kate stated. She got off the bed and held her hand out to Alexis. "Come on, let's check on the boys before they burn down the house."

Giggling, Alexis accepted her hand.

Hand in hand, they walked down the stairs and into the kitchen. When they entered, Castle looked up and froze. He eyed Kate up and down before his eyes widened comically.

"That is so hot," he exclaimed, the filter between his brain and mouth clearly non-existent.

A little confused, Kate looked down at herself. She was wearing an oversized t-shirt and yoga shorts. There was nothing special about it, except ...

"You a fan?" she asked him, motioning to the _Green Lantern _logo printed on her shirt.

"He's a mega-fan," Alexis stage-whispered and Kate had to bite back a grin.

"Totally true," Castle agreed with his daughter while nodding earnestly. "Please tell me you are a fan too?"

"I am a fan," Kate admitted, adhering to her love of comic books.

At that point, Castle turned away from her and bit his fist to prevent him from saying something totally inappropriate.

Kate shook her head but smiled nevertheless, and took the spatula Castle had dropped on the counter, turning to the beacon right on time before it crumbled to ashes.

Without having to ask for it, Alexis and Louis got out plates and silverware and Castle put some toast in the toaster. They had just taken a seat at the table when Martha descended the stairs.

"Just on time, mother," Castle greeted her and got another plate from the shelf.

"Good morning, kiddos," Martha greeted them as she helped herself to a slice of toast. "What's your plan for today?"

"Can we go swimming?" Alexis immediately asked. It had been a while since she had been to the Hamptons and she was a water lover.

"Of course we can," Castle told her. "Even though I really want to go to the farmer's market today. I figured I could make ratatouille for dinner but I need some fresh vegetables for that."

"That's a brilliant idea, Richard!" And turning to Kate, Martha gave her a conspirational wink, "The farmer's market is beautiful. The only place where I go grocery shopping voluntarily."

"Can I go with you daddy? I like the farmer's market, too," Alexis asked after swallowing a bite of bacon.

"Sure thing, Pumpkin. Kate, Louis, do you too want to join us?"

"We would love to," Kate nodded, not even asking her son. Louis didn't like grocery shopping but they all needed to get out of the house they've been stuck in for the past two days.

After breakfast, they did the dishes together and got into Castle's Mercedes. The drive to the farmer's market was short, and when Kate got out of the car, she had to agree with Martha. The market was beautiful. There were over two dozen different stands with the brightest colored fruits and vegetables Kate had ever seen. Bright red tomatoes, dark green cucumbers and deep purple eggplants everywhere. A bunch of people were already digging their way between the stands, but it wasn't too crowded.

Castle put on a pair of sunglasses to protect his eyes from the harsh rays of the morning sun and placed a hand on the small of Kate's back to lead her into the center of the market area.

Due to the bright sun it was relatively warm and that morning Kate had decided to only wear a thin, white tunic. Yet, when Castle placed his hand on her back, she cursed herself for wearing something this thin. The warmth of his palm easily seeped through the fabric and left her lower back scorching. She took a deep, calming breath and forced herself to relax.

Luckily, Castle soon found a stand that sold beautiful peppers and tomatoes and needed both hands to pay for the food and to carry the bags. While he was occupied, Kate spotted another stand nearby that sold a variety of berries.

"Hey Alexis, what is your favorite berry?"

"I like raspberries and strawberries," the redhead replied, playing with a strand of her now curly hair.

Kate suddenly had an idea. "Do you like raspberry tarts?"

"Are you going to bake one mommy?" Louis asked, excitedly rolling on the balls of his feet.

Kate only nodded and smiled. "Come on." She reached for both of their hands and went over to the stand where she bought a pound of fresh raspberries.

She had just tucked her wallet back into her purse when a flustered Castle ran up to them.

"Jeez! Lucky for me my daughter is easy to spot in a crowd. Or else I might have thought I lost you!" Kate could tell he wasn't really mad, he just had a slight scare, but she felt guilty anyway. She hadn't thought of Castle at all when she took the children to the raspberry stand.

"Oh no, Castle, I'm so sorry," she gasped. She really was but Castle waved her off. He took her left arm and linked it with his right. With his own left, he grabbed Louis' hand. "You two are hard to spot in a crowd, I'm not letting go of either of you," he told the two Becketts and steered them towards the next stand.

Kate smiled at his silly antics and held her own hand out for Alexis to take. The little girl gladly accepted and together, they made their way across the market.

They stopped at one more stand to buy eggplants and fresh herbs and Castle proudly managed to pay for the food without having to let go of either Louis or Kate. He got a funny look from the chubby woman behind the stand but he simply smiled at her and held onto Louis' hand a little tighter.

They slowly made their way back to the car and received a lot of appreciative nods and smiles from strangers along the way. To an onlooker they must look like an intact, happy family. A thought that left Kate slightly wistful. She wanted nothing more than to give Louis a family. A real family. With two adults that loved him.

As soon as Castle parked the car in the garage, Alexis sprinted through the kitchen and up the stairs to change into her bathing suit.

"Is it okay with you if I take the kids swimming?" Castle asked Kate as they too got into the kitchen to store away the groceries. "I wish I knew where my mother was so she could keep you company."

"Castle, please, I'm sure Martha has better things to do. And I don't need someone to keep me company, I will just get started on my tart." The last thing she wanted was for Martha to be forced to deal with her. She was a big girl, she didn't constantly need someone around to keep her occupied.

"Alright, just yell if you can't find something. Butter and eggs should be in the refrigerator and sugar is in that cabinet over there," Castle pointed to one.

"Thank you. Now, go have fun," Kate shooed him out of the kitchen and started to gather the ingredients for the batter.

Twenty minutes later, Kate put the cake base into the fridge to let it chill. Taking off her socks, she rolled up the legs of her jeans and went out of the house and started walking down the strip of beach, into the water. It was still freezing but she didn't mind too much. She walked calf-deep into the water and was quickly joined by Alexis who fearlessly ran into the water until it reached her waist.

"I like the beach better than the pool, but daddy is so squeamish when it comes to cold water," the girl explained to her, obviously happy that now Kate was here to supervise her in the ocean.

Kate laughed softly. "I guess that once more proves that women are tougher than men, huh?"

"Definitely," Alexis nodded and took another step, the water now reaching her belly button. "Is the tart finished already?"

"No, not yet. The cake base needs to chill for another half hour or so. Afterwards I'll put the raspberries on top and then it'll go into the oven. It'll be ready in an hour or so."

"Can I help you?" Alexis asked, somewhat shy all of a sudden.

"Of course, I'd love some help. In fact, we could probably start washing the raspberries already." Kate was glad the girl had offered her help, she was getting a little bored in the kitchen all by herself.

Alexis sprinted out of the water, splashing the ice cold water around in the process. Kate loved the enthusiasm of the little girl, even when it meant that she got a little wet because of it. She checked in with Castle and Louis, while Alexis dried herself with a towel.

Kate stood at the brim of the pool and watched proudly as Louis took a deep breath and dove into the water to gather up a diving ring. When he appeared again, he triumphantly held the red ring up.

"Mommy, Rick is teaching me how to dive!" He swam over to her, grinning widely and obviously very pleased with himself.

"That sounds like a lot of fun, Rick surely is a good teacher."

"He is. He can hold his breath really long." Louis expression was one of awe and Kate had to smile at the fact that her son had a little boy crush on Castle.

Kate mouthed a 'thank you' to Castle and went to find Alexis. She found her in the kitchen, wrapped in a fluffy pink bathrobe. "You ready?"

"Yes! And I have already washed my hands!" the girl wriggled her fingers in front of her and Kate gave one of her, now straight again, strands of red hair a soft tug.

Together they put the raspberries into a sieve and Kate showed Alexis how to wash them. Alexis was willing to learn and did everything Kate told her to the best of her ability. Soon, the cake base was chilled enough and they pressed it into a cake dish. They put the raspberries on top and sprinkled it with sugar before putting it into the oven.

"This is going to be one amazing cake," Kate announced. "And all because you helped." She lovingly tweaked the girl's nose, making her giggle.

Kate had just finished cleaning the kitchen when Martha walked in.

"Katherine, Dear, I'm so glad I found you. I was just looking for."

"Oh?"

"I got something for you," the older redhead motioned for her to follow her up the stairs. A little confused, Kate and Alexis did as asked.

"I was just cleaning out my closet, when I found this," Martha held up a black swimsuit when Kate entered her room. "Richard told me you didn't pack one and I just found this by accident. I've never worn it because it's clearly not my size, but it looks like it might fit you."

Martha didn't tell her that instead of cleaning out her closet, she had been specifically looking for that piece of clothing all morning.

Before Kate could respond, Alexis started to squeal and basically tackled her grandmother. "Thank you grams, now Kate can go swimming with us!" The girl grabbed the black swimsuit and chucked it to Kate who caught it skillfully.

It was apparent that she didn't have much of a choice, so she grabbed the piece of clothing, thanked Martha and went into her own bedroom to change. Martha had been right, the suit fit her like a glove. It was a simple, black suit, not overly sexy, but Kate was glad about that. She quickly grabbed a towel off the rack in her bathroom, wrapped it around her waist and found Alexis waiting for her in the hallway. Together they went to the pool, where Alexis immediately dropped her robe and jumped in. While Castle and Louis welcomed the eight-year-old back, Kate dropped the towel onto a beach chair and went to the stairs of the pool. As she took her first step into the water, Castle finally noticed her and his response to seeing her in a swimsuit was quite comical. His jaw actually dropped a few inches as he let his gaze travel up and down her body unashamedly, and Kate sucked in her stomach a little, just for good measure.

When she was waist-deep into the water, he was still staring at what was visible of her above the waterline, and she finally faltered a little under his obtrusive gaze. A soft blush crept into her cheeks and she raised one eyebrow at him. "Castle?"

That seemed to snap him out of his reverie. "Uhh ... eh, sorry. I'm glad you could join us," he stammered, quickly averting his gaze.

"Grams found her the swimsuit," Alexis told him, as she clung to him.

"I'm glad," he said with a strain to his voice, not sounding fully convinced to Kate's ears.

They spent the rest of the day swimming, eating the raspberry tart, for which Kate and Alexis got many compliments, and preparing the ratatouille with Castle without any further ... incidents similar to the one in the pool. It had taken both adults a couple of minutes to be fully comfortable around each other again, but when they finally were again, they had taken turns diving for the diving ring, and playing games with the children.

When it was bedtime, Kate remembered the promise she had made Alexis in the morning. She sat down on the girl's bed and patted the space in the vee of her legs, motioning for the girl to sit down. Alexis complied and Kate once again parted her hair. But his time she twisted it into two buns, one on each side of her head. When she secured each of them with an elastic, she asked the girl to turn around. Kate grinned at the sight of Alexis.

"You kind of look like Princess Leia from _Star Wars_, only with red hair."

Upon hearing that, Castle sucked in a breath, and clamped a hand in front of his mouth in a very girly manner. "You know _Star Wars_?"

"Who doesn't?" Kate retorted.

"That is so ...," he seemed to be at a loss for words, so Kate helped him out, remembering their similar conversation earlier that morning. "Hot?", she offered with an eyebrow raised in amusement.

"Yes, _so _hot," Castle agreed.

Kate shook her head and got off the bed to tuck her son in. "Sleep tight, Tiger," she told him and pressed a kiss to his forehead. Castle too wished his daughter a good night and squeezed Louis' foot upon leaving the room.

Castle pulled the door closed and turned to Kate in the hallway. "Would you like a glass of wine? Since my mother is out again, we both can actually have more than just a sip."

"I'm sure your mother isn't that bad," Kate laughed. "And yes, please."

Castle poured them both a glass, but before they could make themselves comfortable on the couch, his phone rang. Checking the display, he groaned. "Gina," he explained. "She's been bugging me all week. I should really take this, I'm sorry."

To give him some privacy, Kate went into the library, pulled a book out of a shelf and sat down along the length of the couch, crossing her ankles.

Only a few minutes later, Castle entered. "Mind if I join you?"

"Castle, this is your house, you don't have to ask for permission," Kate reminded him and shifted to place her feet on the ground and make some space for Castle. But he was faster and grabbed her feet, only to place them in his lap after sitting down.

"Everything alright with Gina?" she dared to ask, trying not to interpret too much into the position they were currently sitting in.

He nodded. "She just called to remind me I have a deadline." After a pause, he added, "Listen, I just wanted to properly thank you for doing Alexis' hair, she really looks up to you."

"No problem, I enjoy doing her hair, she seems to, too."

Castle nodded again. "It means a lot to her."

Kate sensed the opportunity to finally find out more about the girl's mother. "Castle," she began hesitantly, "I hope you don't mind my asking, but why does it mean so much to Alexis if someone braids her hair?"

Sighing, Castle began playing with the hem of her sock, something Kate chose to ignore as well. "Her mother, Meredith, lives in L.A., has been since Alexis was two years old. She has never been around very much, so Alexis was always jealous of other girls her age that wore a different hairstyle to kindergarten or school every day. I really tried," he smiled wistfully, "But it's just not in my genes. I mastered pigtails and simple braids, but everything beyond that just overexerts me." He sighed in frustration and stared down at his large hands and broad fingers.

"You're a good dad," Kate squeezed his hand. "It's admirable that you even tried, I'm sure she appreciates that very much."

There was a short pause before Castle spoke up again. "Now you know all my deepest, darkest secrets," he chuckled sadly, referring to his two failed relationships. "Tell me one of yours. What about Louis' dad?"

Kate took a deep breath, she knew this had been coming, yet she didn't know how much to tell him. "Do you want the whole story or just the short version?"

"Whatever you are comfortable with."

She considered him for a moment before making a decision. "I was nineteen when something happened," she started. "It's the reason I became a cop actually." She reached under her sweater and pulled a chain out with an engagement ring attached to it. "My mother was murdered, Castle. She was stabbed." Kate fiddled with the ring around her neck, while Castle processed what he had just learned.

"Kate ...," he started, but she shook her head to stop him. She'd never go through with it if he started comforting her now, and the tears she's battling with, everytime she tells someone about her mother, would win.

"I lived in California at the time but I quit college and moved back to New York where I joined the Force and buried myself in work. I was fine by day, I focused on work and didn't allow myself to think about anything else. But when I came home ... there was no way to stop the onslaught of memories and I so desperately wanted to just _forget_, you know?" She kept playing with the ring around her neck and took a deep breath.

Castle nodded sympathetically and rubbed soothing circles around her ankle.

Nibbling her bottom lip, she continued, "I was never one to sleep around, but I met someone at the Academy and we hooked up." She shook her head at the memory. "We had a purely physical relationship, just sex, no strings attached. I was in a bad place at the time and I must have forgotten to take my pill one day or something, because after a couple of months I noticed I was late, really late. I took a test and found out I was pregnant. I told the guy - David - but he wanted none of it. He didn't care and said I should do what I felt was right, so I decided to become a single mom. And it was the best decision of my life," she told him with a teary smile and finally met his gaze again.

"I bet it was, Louis is wonderful." There was so much compassion in the way he looked at her, a lump formed in her throat. She had made the right decision in telling him. He understood and didn't pry about it. He let her choose how much she wanted to tell him and didn't question her motives, something she was eternally grateful for.

"And now you know my deepest, darkest secrets," she repeated his earlier words, after she had let her words sink in.

"Thank you for telling me," he told her softly, still rubbing her ankle.

Kate only nodded, she was too churned up inside to say anything without starting to cry.

Castle sensed that she needed a minute to compose herself, so he got off the couch. "This calls for a hot chocolate!"

Kate tucked the ring back under her sweater and ran a hand over her face, willing the tears to go away. She took a couple of deep breaths and the lump in her throat slowly shrunk. As promised, only a few minutes later, Castle was back with two steaming mugs. He gave her one and lighted the fireplace before sitting down next to her and wrapping a large blanket around both of them. He silently pulled her into his side and as she rested her head on his shoulder, they both let their minds wander.

She was glad she told Castle about her mother, not many people knew, and only very few knew because Kate had chosen to actually tell them. She was also glad that he knew about Louis' dad, maybe now he could understand better why it meant so much to her that he and Louis spent time together and the boy identified himself with him.

"You know, you truly are amazing," Castle broke the silence all of a sudden.

"If I am so amazing, why won't you introduce me as your date?" Kate mumbled into his shoulder, still absorbed in thought and not filtering what she was saying.

Only when Castle stiffened and moved away from her so he could get a glimpse of her face, she thought about what had just come out of her mouth. Her eyes went wide as she replayed the words.

Castle probably looked just as shocked as her and she mentally slapped herself for being so foolish and letting unfiltered words tumble out of her mouth.

"Is that what you want?" Castle asked her after he regained the ability to speak.

"Castle, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have-," she started to move away from him, her cheeks hot, but he held onto both her shoulders and stopped her movements.

"Is that what you want?", he repeated, his face unreadable.

_Now or never_, she thought and nodded, her cheeks getting even hotter with her admission. "Yes," it was barely above a whisper but Castle understood nevertheless.

He was so relieved he actually laughed as he pulled her against his chest.

"I would love nothing more Kate, believe me," he said with emphasis, his eyes crinkling with joy. "I just didn't know if you were ready for that, yet."

"I didn't either," she blinked up at him, still a little stunned, "But I am."

"So it's a date?" Castle grinned widely.

"It's a date," Kate confirmed, a shy smile spreading across her face.

"There is something else I would love," Castle told her, still holding her against his chest, his gaze flirting down to her lips and up to her eyes again.

"And what is that?" She had a pretty good idea what he was talking about and surprisingly wasn't opposed to it at all. Quite the opposite actually, she wanted him to kiss her.

And he did. Instead of answering her question, he showed her. Cradling her cheek in one hand, he slowly leaned forward, still giving her an out, but continuing to close the distance when her eyes fluttered closed in anticipation. His warm lips were nothing more than a soft glide against hers. Soft and tender. In fact, the whole kiss was so painfully tender that it made her heart ache and swell for the man and his empathy. Way too soon, he pulled away from her, searching her eyes, looking for confirmation that she was alright with this.

She was more than so, but a little too breathless to voice it. Greedily sucking oxygen into her lungs, she stared into the midnight blue of his eyes. What had she ever done to deserve a chance like this?

"I loved that too," she told him, when her mind allowed her to form coherent sentences again.

"Does that mean I get to do this now?" he asked her, his voice full of hope and wonder that they had actually made it this far.

"Suit yourself." She tried to say it nonchalantly, trying to give the impression that this simple kiss did not just knock her out of her stride, but her face betrayed her. Everything about her eyes, the flush on her cheeks and her soft smile practically screamed "whenever you want". He saw it too and pressed his lips to hers once more, a little firmer this time, and the hand that was not cradling her cheek, tangled in her hair while his lips worked on hers.

This time she was the one to pull away. She leaned her forehead against his and grinned widely. "I really loved that."

"Me too," Castle grinned back. "But come on, it's late, let's go to bed. The children are early risers and very active, we can't afford to be unrested."

He quenched the fire while she carried the empty mugs and wine glasses into the kitchen. He found her in the semi-darkness and led her upstairs with his hand on the small of her back, a gesture she loved. At the top of the stairs he gave her one last kiss before walking into his bedroom and closing the door.

With her lips still tingling, Kate stared at herself in the bathroom mirror and shook her head hopelessly at what she saw. _It was just a kiss_, she kept telling herself. Three kisses actually. Three kisses full of promise and hope. She rolled her eyes at herself. _Was she seventeen or twenty-seven?_ After brushing her teeth and changing into her sleep wear, she crawled under the covers of her bed and told herself to go to sleep, willing the butterflies in her belly to do the same.


	12. Chapter 12

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything.**

**Thanks to my dear friend M this story finally has a worthy cover!**

**Chapter 12**

She woke early the next morning when she felt a weight dip into the mattress behind her. Groaning, she turned her head and cracked one eye open, fully expecting to find Louis there, having awoken from a nightmare. But instead, her gaze fell on dark blue eyes and a very goofy grin. Groaning once more, she let her head fall back onto the pillow again.

"Castle, what are you doing in my bed?" she asked with her eyes closed, not ready to let go of her last remnants of sleep just yet.

"Doing something I can do now," he replied somewhat mysteriously with a hint of humor in his voice.

When she didn't react he started playing with a strand of her hair. "Do you want to know what that is?" he asked, leaning over her so he could see her face.

"No," she grumbled and squeezed her eyes closed.

"You're cute when you just woke up."

This time, Kate opened her eyes to glare at him. It was a sleepy glare that didn't have the effect she hoped it would. "Castle, get out of my room," she demanded and made a half-heartedly shooing motion with her arm.

"But don't you want to know what I woke you for?" he pouted.

"Fine." She actually still didn't want to know, but figured this was the only way to get him out of her room and catch another half hour of sleep before the kids awoke.

"I woke you, so I could steal a good morning kiss." He leaned closer to her face, still grinning that goofy grin.

Kate wanted to be angry at him for waking her up this early, she really did, but when she saw his hopeful expression and the grin, she just couldn't. She rolled onto her back and started running a hand through his disheveled hair, that was just as soft as she had always imagined it to be.

"This kiss better be worth waking me at seven on a Sunday."

"Oh, and you're bossy too, I like it," he grinned before capturing her lips in a passionate kiss that left her gasping for air and did all kinds of funny things to her insides.

"So, how did I do?" Castle asked her cockily after he leaned back a couple of inches to get a better look at her face.

"I don't know, maybe you should give it another try." She tried to keep her expression even, tried to keep her lips from spreading into a huge smile that would only inflate his ego further. Something neither he, nor she, were in need of.

"Hah, you wish Detective! In all seriousness though, Alexis is an early riser and seeing me come out of your room might raise some questions," he told her as he got off the bed and moved towards the door. "What do you want for breakfast?"

"Eggs and toast please?"

"It'll be ready in thirty minutes, complete with coffee."

When he left the room, Kate's heart was racing. Not because of the fantastic kiss but because of something he had said. He had mentioned Alexis. Alexis. And Louis. Her pulse quickened even more when she thought of her son and his daughter.

They can't be doing this, they can't hurt either of the children like that. Suddenly feeling trapped under the blankets, Kate got out of the bed and started pacing the room. Neither she nor Castle had a good track record when it came to relationships, they had established that much this weekend. Why should this relationship be any different? She was not a part of his world, she didn't belong in his world, this was foreseen to fail, right? They were too different, this _couldn't_ be working. Nothing in her life had ever worked out, so why should this? Insecurity crept through her, relentless like wildfire. _Great_, she thought with a bitterness that left a bad taste in her mouth, _now I have to end this relationship before it barely even started. _But were they in a relationship? Thinking about it, she realized, she had no idea what they were exactly. They kissed and agreed to go out on a date. _Oh God, the date_, she groaned. What was she thinking?! Checking the time, she quickly dressed herself and went downstairs, hoping to be able to talk to him before anyone else woke up.

She found him standing at the stove, scrambling eggs.

"Hey there," he greeted her, a content smile on his lips.

"Castle, can we talk?" She decided to not beat around the bush and the faster she got this over with, the better.

"That doesn't sound too good," he tried for humor, but it fell flat when he saw the tensity in her back and shoulders.

He turned down the heat of the flame, so he could give her his undivided attention. "What's on your mind?"

"Castle, I have no idea how to say this," she placed a hand in front of her mouth, thinking of the right words before speaking up again, "I don't think we should be doing this. We can't."

"And by 'this' you mean us?" he asked slowly, trying to fully comprehend what she was saying.

Kate nodded her head and opened her mouth to speak but Castle was quicker. "Could we maybe have this talk after breakfast? I can already hear the children," he pointed to the ceiling where the soft thuds of footsteps could be heard, "And they really don't need to hear any of this. I'm sure my mother, once she is awake of course, will keep them occupied, so we can talk without being disturbed."

Kate admired his thoughtfulness and how he always thought of his daughter first. She hoped she could take advantage of that and convince him that they had to put their children first, despite the obvious attraction between them.

Soon enough, bare feet trampled down the stairs.

"Morning daddy, morning Kate," Alexis cheerily greeted her, the buns on the sides of her head somewhat askew.

Louis followed after her, not yet as awake as his friend.

"You have to take my buns out, Kate!"

Kate stood behind the girl and carefully removed the elastics, causing the buns to unfurl into curls.

"They're beautiful, Alexis," Kate told the girl with a smile.

"Yeah?" she asked for reassurance, the corners of her lips slightly tilted up.

Kate nodded in agreement and Alexis turned to her father. "Does our hair look alike, daddy?"

Despite the apparent difference in color, Alexis' hair was much longer than Kate's shoulder-length tresses, but seeing the admiration in his daughter's eyes whenever she looked at the older woman made him nod and smile in agreement.

Breakfast was somewhat strained. The kids didn't pick up on it and chit-chatted happily, but Martha noticed immediately when she appeared at the table.

When everyone had finished, Castle got up. "Mother, could you ...," he pointed at Louis and Alexis, and Martha nodded understandingly. "Oh, of course kiddo. Come on Alexis, Louis," she stood up, motioning for them to do the same, "Let's clear this table and get dressed. We need to enjoy this sunshine and get outside!"

The kids got to work right away and Castle went into the library, obviously trusting for Kate to follow him.

_We seem to have all of the serious talks in this room_, Kate thought and shook her head to refocus on the task on hand. It was important to her to make Castle understand and get her point across.

"Okay Kate, talk to me." Castle closed the door behind her, his arms crossed in front of his chest as if to protect himself from the words that were about to spill from Kate's mouth.

"Do you know how you always say Alexis looks up to me?" Kate began and looked at him for confirmation and when he nodded, a little confused, she continued. "It's the same thing with you and Louis. He doesn't have any male role models in his life, and whenever he is with you, he looks up to you, he admires you. You inspire him and influence him in a positive way. It not only means much to him but to me, too." She stepped a little closer to him, searching his eyes. "It's like you somewhat make up what he's been lacking all of his life, and I don't want him to loose this."

Cluelessness was written all over Castle's features and Kate was quick to explain. "What if this 'us' does not work out? How can we take responsibility for that? How can we justify ourselves to our children?" She was desperate to get him to understand.

"You're right Kate, we can't," Castle replied with an even voice, staring into the distance. "But I'm not ready to let the idea of 'us' go yet." He looked down into her eyes, his own having turned a steely blue. "What if we promised each other that, no matter what happens between us, we will still be there for each other's children? That even if we don't work out, Louis can still come over to the loft after school and Alexis can still come to you when she wants to sport a bun-hawk to school?"

She actually had to chuckle at that mental image but she quickly turned serious again. "Do you really believe that will work?"

"Yes!" He grabbed her hands in both of his and squeezed them. "Yes Kate, I believe it would work. And do you want to know why?" He waited for her to look at him before he continued, "Because we both love our children so much and would put their needs in front of our own hurt any time."

Kate had to agree with that, she would. They both would. "Okay," she breathed. "Promise me."

"Kate, I promise I will never do anything to hurt you or Louis, and no matter what happens, he will always have a friend in me." She searched his face for any trace of doubt, however she only found honesty and a determination that made her heart flutter. In a good way though, knowing, he didn't want to let go of her that easily was good.

Kate nodded and swallowed past the lump that had formed in her throat. He was so good to her. "And I promise you that I will always be there for Alexis."

Desperate to get everything out on the table, she addressed the second reason why they needed to talk.

"Castle, this 'us' ... What are we exactly?"

"We are what ever you want us to be." He looked at her with so much affection and adoration, and maybe a hint of something _more_ brimming in his eyes, it shot straight through her heart. "We will take this slow, as slow as you need it to be and see how it goes for a while before we bring my mother and the kids into the loop. Sound good?"

"Very," Kate smiled softly at him.

"So, are we good?"

"We're good," Kate responded as she wrapped her arms around his waist and pressed a soft kiss to his lips, proving her point.

"Come on then, let's enjoy those last couple of hours we have before we have to go back to the city." He dropped a kiss to her head and led her outside.


	13. Chapter 13

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. **

**Chapter 13**

It was Monday, and happily, Kate still had four days off. After returning from the Hamptons late the day before, she and Castle had planned to spend those four days together as much as possible, exploring their new relationship and building a solid ground it could stand and grow on. So here she was, dropping Louis off at school and waiting for Castle to do the same with Alexis, in order for them to go to Castle's loft together and and spend the morning in each other's company until it was time to pick the kids up from school again.

She finally saw Castle rounding the corner, holding Alexis' hand. She didn't know for how much longer she would have been able to keep standing in front of the school without looking suspicious, Louis having already disappeared inside the building.

"Hi Kate!"

"Good morning Alexis," she greeted the cheerful girl with a quick wave of her hand.

"Bye Kate! Bye daddy!" Alexis let go of her father's hand and sprinted through the gate, her red ponytail fluttering behind her like a flag in the wind.

"Have fun Pumpkin!" Castle called after her, but Kate doubted the girl heard him.

Mindful of the other parents and nannies, they greeted each other a little awkwardly. Not knowing if something as simple as a hug would raise suspicion, they decided to avoid all physical contact and simply started walking. Until they rounded the first corner that is. Before Kate could realize what was happening, Castle had pulled her in for a quick kiss, and before she could even think about responding, he was gone again, taking a step away from her, creating a respectful distance between them.

"Did you have breakfast already?" he asked her, totally ignoring that he just kissed her in public, however quick it may have been.

What? Her mind was stilling spinning from that unexpected kiss and he was asking her about breakfast? How does he do that?

"Ehh ... no, not really," she stammered and started walking again, hurrying to catch up with him.

"Good," Castle grinned, "Because I know this awesome bakery enroute to the loft and I thought we could pick up some pastries and take them home."

"Sounds great," Kate smiled. She loved how thoughtful he was and how he always knew an "awesome place".

They stopped at the aforementioned bakery and Kate picked out a slice of cheesecake, while Castle got himself a chocolate muffin.

Twenty minutes later she sat in Castle's kitchen and got the pastries out of the box and onto a plate while Castle prepared the coffee. He held out a steaming mug to her and she accepted it gratefully. She was about to take a sip when she caught a whiff of the coffee's aroma.

"This does not smell like my usual coffee, Castle. Did you put something in there?" She eyed the coffee suspiciously and swirled it around once, trying to detect the reason for it's different smell.

"It's nothing bad, I promise, but yes, I put something in there."

She slowly took a sip, Castle watching her reaction closely. She was pleasantly surprised when the faint aroma of vanilla warmed her mouth. She really had to pull herself together to prevent a small moan from escaping.

"This is really good Castle, what did you put in there?" she asked him, eyes wide and still a touch of vanilla - and maybe cinnamon? - on her lips.

"A magician never reveals his tricks," he told her with a twinkle in his eye and took a sip of his own coffee, hiding his smug grin effectively.

"Seriously?" She was not amused, this was possibly the best cup of coffee she has had in her entire life and he refused to tell her his secret?

"Seriously." He took a bite out of his muffin and pretended to not be bothered by the way she glared at him. "But I guess you could always cuff and interrogate me," he suggested cheekily around another mouthful of his muffin.

"Or maybe I will just follow the evidence," Kate retorted with a roll of her eyes, already looking around the kitchen for something that smelled or tasted of vanilla.

"You're no fun," Castle mumbled into his own mug.

"What was that?" She quirked an eyebrow at him in amusement.

"I said we should go somewhere fun today."

"M-hhmmm," she hummed in response, not believing a word he said. "Like where?"

"We could go to the Botanical Garden, I heard it's breathtaking in the spring, when the flowers are just starting to blossom."

"That does sound tempting, actually."

Castle immediately retrieved her coat and helped her into it, his hands lingering on her shoulders slightly longer than necessary, before freeing her hair from the collar of the coat.

They hailed a cab and Castle paid for the uneventful ride they had mostly spent in silence. He also bought both their tickets, something for which Kate glared at him. She made a mental note to herself to talk to him about constantly buying her stuff.

They decided on taking the path that led them through the forest part of the garden. A beautiful area where you walked on earthy, uneven ground and had to cross small rivers and step over large roots obstructing the path. It was a little adventurous and probably the reason why Castle liked it so much.

After having taken only a few steps, Kate felt Castle's large fingers wind through her slender ones.

"Castle!" she hissed, slightly confused. Wasn't it only yesterday that they had decided to keep this - whatever they were - to themselves? And here he was holding her hand in public?

Castle must have read her thoughts. "Relax, Kate. Look around us, we're basically alone." He gestured around them with his free hand and he was right, except for an older couple a few yards ahead of them, they were by themselves.

"It's not like the paparazzi are walking around the Botanical Garden, hoping to get a glimpse of someone famous. And even if they were, I've gotten quite good at spotting them, so there's nothing to worry about, least of all in this part of the Garden." He brushed his thumb across her knuckles, a gesture she found very soothing.

Kate had to agree with him, and it's not like he was George Clooney, right? She gave his hand a light squeeze and they continued to stroll through the beautiful flora.

"It's magical," Kate told him as she stopped on the path and looked at the saplings sprouting from the rich soil to her left.

"It is." Castle's voice was low and deep next to her ear. She wasn't quite sure whether he was talking about the green springing from the ground in front of them or something else, but she found she wouldn't terribly mind if he was talking about her, them. She briefly leaned into his side, taking in the sight and enjoying the moment. The rich and venturous scent of Castle assaulting her sense of smell, his warmth against her side, the heaviness of his fingers between hers and young, innocent life blossoming right in front of her. She tried to capture the moment, photograph it with her mind so she could revel in it whenever life got angsty.

She turned her head and found Castle staring at her, something close to wonder on his face. Shooting him a shy smile, she leaned up and captured his lips in a soft kiss.

"What was that for?" he asked after she pulled away.

"No reason." It wasn't true but she had no idea how to tell him how she felt right now. She was happy, so very happy and full of hope of what was to come. To some extent she was still scared of what was developing between them, scared of what would happen if things didn't work out, but she banned those thoughts from her mind for the moment. She still found it incredibly outlandish that Castle felt something for her that was more than just plain friendship, and she wanted to revel in the feeling of being cared for and admired, and didn't want the amazing morning she has had so far be ruined by negativity.

"Well, feel free to kiss me for no reason any time you like," Castle winked at her and put his arm around her shoulders, pulling her into his side and they continued to walk along the path.

When they left the thick cover of the trees, he hooked his pinky in hers, maintaining their physical contact in an innocent enough gesture, that was easy to quickly remove oneself from if necessary, until they got in a cab and went back to the loft.

Inside, Castle helped Kate out of her coat and started the coffee machine. He excused himself when his phone rang and Kate took the chance. Opening the same cabinet she had seen him open earlier this morning, she found herself face to face with various syrups and coffee creamers. She searched the etiquettes for something vanilla-flavored and found two different syrups and a creamer. Sighing with frustration, she grabbed the first syrup and poured a small amount into one of the two mugs she got from another cabinet. Would be ridiculous if she couldn't recreate the coffee Castle had made her in the morning. When she heard footsteps approaching, she quickly put the syrup back and poured the coffee into the cups, blending the syrup with the brown liquid.

"Thank you," Castle said, accepting his cup. "Sorry about that, but Gina is relentless."

"Don't worry about it," she told him as she took a sip of her coffee, having a hard time swallowing the ... absolutely gross-tasting liquid.

"Something wrong?" Castle asked her, noticing her grimacing.

"No, everything's fine," she forced out and turned her focus back to her coffee again. She took another sip, hoping she'd just have to get used to the taste and it wouldn't be as nauseating this time. Gulping, she gave him a not very reassuring smile.

"Oh my God!" Castle suddenly exclaimed and placed his own mug on the counter.

"What?" She looked at him with wide eyes, praying he hadn't noticed anything. But she had no such luck ...

"You used one of my syrups, didn't you?" He was gloating and having a way too good time for her taste.

"I did not!" Kate defended herself insistently but Castle had already snatched her cup out of her hands and taken a large sip, a grimace distorting his face immediately.

"Jeez, how much of that stuff did you put in there?" he asked her, dumping the contents into the sink.

Feeling stupid and a little embarrassed for being caught, Kate turned her back to him. "Just make me a new one, okay?"

Castle once again started the coffee machine and moved to her other side to open the cabinet to get the syrup, but halted mid-air when he saw Kate memorizing his every move. "Turn around."

"What?" she asked, incredulous.

"Turn around!" he insisted.

"What? No! I'm not turning around!"

Castle removed his hand from the handle and crossed his arms over his chest, looking very much like a three-year-old who is refusing to continue walking through the park unless his parents got him something from the ice-cream vendor.

Kate suddenly had the urge to just scream into a pillow and then whack him over the head with it. "Fine," she huffed at last and turned around.

When he presented her a new cup of coffee half a minute later, she had the urge to kiss that smug grin off his face. She decided to glare at him instead, which only made him grin wider and that was the final straw for her. Placing her cup on the counter with a deft thump, she lunged at him, shoving her tongue into his mouth almost roughly. Satisfied when it took him a few seconds to realize what was happening, she nipped at his bottom lip, eliciting a moan from him. He finally caught up with her and took hold of her hips, pulling her against him as he curled his tongue into hers. The next moan that filled the silence of the loft tumbled from her mouth. He tasted like coffee and something dark and just so purely _Castle_ and she was addicted.

When she broke away for air, she simply had to smile at how adorable he looked. He was still a little flabbergasted, his eyes wide with surprise and his lips red and swollen.

He opened and closed his mouth a couple of times as if to say something but not being able to form a sentence. She leaned in again and pressed a soft kiss to his lips. "We need to go and pick up the kids."

"Kids? What ki- Oh, right, the kids," he stammered.

Kate quickly downed her coffee, enjoying the sensation of it mixing with the flavor of Castle that was still lingering on her tongue.

Side by side they started the short walk to Alexis' and Louis' private school, when a thought occurred to Kate. "Castle, we probably shouldn't be arriving at the same time."

"What? Why not?" he turned his head to look at her.

"We already left together and my apartment is in the opposite direction, don't you think it will look suspicious?"

"To whom? To the parents whose eyes are glued to the displays of their phones, or to the poor nannies who end up carrying the school bags and coats of kids that demand they cook them five-star pasta for lunch?"

What he said was most likely to be true, most people probably wouldn't notice. Nobody paid attention to her, she wasn't one of the rich and famous parents, her son simply was one of the few scholarship recipients, but he was Richard Castle and a few of the mothers and nannies did track his every move or force him into conversations. It was public knowledge after all that he was a rich and single dad to an overachieving eight-year-old. People may not pay attention to her, but they definitely did to him.

"Please?" she asked.

"Fine, I'll wait here for a couple of minutes."

"Thank you." She squeezed his hand subtly, not daring to kiss him so close to the school.

"Do I get to see you tomorrow?" His voice was hopeful and she hated to decline him.

"Probably not. Louis has an appointment with the dentist and will be late for first period."

Castle's face fell and Kate did her best to cheer him up. "But I'll see you Wednesday? And we can spend the morning together again?"

That lightened Castle's mood a little. "Sounds good. And now go, Louis and Alexis will be waiting." He gave her hand one last squeeze before he let go and she rounded the corner.


	14. Chapter 14

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything.**

**Since I'm stuck at home with a broken toe, expect quite a few updates over the next few days!**

**Chapter 14**

As promised, Kate came home with him again the following Wednesday. They stopped at the bakery and picked up some breakfast and then sat down at Castle's kitchen counter to down it with his special, vanilla-flavored coffee she still didn't know how to prepare.

"Kate, I was thinking," Castle started the conversation carefully. "Maybe Friday isn't such a good idea."

"The gala opening?" she asked and Castle nodded. "I've been thinking the same thing, actually."

"Introducing you as my date kind of defeats the whole purpose of keeping this," he motioned between him and her with the hand not currently holding his muffin, "Out of the public."

Kate nodded in agreement. "It seems I didn't quite think this through on Saturday. What are you going to do instead?" she asked, remembering the conversation they had had about him going to these kinds of events a few days ealier.

"I'll just go there by myself," he told her with a steady voice and broke off another piece of his muffin.

"But you said -"

"I know what I said," Castle interrupted her softly. "It's not a problem. I think I can ward those over-zealous women off one more time. And besides," he added after a small pause, "I want to take you somewhere more romantic for our first date."

She wasn't opposed to the idea. Making a public appearance with Castle didn't sound appealing at all anymore. She had no idea what had gotten into her that Saturday. "Did you have something specific in mind?"

"Actually, I did. And I want to take you there. This Saturday. It's not a very public place so we should be fine."

"If you're sure?" she asked, still not quite grasping the fact that he wanted to go on a date with her.

"More than." He emphasized his statement with a kiss to her lips. "Do you have someone to babysit Louis? Because you could bring him over and my mother could watch both the kids. I'm sure she won't mind."

"And what do I tell her when she asks why we dressed up?" she asked him dryly.

"Right, bad idea."

Kate hummed in agreement. "I'll ask Rosa if she can take him. When I was still an officer and pulled the night shift, he used to sleep over at her place. It should not be a problem."

"Alright then. I'll pick you up at seven?"

"Sounds fine," she confirmed with a soft smile.

XXX

It was seven o' clock sharp when she heard a knock on her door. Casting one last glance at herself in the mirror, she smoothed some imaginary wrinkles out of her navy blue dress and went to open the door in one fluid motion.

"Hey," she gave Castle a soft smile.

In response, he mutely handed her a small bouquet of flowers and Kate had to fight the urge to chuckle. He was adorable, especially when speechless, she could now admit that to herself.

She gratefully accepted the flowers. "Come on in, I'll be ready in a sec."

He entered her apartment, and she went to place the flowers in a vase. From her spot in the kitchen, she inconspicuously took him. He wore a suit that fit him nicely and a ... navy blue dress shirt. She didn't know whether to find the fact that they matched cute, in an absolutely nauseating way, or rather unnerving. Dismissing the thought, she quickly went into her bedroom to get her heels before meeting Castle, who had finally found his tongue, back in the living room.

"You look incredible," he told her warmly as she approached him, now almost as tall as he was. She inwardly sighed with relief. She had stood in front of her closet longer than she'd liked to admit and hoped the simple, navy blue dress, that hugged her body in all the right ways, was neither too much nor too little. She'd accessorized it with a silver bracelet and matching earrings and had carefully twisted her hair into a loose bun, which accented her long neck even more. The look was simple yet elegant and she was glad he seemed to approve.

"You look mighty fine yourself, Castle." She tipped her head up and pressed a soft kiss to his lips, but pulled away before he could deepen the kiss, in fear his wandering hands might ruin her hair.

"Where are you taking me?" she finally asked as he helped her into her coat.

"You'll just have to wait and see," Castle told her as he linked his arm with hers.

Outside her apartment building was a car waiting for them, the driver already holding open the door for them. "You called your car service?"

"We all need some luxury in our lives, don't we?" he winked and ushered her into the car.

The drive was short and comfortable in the smooth-going town car. Castle softly circled the skin of the back of her hand with his thumb and she casted long glances at the profile of his face. The manly slope of his nose, the sharp angle of his jaw and those full lips, that could elicit the most sinful noises from her. If he registered her staring, he pretended not to notice.

When the car finally came to a stop, they found themselves in front of a small Italian restaurant. "This is one of my favorites. It's nothing special but it's private and so very good." Castle smiled at her as he took her hand to help her out of the car.

"It looks lovely, Castle," Kate replied with a smile of her own.

When they entered the maître d' led them to a cozy table near the end of the restaurant, somewhat hidden from the entrance. It was a relatively simple restaurant and that's what Kate liked about it. She was glad Castle hadn't taken her to one of those overly fancy restaurants where a bottle of sparkling water had its price in the double digits and she would most likely have felt uncomfortable, knowing that she'd never be able to afford a single meal there on her cop's salary. The thought that he seemed to know her so very well let the butterflies in her stomach come to live once again.

"Have I told you how beautiful you look tonight"? Castle asked her once they'd taken their seats.

"You may have mentioned it." She knew she was blushing, but how could she not? It's not everyday that a man as handsome as Richard Castle complimented her. She looked up to find him smiling at her, his thumb once again tracing circles on the back of her hand on the table. They both knew this was as close to accepting the compliment as it got tonight and he accepted that with a smile. He would love to convince her of her beauty more fully, but a public place like this was not the place for that, not with Kate Beckett who found it hard to accept anything close to a compliment in general.

"What did you eventually end up telling Louis?" Castle asked once the moment had passed.

"I told him I was going out with some friends." She averted her gaze and started playing with her napkin. "I don't like lying to him, even when it's for his own good."

Castle gave her hand a soft squeeze. "I completely understand, I don't like it either."

That made Kate finally look up. "What did you tell your family?"

"I told them I was going to a party. Alexis bought it, but I'm not so sure about my mother," he noted vaguely.

"Does she suspect?" She nervously nibbled on her bottom lip, only stopping when the artificial taste of lip gloss assaulted her taste buds.

"Hard to say. She gave me this look. You know, the look that says 'I'm your mother, I know you're hiding something'?"

Kate nodded and he continued, "She gave me that one, but didn't ask any questions."

He must have seen her worrying her bottom lip, a tell-tale sign that something was bothering her, because he gave her hand another soft squeeze.

"Kate," he waited for her to look at him, "Don't worry about it, she doesn't know and I'll make sure it stays that way," he told her with firm belief in his voice.

She wasn't entirely convinced but gave him a smile anyway.

"But let's not talk about my mother please," he made a face and Kate laughed just as their server brought their plates and they dug in.

"This is fantastic, Castle!" Kate exclaimed after trying the gnocchi she had ordered.

"I'm glad you like them," he gave her a soft smile. "I really like this place and sure hope to come back here with you again one day."

She had just taken a sip of her wine and only barely managed not to choke on it. She took a deep breath and smiled at him because no, she was not totally freaking out right now just because he told her he wanted to take her out for dinner again in the future. No, she was totally calm. Or that's what she kept telling herself.

"So, how was the gala opening yesterday?" She tried to ask it nonchalantly and tried not to think about how she had spent large parts of the evening before wondering how many women had flung themselves at him and how she had been a little jealous even though she had no right to be and wasn't the type to be so anyway.

"The art displayed was very interesting but the company could have been better." He gave her an honest smile along with a knowing look and just like that she felt totally ridiculous about her behavior the night before.

"The next time you have to go somewhere like that, I'll accompany you."

"Promise?" He actually looked so hopeful she had to laugh.

"Promise." This time she gave his hand a soft squeeze to emphasize her words.

They spent the rest of the dinner in comfortable conversation. They talked a little about Kate's co-workers, Esposito and Ryan, the newcomer who had just been promoted and was a little clumsy but still very sweet and they talked about the current series Castle was writing, the _Derrick Storm_. novels. She secretly loved them, just like the rest of his work, but she would never tell him that. His ego didn't need any further inflating. But he knew she was a fan, he had found that out the second time they had met.

They rounded their dinner off with a portion of a sinfully rich tiramisu which they shared. In the past Kate had always rolled her eyes at couples that would share dessert and have eye-sex while feeding their significant other, but now, doing exactly all of those things, she secretly loved it.

After finishing up and taking care of the bill, Castle pulled her against his side and led her outside the restaurant and up the street. "You up for some dancing?" he asked, looking down at her.

She stiffened against his side. "I'm not much of a dancer actually, Castle," she admitted quietly and averted her eyes, not wanting to see the disappointment in his eyes. He was old-school when it came to dating, and they had already kissed before the first date so had definitely counted on taking her out for dinner and some dancing to at least do something by the book.

"But dancing is obligatory for a first date! How else am I going to sweep you off your feet?" he pouted.

"Oh, I just happen to know a way," she told him seductively before tilting her head up and pressing her lips to his. She was taking a risk, but she figured that in the dark, nobody would be able to recognize them and the neighborhood they were currently in wasn't known for celebrities roaming the streets. Castle responded immediately, placing one hand on the small of her back to pull her closer and using the other to angle her head, his tongue tracing her lips. She parted them without hesitation, moaning at the taste of him. Rich like the tiramisu they had just shared and fruity like the wine they'd drunk.

"See," she told him with a wide grin, after she had pulled away to prevent turning blue from lack of oxygen, "Totally swept me off my feet."

He grinned back at her. "If that's all it takes, I will make sure to sweep you off your feet more often from now on." He fortified his statement with another soft kiss to her lips, before pulling her into his side again. "Come on, let's take you home, you must be freezing in this short dress."

She wasn't, the heat of his lips on hers had made her immune to the cold March night, but she didn't tell him that, she liked being snuggled into his side, although she would never admit that if being asked.

He flagged down a taxi and held the door open for her to scoot in before him. He gave the driver the address of her apartment building and slid close to her, his warm palm resting above her knee, right at the hemline of her dress.

As the cab drove through the still busy streets of New York, her thoughts were going a mile a minute. She was reluctant to let the evening end, she had had a great time, and Louis was gone all night and she wanted to take advantage of that, but she was afraid that if she asked him upstairs for a cup of coffee, the evening would evolve into something she wasn't quite ready for.

"Penny for your thoughts," Castle murmured low against her ear.

Kate turned her head and smiled at him meekly. She didn't really want to voice her thoughts, afraid of sounding like a fourteen-year-old school girl, but she still needed to somehow solve this problem.

"If I invited you up for coffee," she started carefully, "Would you be okay with it, if that were the only thing we would be having tonight?" She forced herself to look at him, make him see what she was feeling.

He smiled at her softly. "Of course. Your pace, remember?" his words were laced with such honesty it made her heart ache.

"Wanna come up for coffee then?" she asked him shyly just as the cab stopped in front of her building.

"I would love to."

Castle took care of the fare, something that wasn't missed by Kate. "I asked you out for a date, remember? Meaning I'll pay." He took her hand again, giving it a squeeze to reassure her.

"Fine," she grumbled, still having a hard time accepting things.

She unlocked the door to her apartment and invited him in. Inside, she slipped out of her heels, shrinking a few inches in the process. Castle grabbed two cups out of the cabinets while she turned on the coffee machine. She loved how he wasn't the least bit insecure in her home and simply knew his way around. She had always liked confidence in men.

When she returned from putting her shoes away, Castle was standing by the large window in her living room, sipping his coffee. She joined him, and with her temple against his shoulder, they watched the cars drive by on the street below them. He rested his hand on her hip, pulling her a little closer and they stayed like that, content of simply being in the presence of the other, staring out the window. When Castle turned away to place his empty cup on a coffee table nearby, she missed his warmth instantly. But when he turned back to her, he wrapped both his arms around her and pulled her against the solidness of his chest, holding her captive in the heat of his body, which was so much better. She returned the favor and placed both her hands on his chest, fingering the small buttons of his shirt while breathing him in.

She never wanted this moment to end. Being surrounded by the scent of him and coffee in the comfortable silence of her apartment at the dead of night, his broad chest under her cheek and fingertips and the slight swaying from side to side to a melody only he knew.

She felt him press a kiss to her head and looked up at him. He was looking at her with so much unbridled affection and adulation it made her head spin.

"I should probably go," he said softly into the stillness of her apartment but made no move to extricate himself from her. He was obviously just as reluctant to let this evening end as she was.

"Stay." The word was out of her mouth before she had the chance to think about it twice. She found his eyes again and detected confusion but also surprise shimmering in them. He clearly had not expected this. And neither did she, truth be told.

Determined not to show how her own request had taken her by surprise, she forced her voice to be steady. "You can stay if you want," she told him again.

He took a moment to think about her offer. "I'll have to leave quite early so I can slip into the loft before my mother or Alexis wake up," he told her quietly.

She pulled back a little from their embrace so she could see him better. She hadn't thought of his family at all. "You don't have to, Castle. Stay here I mean," she clarified. "I don't want to make things more complicated."

"You're not. I just didn't want you to be confused when you wake up in the morning and I'm gone."

She smiled softly at him. "Does that mean you're staying?"

"I guess it does," he smiled back. "Are you tired yet?"

"A little," she admitted.

He took her hand in his and started walking through the living room. "Let's go to bed then." But he stopped dead in his tracks when he became aware of the fact that he didn't actually know where her bedroom was.

"Uhh, lead the way."

"Come on," she laughed and led him down the hall.

The dominant colors of her room were beige and purple and Castle made a mental note of that. He had noticed that she often wore purple and it was always good to know the favorite color of the person you ... really cared about. He didn't dare to think of her as more yet.

Kate came out of the en-suite and gave him a spare toothbrush. They stood side by side at the sink and held eye contact through the mirror. While his eyes conveyed happiness, she tried to not let insecurity shine in hers. _What were you thinking? _she accused her reflection. She would need to strip out of her dress, something he surely wanted to assist with, since the task of pulling down the zipper on her back was a little difficult by herself, though not impossible, and she would need to put her pajamas on, and she would need to remove her make-up, and so on.

She rinsed her mouth, careful not to get any water on her dress. When she stood straight again to place her toothbrush in its holder, Castle was already behind her, his fingers toying with the zipper of her dress. "Do you need help with that?"

Through the mirror she stiffly nodded at him and he slowly started to pull the zipper down. He stopped when he was about halfway down and reached for her hand, twisting it around her back and bringing it in contact with the zipper.

"Think you can do the rest by yourself?" he asked, his voice low against her ear.

She nodded and shot him a grateful smile through the mirror. That sweet, sweet man.

He pressed at kiss to her top most vertebrae and then pointed at the bedroom. "I'll just ...," he motioned something unrecognizable with his hands before disappearing into the adjacent room.

She pulled the zipper the rest of the way down and let the dress pool around her feet on the floor.

She reached her hand out to the towel rack, a place where she normally kept her pajamas when she changed in the bathroom, but she felt ... nothing. Her pajamas were still in her bedroom, neatly tucked away under her pillow. Asking Castle to stay the night had completely thrown her off her game and confused her nightly ritual, starting with brushing her teeth while still wearing her dress and now forgetting about her PJs.

Gritting her teeth, she forced herself to think of a way out. She could just walk into her bedroom in her underwear, grab her pajamas, pull them on, sleep with her bra on, something she absolutely hated, and pretend not to notice the looks Castle would surely be shooting her way, or she could ...

"Castle?"

"Were you looking for these?" A hand appeared through the slit of the open door, her PJs dangling off its fingers. "Found them when I was turning down the bed."

What exactly had she done again to meet such an honest and caring man?

"Thank you," Kate grabbed the pieces of clothing and hoped he could detect the gratefulness in her voice.

She quickly got rid of her bra, pulled on the sleep shorts and the baggy t-shirt and removed her make-up.

Castle was already waiting for her, wearing nothing but his boxers and his undershirt. "I found your pajamas under the pillow on the left side, but I didn't want to assume ...," he explained his irresolute standing around.

"You can pick your favorite side, I usually just sleep in the middle."

"I'll leave you the left side then?" he asked as he moved over to the right side.

"Fine with me." The left was her favorite actually and she was happier about the fact that he preferred the right side than she should be.

They both got under the covers and lied on their backs, a foot of space between them and an awkward silence hanging around the room.

She wanted to be closer to him but didn't know how to do so without appearing needy. She wasn't needy. She was a strong, independent woman.

"Thank you, Castle," she finally broke the silence, still staring at the ceiling.

"For what?"

"For probably being the most respecting and understanding human being tonight. And for knowing exactly what I needed. Not a lot of men would have done what you did," she told him, meaning every word.

"For you, Kate? Always." His words were laced with the same honesty as hers had been. He turned to face her and started playing with a strand of her hair. "If you're not a dancer, are you at least a cuddler?" She could see him waggle his eyebrows suggestively in the dark.

"No, I'm not," she told him and it was the truth. She had never felt the urge to cuddle or snuggle or huddle up to someone, her son excluded. "But for you I'll make an exception," she said with a grin and scooted closer to him, lying her head on his chest. He pulled her closer with an arm around her shoulders and whispered, "Good night, Kate."

She leaned up and pressed a kiss to his lips. "Sweet dreams."

He chuckled. "I'm positive I'll have the sweetest of them all."

She smiled into his chest before sleep pulled her under.


	15. Chapter 15

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything.**

**Chapter 15**

It was still dark outside when Castle's alarm went off the next morning. He carefully pulled his arm away from under Kate's head and silenced it. Getting up slowly, trying not to jostle her too much, he started to put on his clothes from the day before, which had been neatly piled up on top of Kate's dresser. Finishing with the last button of his shirt, he turned around to take one last look at the beautiful woman he just woke up next to and found her staring at him. Apparently he hadn't been as quiet as he thought he had been.

Smiling softly, he went over to her side of the bed and leaned down to press his lips against her forehead. "Go back to sleep, Kate." She blinked at him twice before her lids stayed closed and he silently made his way out of her apartment with a little more bounce to his step than normal.

It was almost six when the cab pulled up in front of his apartment building. Knowing he wouldn't be able to go back to sleep and Alexis would be awake in less than two hours, he decided to write. His latest _Derrick Storm _was in its final stages and it wasn't long before it would be published.

In the loft, Castle changed into his pajamas to at least create the illusion he'd been home for hours and slept in his own bed, before starting to type.

It wasn't long before a pair of tiny sock less feet pattered down the stairs, going the direction of his bedroom and thus his office. No doubt it was Alexis, wanting to snuggle up with him for another twenty minutes or so. She looked adorable when she came to stand in front of his desk. Her nightgown was wrinkly, her hair a tangled mess and she clutched her monkey-bunkey, a brown stuffed monkey, almost as old as she was, to her chest, while rubbing her eyes with her left hand.

"Good morning, Pumpkin," Castle greeted her and pushed his chair away from his desk and held out his arms, and Alexis immediately clambered onto his lap, curling herself into his chest while he held her tightly. He pressed a kiss to her hair and simply breathed her in. He loved those early Sunday mornings where she got all cuddly. He knew he shouldn't hold it against her and that she was growing up, but it always stung a little when she refused to let him kiss her in front of the school or pulled her hand out of his when they turned onto the street the school was located on. Therefore he cherished those moments at home, where she came to him for a cuddle, all the more.

He decided to get a little more comfortable, so he picked her up and walked to the couch in the living room, where he lied down, with her still curled against him. He pulled a blanket over them both and closed his eyes, taking a quick catnap as Alexis did the same.

About twenty minutes later, he felt her wiggle against him and he opened his eyes to find her grinning at him. "Wake up sleepy! You have to feed me!"

"Sleepy? You fell asleep before me." Castle lovingly tweaked her nose and stood up, not letting her go. "And you better help me prepare breakfast."

He carried her into the kitchen where he sat her down on the counter next to the toaster.

"You are in charge of the toast and I'll prepare the eggs," he told her as he handed her a package of the bread.

The duo performed a well-practiced dance around the kitchen. It was clear they had perfected this breakfast ritual years ago.

Castle had just finished pressing fresh oranges for a juice for Martha, her favorite drink for breakfast, when she floated into the kitchen, wearing an eye cancer-causing turquoise robe.

"Good morning, kiddos," the diva greeted them, looking fresh and wide-awake despite the early hour.

"Morning, mother," her son replied, scrambling eggs.

"Good morning, grams."

When the last piece of bread was skillfully toasted by Alexis, the Castle-Rodgers clan carried the full plates and glasses to the table.

"I didn't hear you come home last night, must've been relatively early," Martha told him with a look Castle couldn't quite place.

He shrugged his shoulders and tried to act casual. "I was just quiet." Before she could question him any further, he quickly changed the topic. "How was your evening?"

"Fun," Alexis giggled. "Grams brought home a few of her costumes and we tried them on. Some of them look very ridiculous." She giggled harder at the memory and some of the egg from her fork dropped down onto her plate. "Especially the hats with the feathers on them."

And with that, the topic of his whereabouts the last night were off the table.

After breakfast he called Kate, he couldn't wait to see her again and they decided to have a movie night, complete with pizza and popcorn on Friday of the following week, when she was not on call and could bring Louis.

XXX

Alexis was off the couch on Friday before Castle could even register that someone had knocked on the door.

The little girl skidded to the door and threw it open, cheerily greeting their guests. When Castle walked up behind her, he saw that she had thrown her arms around Kate's waist and hugged her_. _If it was okay for her to do that, it was okay for him to do that as well, right? When Alexis finally released Kate and went on to properly greet Louis, Castle pulled Kate in for a hug, ignoring the shocked expression that crossed her features. Friends hugged, right? And as far as the children were concerned, they were friends. After a moment of stiffness, Kate relaxed against him and returned the hug. Unobtrusively, he pressed a quick kiss to her hair before whispering, "Hey."

She looked up at him and smiled softly. "Hey back."

He released her and mussed up Louis' hair lovingly, making Alexis giggle when his hair stood up at odd angles. Kate quickly smoothed it down again and closed the door behind them.

"I took the liberty of already ordering pizza, it should be here any minute," Castle announced. He already knew what their favorites were from the time they had had some in the Hamptons.

"Why don't you and Alexis pick a movie?" he asked Louis and pointed at a shelf in the living room which was stacked with DVDs. Then he looked at Kate and gestured at the kitchen. "Help me with the plates?"

She followed him and when he was sure the kids were absorbed in choosing a movie, he pulled her in for a quick kiss.

"Castle-," Kate started to complain, but he silenced her with another quick kiss.

"They're not looking," he told her and pressed his lips to hers for a third time. "I missed you."

She quirked an eyebrow at him. "You just saw me yesterday morning."

"Yeah," Castle snorted, "In front of the school, with a distance of ten feet between us and no way I could touch you."

"Well, you touched me just now."

"Not enough," he growled quietly and placed his hands on her hips to pull her closer. "It'll never be enough."

He wanted to kiss her, really kiss her, but didn't want to push his luck. Instead he sought out her eyes, hoping she could read everything he wasn't able to say or do right now in them.

She met his eyes, a soft smile tugging on her lips. Apparently she understood.

There was another knock on the door, and he quickly removed himself from her, grabbed his wallet and got their pizzas, while she grabbed four plates from the cabinets and carried them out into the living room.

"We picked _Lilo & Stitch_!" Alexis exclaimed when the adults joined her and Louis on the couch.

Castle handed Louis and Alexis each a plate and went back into the kitchen to get some water. He gestured at the couch and caught Kate's eye. "Sit where ever you want to."

She plopped down in the middle and Louis immediately sat down on her right, Alexis on her left. Castle sat down next to Alexis and simply enjoyed being with three of his four favorite people.

Halfway through the movie, Alexis got up from the couch, telling them she would go and get some juice. As soon as she disappeared behind the open door of the fridge, Castle scooted to his right, taking her place and therefore sitting right next to Kate.

She shot him an amused grin and Castle grabbed a large blanket, throwing it over Louis' and both their laps, so he could tangle his fingers with hers underneath it without anyone noticing.

When Alexis returned from the kitchen, she shot her dad a questioning glance.

"Move your feet, lose your seat," he sing-songed and playfully struck his tongue out at her.

"Daddy," the redhead giggled before climbing into his lap and leaning back against his chest. He used his left arm to hug her to his chest and pulled his right hand out from under the blanket, lying his arm around Kate's shoulders instead, tickling the side of Louis' neck with his fingertips. The boy giggled and looked at him, making Castle smile in return.

Kate turned her face to shoot him a loving smile, rubbing the outer seam of his jeans with her thumb in gratitude for making the boy feel so at ease in his home and including him, especially when his shyness held him back.

When the movie was over, it was just after seven and Alexis was still wide awake.

"Can we play a game?" she asked.

Castle looked at Kate and Louis to check if they felt up for it and both nodded. "Sure, why don't you go and get one?"

Alexis hopped off his lap and ran up the stairs while Castle moved about to collect the empty plates. After stacking them in the sink, he met the others back in the living room, Alexis hiding both her hinds behind her back, holding something.

"What did you choose?"

"This!" she exclaimed and showed them her choice.

"Oh no," Castle groaned. "You just want to embarrass me in front of Kate and Louis, don't you?"

Alexis giggled. "It's not my fault you're so inflexible."

Alexis turned to Kate and Louis and held up the game of _Twister_. "Is it okay if we play this game?" she asked them.

Behind her back, Castle shook his head violently, hoping Kate would get the hint and tell Alexis no. Kate caught his gaze and smirked. Not a good sign.

"Of course we can Alexis, it's been ages since I last played."

This must be his payback for when he kissed her in the kitchen.

"Great!" the girl cheered and went to set up the game. She spread out the white mat with the green, yellow, blue and red dots and grabbed the spinner.

"I'll spin first, and you three can go," she told the others and took a seat on the couch.

They stood by the side of the mat when Castle suddenly started jumping slightly up and down, shaking first his left, then his right leg, loosening his muscles.

"You must be older than I thought you were," Kate mused, her eyebrows raised in disbelief at his actions. "Only _old_ people stretch for a game of _Twister_."

"But he is old," Alexis giggled from her spot on the couch, "He's thirty."

"Hey, I am doing this for you," he told his daughter, referring to his stretching. "After all, you would be the one who would need to nurse me back to health after I pull a muscle."

"Please don't pull a muscle daddy, not again," Alexis told him with wide, crystal-blue eyes. "Having to do that once was already bad enough." Kate let out a low laugh from behind her fingers that she had pressed against her lips, and before Castle could defend himself and tell them that he had simply slipped on the mat and almost done an involuntary split, Alexis span the hand of the spinner and announced, "Left hand green."

Obediently, Castle, Kate and Louis all placed their left hands on a green dot right in front of them.

"Left foot red," was the next instruction. While Kate gracefully reached out for the red dot on the opposite side of the mat, Castle had a little more trouble. All the good dots were taken and his two dots were diagonally across from each other, meaning he had to stretch his limbs out at an odd angle.

They stretched and reached out, over and under each other, placing their hand and feet on the different dots without trying to lose their balance. Louis was the first one to fall on his butt. The boy simply had the disadvantage of having shorter legs than the other two and couldn't reach one of the dots. He got off the mat and sat down next to Alexis, helping her with the spinner.

With the next instruction, Kate decided to impress Castle a little. With one foot on a green dot, she placed her other on the blue dot the farthest away from her, basically doing a split but without letting her pelvis touch the floor, both of her hands on a yellow dot in front of her, supporting her weight.

"Holy shit, you're flexible!" Castle exclaimed with wide eyes when he saw what she was doing.

She smirked at him, seeming totally relaxed while his own face was probably red from exertion already.

Louis told them to place their left hand on a green dot. Kate reached behind her with one hand, placing it on the green dot closest to her. For Castle it wasn't as easy. He was currently in front of her, facing her front, but the length of her body blocked out most of the green dots from his position. He could either reach around her and stretch very awkwardly, and probably fall flat on his face in the process, or he could reach one hand under her thigh and place his hand on a green dot basically beneath her.

Not wanting to give her the satisfaction of face-planting, he opted for option two. He flattened out his palm to squeeze it in the space between Kate's thigh and the mat. It was a tight fit and the back of his palm softly brushed the underside of her thigh.

"What are you doing?" Kate hissed and a little startled he looked up at her face.

She had closed her eyes shut and now her face, too, was flushed. Her breathing was shallow and when she opened her eyes again to look at him, he was so taken aback by the lust swimming in the now green irises, he forgot all about his body tension and crumbled to the floor, landing on his stomach with an _oomph_.

"And Kate's the winner!" Alexis announced and clapped.

With feline grace, Kate got her feet under the center of her body and got off the mat, leaving Castle lying there, his hands and legs buried beneath him, looking somewhat like a newborn calf that had tried to take its first steps before learning how to coordinate its long limbs.

"The winner could at least help the loser up," he pouted, but Kate only laughed.

"Now you're also too old to get up by yourself?" She bent down to him, offering him a hand, and when he grabbed it, she pulled him up and whispered in his ear, "I sure hope you have more stamina in other ... activities." She seductively pulled her bottom lip into her mouth and looked up at him through her lashes, while Castle just gaped at her, all coherent thought having left his brain.

It took him a few seconds to recover, but when he finally did, he waggled his eyebrows and smirked at her. "Getting bold, are we? I like it."

"It's my turn now!" Alexis jumped between them and pointed a finger at her dad, "And you're going down!"

"Challenge accepted!" he told his daughter with the same enthusiasm.

This time it was Castle, Kate and Alexis waiting for Louis to give them their first instruction.

He told them to place their right foot on a red spot and Alexis threw herself into the game with eagerness.

Castle knew he didn't stand a chance against Kate and Alexis. Kate seemed to be very flexible and was able to reach almost all dots from any position on the mat with her long legs, and Alexis was wiry and deft.

At one point, Kate was doing something similar to the downward dog pose, they'd teach you about in yoga classes. With her hands and feet placed squarely under her and her butt lifted high in the air, right in Castle's field of vision and reach, he found he just couldn't resist.

She shot him a warning glance that told him to not do anything stupid, but when she looked at Louis again, waiting for him to continue, Castle lifted one hand off the ground and playfully smacked her right on that delicious butt of hers. Just hard enough to make her yelp out in surprise and topple over, making both children laugh.

"Payback's a bi-," he told her, grinning widely, but he bit his lip just in time before the word slipped out. When both Alexis and Louis shot him curious glances, he quickly finished his sentence, "Bee. Payback's a bee," he said, praying, the kids wouldn't ask any questions.

He shot Kate a helpless glance but she only clamped her lips together, trying to contain her laughter. He was relieved to see she didn't take offense at his actions.

Louis asked them to place their left hand on a yellow dot and Alexis stretched her hand out as far as she could. Her sweater rode up slightly and revealed an inch of the smooth skin of her belly, which was currently pointing at the ceiling.

Sensing his chance, Castle leaned over her and breathed out against the skin of her belly, making the girl giggle and fall on her back.

"And it looks like I'm the winner!" Castle announced before starting to tickle his daughter on the floor.

"You cheated!" the eight-year-old protested in-between bouts of laughter.

"Did not! After all I need to breathe!" he defended himself.

It was clear Alexis didn't believe him, but she let it go and he helped her onto her feet, just in time to see Louis hiding a yawn in his mother's side.

"Someone's getting sleepy, huh?"

The boy looked up at him and nodded, the tiredness evident on his face.

"We should probably get going," Kate said. "It soon must be bedtime for you, too?" Kate asked Alexis and ran her hand through the girl's long hair.

"Daddy says I can go to bed whenever I want, but I never go later than half past eight."

"I'm glad someone has a sense of responsibility in this household," Kate laughed as she moved towards the front door of the loft.

"I'm going to ignore that comment," Castle grumbled as he got his guests coats and helped the tired boy into his.

"Well, I hope you had fun and we can repeat that some time?" Castle directed his question at Louis.

"I had fun," Louis confirmed, "And I really want to do this again."

Castle was glad to hear that. Sometimes it was very hard for him to read the shy boy who guarded his emotions so carefully.

"But next time without the cheating, Mr. Castle." Kate gave him a pointed look and Alexis copied her and crossed her hands on front of her chest.

"Exactly."

"I wasn't cheating!", Castle protested, bringing his hands up in front of him. "I only needed to-"

"Breathe, I know," Kate cut him off, before continuing a little dryly, "And push me. Right."

He gave her his best innocent puppy-dog eyes and pretended to not know what she was talking about.

Luckily, Louis came to his help as he yawned again.

"This discussion is not over," Kate told Castle and gave Alexis a quick wave as she opened the door and stepped into the hallway, Louis holding her hand tightly.

"See you soon," she smiled at the two Castle's who waved back at her.

"See you soon, Kate."

* * *

_Thoughts? I'd love to hear them!_


	16. Chapter 16

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything.**

**Chapter 16**

It was just after ten PM one week later when he knocked on her door. He had just had dinner with Gina, as his publisher, not his ex, and talked about editing some minor things in his book, when she had mentioned his birthday party and he had realized he had yet to invite Kate. Since he was in the neighborhood already, he had decided to drop by. He knew, if she was at home, she would still be awake. She called him some nights when they hadn't been able to see each other that day and it was always ridiculously late when she did so.

He softly knocked on the door, mindful of Louis who was probably already asleep.

The door opened and a tired and slightly confused Kate Beckett smiled at him.

"Hey Castle." She opened the door wider and bid him inside. "What are you doing here?"

"First of all, is Louis in bed?"

She nodded and Castle let out a relieved breath. He quickly covered the distance between them and caught her lips in a soft kiss, his hands cradling her face. Two days without kissing her were two too many.

"I was in the neighborhood when I realized I needed to ask you something," he answered her question after pulling away from her but still holding her close with his hands on her hips.

"Oh, what's that?" he asked suddenly, only now seeing the dozens of papers and photographs and crime scene reports strewn around the coffee table in Kate's living room.

She turned in his embrace to figure out what he was talking about. "You probably shouldn't be looking at those," she told him with a disapproving look and started to stack the papers before placing them in brown manila folders, shielding their contents from his curious eyes.

"It's the case I'm currently working on," she sighed once she stood upright again. "We caught it two days ago and we're getting nowhere." She ran a hand through her hair out of frustration, her face a mask of distress. "Every lead we had turned out to be a dead end and every possible suspect has a solid alibi." She started pacing the living room, clearly worked up, her eyebrows knitted together in irritation.

She came to stand in front of her large living room window and looked down at the cars passing by. "It's just so ... ugh!" she growled, and pent-up tension caused her to ball her hands into tight fists. It bothered Castle to see her so irritated and he decided to do something about it. He walked up behind her and placed his hands on her shoulders.

"Hey, hey," he said softly as his thumbs worked themselves into the tight knots of her upper back. Kate stiffened at first but rapidly relaxed as he continued his ministrations. She let out a sigh that came from the depths of her very being and let her head hang down, giving him access to her neck. He swiped her hair over her shoulder and continued massaging her neck.

When her neck was thoroughly kneaded through, he slowly lifted her blouse a bit, testing the waters, and placed his warm hands on her lower back, just waiting for her to stiffen again or any other sign showing she was uncomfortable with this much touching.

"Okay?" he asked her, when she remained motionless. She hummed her approval and he started working along the bony protrusions of her spine.

She broke the silence after a couple of minutes, her voice slightly slurred. "What was it again you wanted to ask me?"

He looked at her over her shoulder and smiled at what he saw. Her chin was resting against her chest and her eyes were closed in pleasure, her face completely relaxed and slack.

"I'm throwing a birthday party on Tuesday and wanted to know whether or not you're coming," he told her, his voice low.

She let out a sleepy chuckle. "Your birthday is on April Fools Day?"

"Awesome, right?" Castle grinned, obviously delighted at that fact. "So, are you coming?"

Kate hummed.

"Are you gonna dance with me?" he tried his luck.

Kate hummed again, making Castle wonder if she was actually listening.

"Are you going to wear a skimpy dress?" he asked her, his voice even lower against her ear.

She hummed a third time before blinking a few times. "Wait ... what?"

Castle let out a bark of laughter, before guiltily clamping his hands over his mouth. Both adults listened carefully for any signs that Louis had awoken, but it seemed they were in luck.

Kate turned around to face him, a look of worry on her face. "Did you say Tuesday?"

Castle nodded.

"That's inconvenient," she told him, a look of regret now gracing her features. "I have to work on Tuesday and Wednesday. And what about Louis? I can't ask Rosa to take him for another night and to get up early in the morning to get him ready for school. She may be his babysitter, but she does have a life of her own." She pursed her lips, hoping he would understand that she couldn't ask someone else to basically play mother for a whole twenty-four hours for a child that wasn't hers.

She saw how his face fell and quickly apologized. "I'm sorry Castle, I really want to, but I need to find a solution that works for Louis."

"I may have one," he told her, quickly thinking it through again before voicing it.

"I could pick up Louis and Alexis from school and take them to the loft. You can join us after work, and we'll have some cake and cook dinner for the kids. We'll put them to bed together - Louis can join Alexis in my mother's room - it's soundproof, didn't want to scar Alexis," his eyes went wide with fear at only the thought of that possibility, "Meaning they'll sleep undisturbedly and you too will sleep over at the loft. You can slip away from the party at any point and sleep in my room. It's soundproof as well, because -"

"Because you didn't want to scar Alexis?" Kate interjected, her eyebrows raised.

"Exactly," Castle admitted with a shrug. "So you can go to sleep whenever you want and in the morning, I'll get both kids ready for school, so you can sleep a little longer, and I'll only wake you when it's time to walk them to school." He finished his suggestion with a proud smile. "What do you say?"

"Seems like I don't have much of a choice with a well-wrought plan like that," she grinned and wound her arms around his neck, delighted that she was able to attend his birthday party after all.

"No you don't," he grinned and kissed her languidly, moaning when her lips parted under the resolute glide of his tongue.

A little breathless, he pulled back and rested his forehead against hers. "I needed that after the highly unpleasant evening I've had."

"Glad to be of assist," Kate smirked, her hands resting on his shoulders. "What were you up to?" she asked, only now taking in the suit he was wearing.

"I had dinner with Gina." When he saw confusion creeping into her features, he was quick to elaborate. "We talked _Derrick Storm_. Only a few more weeks until the new book comes out and we went over the last few details and discussed upcoming book tours. The bloodsucker," he laughed quietly and shook his head, "Always greedy for money."

Kate's features softened but there was still something Castle couldn't place.

"You'll meet her on Tuesday," he told her, lacing his hands together behind her back to keep her close.

"Gee, I can't wait," she retorted dryly.

Castle chuckled. "She's not all bad, just very business-oriented." And after a small pause he found several other words to describe his ex-fiancée. "And cold. And snappish. And uptight. And- You get the picture. At least she's like that when we're talking business, she's a whole different person when you're friends with her. But since we only do business together, I mostly get to see her nasty side." His eyes clouded over a little at that.

"Sounds like you two aren't getting along too well?" The concern was clear on Kate's face. Concern for his daughter and how the aftermath of this break-up may affect her.

"As I said she's very business-oriented and a very successful woman, but nothing is ever enough for her, so she tries to get everything she can out of one deal, regardless of the consequences. I used to admire her for going at everything so strong-willed. Now it just annoys the crap out of me. When I said she was regardless of any consequences I meant it," he emphasized with raised eyebrows. "She basically ignores the fact that I'm a dad. Unfortunately, she's one of the best at what she does, and she knows me, that's why we are still working together. But don't worry, when I'll introduce you to her at the party, she'll probably be very pleasant company. If not, there's always my mother," he smirked and tickled her spine with one of his fingers that were still laced together behind her back to ease some of the tension that now hung between them like persistent fog.

"I hope I'll be hanging out more with your mother than with Gina." It was clear to Castle that Kate didn't know what to expect of his publisher.

"You're not business related, she'll be nice." He finally saw some of the worry leave Kate's face. "Speaking of my mother, I should probably relieve her of her baby-sitting duties." He smiled wistfully, wishing he could be with Kate a little longer.

"Thanks for stopping by Castle, it was a pleasant surprise. And thanks for the massage, you have very talented hands," Kate leered.

"Oh, you have no idea," he grinned mischievously and pulled her a little closer. "Just wait until I show you just how talented my hands really are," he growled quietly and attacked her lips, his hands on her back pulling her flush against his body and holding her there.

"Castle," Kate mumbled into the kiss. He broke away from her mouth and trailed a series of kisses along her jaw to her ear, only to suck on the soft spot he found there. "Castle," Kate tried again. "Your mother and Alexis," she added on a breath, trying to keep a moan from escaping since it would totally defeat the purpose of getting him to stop.

At the mention of his mother, Castle froze instantly. "Right." He took a step away from her, a dazzled look on his face. "Right, I wanted to leave. Right," he repeated again, his mind still a little hazy. "So I'll just leave." He pointed at the door and Kate shot him an amused look.

"Night, Castle."

"Night, Kate. See you Tuesday."

XXX

On Tuesday, Kate left the Precinct in a hurry. She drove her Crown Vic to Castle's apartment building and surprisingly got a parking spot that wasn't too far away from Castle's home. Getting out of the car, she grabbed a heavy duffel bag and a smaller plastic bag out of the trunk, before locking it and walking the short distance to the loft.

Castle opened the door with a wide grin. "You're here!" He relieved her of the heavy duffel bag and closed the door behind her.

She searched the loft for the presence of the children and when she found no indication that they were downstairs, she pressed her lips to his in a quick kiss. "Happy birthday, Castle," she told him with a soft smile.

He beamed at her.

"You'll get a proper kiss once the kids are in bed." Kate winked at him before placing the plastic bag she still carried on the counter, leaving Castle by the door, who suddenly couldn't wait for the kids to be tired.

No sooner than she had taken off her shoes, Louis was running down the stairs and towards her.

"Mommy!" He threw his arms around her waist when he finally reached her.

"Hey Tiger, what's up? Did you have a fun day?" She hugged him back and pressed a kiss to his hair.

Castle had called her during her lunch break and told her he had successfully picked both kids up from school and they were having a ball helping each other with their homework and looking through Alexis' science textbook in wonder; science being an interest they had in common. Kate hadn't worried about her son, she knew he was in good hands but she was still glad she could hold him close and seek reassurance in his brown eyes.

Louis nodded eagerly. "Alexis and I have been playing table football."

"Who won?" Kate asked him.

"We both did," Alexis chimed in, making her way down the stairs, obviously having overheard the conversation Kate and Louis had had.

"But right now we are having a championship. Best two out of three should decide who the champion is." The redhead crossed her arms in front of her chest and leveled Louis with a challenging look. The boy returned the look, also crossing his arms in front of his chest and stood a little straighter, making him almost as tall as Alexis.

They stared at each other for a few seconds, before Alexis turned around on her heel, aiming a "Race you!" at Louis over her shoulder, and heading for the stairs, the boy immediately following her with a giggle.

"Whoa, wait, I brought dinner!" Kate held them back and had to stifle a laugh at how comically quick both children came to a halt on the stairs, feet poised mid-air.

Kate pointed at the plastic bag on the kitchen counter. "I hope Chinese is okay with you?"

Castle had already gotten out plates for the children. He and Kate would eat later at the party, for which he had hired a caterer.

While the kids sat at the counter, eating happily, Castle asked Kate to follow him, her duffel bag slung over his shoulder. He had previously explained to the children that Kate would be sleeping in his room because, apart from his mother's room, where the kids would sleep, it was the only soundproof room in the house and the children understood that Kate needed to sleep at some point since she had to get up early in the morning and go to work. They had simply accepted that explanation with a shrug, obviously thinking their parents were having the same kind of sleepover they were.

Castle led Kate through his office, a room she had yet to inspect more carefully, and into his bedroom. Just as the rest of his loft, his bedroom was very stylish. The heart of the room was definitely the large king-sized bed with its leather headboard. Large black-and-white prints of a lion and an elephant decorated the walls and in one corner was a cozy looking loveseat with a reading lamp on a table next to it. A place Kate couldn't wait to curl up in and read a book from Castle's tasteful collection. But not tonight, tonight she was here to celebrate the man himself.

Castle went straight into the walk-in closet and placed Kate's duffel bag on an empty shelf, something that made her raise her eyebrows at him. She was certain the shelf wasn't empty by coincidence.

Castle noticed her look and tried to act casual. "I just wanted you to have enough space. I figured you must have packed several outfits for yourself and Louis." He shrugged it off as if it were no big deal that he had made space in his closet for her and Kate decided to let it go, but just because it was his birthday.

She thanked him and he showed her his bathroom. The term 'bathroom' was actually an understatement for the large room with all its high-tech functions. He had a large shower she wasn't sure how to operate, a bathtub that could easily pass for a small hot tub and a variety of large mirrors so you could see yourself from many different angles.

He had two sinks and while the one on the right was clearly his, the one on the left was equipped with fresh towels and a still wrapped bar of soap. It was clearly meant for her.

He placed one of his hands low on her back, while the other reached for the door of a cabinet that was located beneath the sinks.

"This is where I store the bath salts and bubbles. Feel free to use them any time," he offered generously. He must have seen her basically ogling his bathtub upon entering. Her apartment didn't come with one and she missed soaking in the hot water for hours deeply. She was sure she'd take him up on that offer at some point.

She leaned her head on his shoulder and smiled at their reflection in the mirror. "Thank you Castle, this is great. I've actually really been looking forward to this night," she admitted, a slight blush creeping into her cheeks.

"Yeah?" Castle asked with a smile of his own.

"Yeah," Kate nodded. "And happy birthday again." She turned to him and cradled his face in both of her hands as she pressed a sweet kiss to his lips. When she pulled back she found him smiling at her.

"Happy birthday to me indeed," he grinned before diving in for another kiss. He pulled her flush against his chest as his tongue swirled with hers and her hands found their way into his hair, holding him close, while she pushed up on her tiptoes, trying to minimize all space between them. The kiss was full of emotion, both participants were trying to convey feelings they didn't know how to voice yet and Kate shuddered in his arms as she thought of what he might be trying to tell her with this kiss. When he pulled her yet a little tighter into his chest, she let out the moan that she had so desperately been trying to hold back and felt him grin slightly into the kiss. If her eyes were open she would have rolled them at his smugness.

When at last he tore his mouth away from hers, both of them were panting heavily.

"I don't know if I can stay away from you tonight," he told her with wide eyes and a frightening seriousness. "I certainly don't want to."

"Yeah well, just remember that if you behave, you'll get to wake up next to me tomorrow." She gave him a coy look through through her lashes, something she knew made his knees weak.

"I can do that, I can behave," Castle nodded, trying to come across as sincere.

"Good," Kate smirked at him. She was happy as long as he tried. "Let's check on the children," she suggested. They have been gone for way too long already and she didn't want to raise suspicion. Even though the kids were far too innocent to think about the possibility that their parents might be more than just friends having a sleepover, she didn't want to push it.

They went back into the living room after smoothing down Castle's hair, which had been thoroughly mussed by Kate's hands, and only found two empty plates on the counter and no children in sight. They must have gone to finish their table football tournament.

Castle shrugged his shoulders and went over to the large leather couch in his living room. He placed his hands on one arm of the couch. "Can you help me push this to the side? This will be the dance floor and I wouldn't want anyone to topple over any furniture."

Only now did Kate notice the slight changes in the loft. There was a large stereo in one corner and adjustable lights scattered around the ground floor for proper party-lighting. A lot of the furniture has already been moved, all that was left for them was the large couch and the coffee table.

With combined muscle power they pushed the heavy piece of furniture to the side and Kate took care of the small coffee table herself while Castle cleaned up the mess the children had left behind in the kitchen.

They were just about to go up the stairs and ask who had finally won the tournament when Alexis and Louis came down the stairs.

"Daddy?" Alexis started, soft eyes focused on her father. "Can all four of us do something together before we have to go to bed? Something special since it's your birthday?" Her eyes darted from Castle to Kate and back to Castle. "I know we had cake together this afternoon and watched cartoons but I want to do something that we don't do every day." The faintest blush of rose painted the pale girl's cheeks.

Upon hearing his daughter's shy request Castle quickly covered the distance between them and silently pulled her in for a hug, his lips pressed to her forehead.

Sensing their need for a moment in private, Kate waved Louis over into the kitchen. It pained Kate to see sweet and cheeky Alexis so insecure and unsure of herself, almost afraid to ask for something so simple. Her mother's absence must have taken a heavier toll on the girl than Kate had previously thought.

When she heard Alexis giggle, she turned around again. Castle was holding her upside down by the waist, his large palms easily bracketing the slender girl's body, as he pretended to sweep the floor with the tips of her red ponytail.

Kate shook her head at the silly, yet absolutely adorable picture they made. Once more it became clear to her what a good father Castle was; able to erase the shy and insecure look on the girl's face and turning into one of glee within minutes.

"We decided on a birthday tournament," Castle announced, starting to carry an upside down Alexis towards the stairs.

Kate was unsure if she and Louis should follow. It seemed like father and daughter might want some one-on-one time, so she hesitantly lingered in the kitchen.

"Are you guys coming?" Castle asked, already halfway up the stairs. He looked at Louis and Kate and must have seen the hesitation in their posture. "It's alright, come on."

He waited for the two Becketts to set in motion before going back to the task at hand - swinging Alexis from side to side like a pendulum, making her shriek with delight.

Upstairs, Castle lead them to one of the doors that branch from the long hallway. He turned to her, mindful that she has never been upstairs before. "The first door on the left is Alexis' room, the first one on the right mother's. The other two are guestrooms and the last one", he pointed at the door straight ahead of them at the end of the hallway, "Is kind of our party room if you will."

He lifted Alexis higher, his biceps bulging under his sweater - as Kate noticed with a suddenly very dry throat - so the girl could open the door for them.

He finally set Alexis down again, and Kate took a look around the room. It was a party room alright. Not only did he have a table football, he had a pool table, a poker table, a game of darts and a karaoke machine.

She caught his gaze and smirked at him. He shot her a questioning look but she only shook her head. She wouldn't tell him that she'd love to spend some time - some alone time when everyone else was asleep - with him in this room once they have advanced a little in their relationship; the sight of the pool table having conjured up images in her head that were far from being rated PG.

She shook her head to will the thoughts and pictures to go away and saw Castle already holding onto two of the handles of the table football. "You wanna be on my team, Alexis?", he asked and the redhead tilted her head slightly to one side.

"No, I want to play with Louis. Increasing my chances of winning," she giggled, fully back to her old, slightly cheeky self.

"But no crying if you lose," Castle warned her with a twinkle of amusement in his eyes.

"I never cry," Alexis defended herself, siding up to Louis on the other side of the table. "Because I never lose." Her voice was light and Castle mumbled something unintelligible, that sounded much like "Need to change that," to Kate's ears.

Castle rolled the first ball onto the table and before Kate could as much as twist her wrist and get the tiny army of soccer players to move, Louis had expertly scored a goal, leaving Kate and Castle speechless.

"I told you he was good," Alexis grinned and proudly looked at her friend who grinned back.

"I can't believe it!" Castle exclaimed twenty minutes later, still perplexed. They had just tucked the children in in Martha's large bed, a cartoon playing on the small TV in her room, and were now in the kitchen, helping the catering service that had just arrived to settle in.

"They beat us! We had three, _three_," he stresses the number and even holds up the first three fingers of his left hand, "Goals. She couldn't have let me won? It's my birthday," he whined, not sounding like a man who's turning 31 today but like a three year old boy who wasn't allowed to have another cookie.

"You'll live," Kate said with probably less sympathy than Castle had hoped for. "How long do we have until the first guests arrive?"

"They should arrive at around nine." He checked his watch before looking at her again, "Which leaves us about an hour."

"Just enough time to give you your present before I have to get ready," Kate told him with a playful wink and already started walking towards the direction of his bedroom.

"You got me a present?" Castle was quick to catch up with her, the excitement clear in his voice, even when he told her, "You didn't need to get me anything."

Kate knew he hadn't expected her to get him anything, but she had anyway.

She walked into the closet to her duffel bag and got out a rectangular package. She handed it to him with a smile. "It's nothing big, but I stumbled across it while taking a walk in the city one day and immediately had to think of you."

Castle carefully tore away the red gift wrapping paper and his hands closed around a beautiful dark brown leather-bound notebook with a large brass clasp in front to keep it closed. The heavy pages and uneven leather gave it a slightly antique feel.

"Oh Kate," he breathed as he ran his fingertips across the rough leather of the notebook, "It's beautiful, thank you."

"Yeah? You like it?" She tried to catch his gaze as he further inspected the notebook and a wave of relief washed through her as she saw the honest awe and happiness on his face as he clutched it to his chest.

"I love it." He smiled widely and pressed a tender kiss to her lips.

"I'm glad." She really was. She had been somewhat at a loss when she noticed that his birthday was coming up. He was a multi-millionaire, he could easily buy himself everything he wanted, so what could she possibly offer him? She had always found personal and unique gifts were the best and had hoped the notebook would fulfill both categories. Apparently it did.

With a proud glimmer in her eyes she watched as he carefully placed the notebook in the small drawer of his nightstand. He rounded the bed and came back to her to give her another tender kiss.

"Is it wrong for me to wish I could just cancel the party and spend the rest of the evening with you?" he whispered.

Kate chuckled. "But don't you want to see the dress I picked?" She gave him a saucy look and slightly nibbled her bottom lip in a way she knew drove him crazy, and grinned when his gaze focused on her mouth.

"You could still wear it, even if it's just the two of us." He already started pulling her closer to him but she quickly stepped out of his reach.

"Nu-uh, you'll have to wait till the party." With one last saucy look over her shoulder, she grabbed her duffel bag and disappeared into his bathroom.

"That's not how you treat the birthday boy!" she heard him whining on the other side of the door. "You're supposed to grant him all his wishes!"

Kate just rolled her eyes and shimmied out of her work clothes. She folded them together and pulled on the dress she had chosen. The black dress was short, yet not overly so, and only had one strap, leaving her left shoulder bare. Something that would drive Castle a little crazy, she was sure of it.

She decided to leave her hair as it was - the curly ends lying artfully on her shoulders. But she did decide to touch up her make-up a little. She skillfully applied a second layer of mascara and reached for her eyeliner.

After also applying a layer of lipgloss she was pleased to see she still had fifteen minutes before the first guests would arrive. She slipped into the black pumps she had brought and carried her duffel bag back out into the closet where she almost stumbled into Castle, who had just slipped into a dark red dress shirt.

His eyes went wide when he saw her and with a smirk she observed his gaze linger on her bare left shoulder.

"Now I really want to cancel the party," Castle said breathily, still taking her in, his own half-buttoned shirt forgotten.

She stepped close to him and started buttoning up his shirt before she too started drooling. "Too bad that's not an option. But if you behave tonight, I'll wake up in your arms tomorrow." Just to tease him a little, she made sure to touch the skin of his chest every now and then as she fastened one button after the other.

"Behave." He ran a hand over his face. "Right. I can do that," he nodded as if to reassure himself.

"Good," Kate smirked and pressed a quick kiss to his lips.

"But I still have," he quickly checked the Rolex that adorned his wrist, "About ten minutes where I don't have to behave." He grinned cockily before he leaned down and kissed her so thoroughly all coherent thought left her and if it weren't for his strong arm around her waist she would have probably crumbled to the floor. His right hand began playing with the skin of her bare shoulder, trailing down to her shoulder blade, leaving goose bumps in its wake and she just hoped he really could behave himself at the party tonight because when he touched her like that, she didn't know if she would be able to resist him.

When he pulled back, there was probably more lipgloss on his lips than on hers. Using her thumb, she wiped it away and he returned the favor.

"Beautiful," Castle said and she looked up at him with the heat of a rose blush climbing up her cheeks, "You look simply beautiful."

She shot him a shy smile. "You don't look too bad yourself, birthday boy."

He tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear as way of thanks.

"Come on, let's get you a glass of champagne, people should be arriving any minute."

A sudden thought occurred to Kate. "Castle, what will the caterers think? We've been in this room together for almost an hour!"

"First of all, they were busy preparing the food and drinks, second of all, I've used this service for years, they are very discreet. But if you prefer, you could always use the other door." He pointed to the door that led you from the bedroom into a hallway from where you could also enter the living room.

"No, I trust you," Kate smiled at him and squeezed his hand.

That was probably the greatest gift Castle had gotten for his birthday so far.

Together they went into the living room, got Kate started on a glass of champagne and a few nuts that were standing on the counter, and Castle plugged his iPod into the stereo.


End file.
